Criticism. Condemnation. Complaining.
The ultimate killers of humanity and a few of the deadly horsemen that Napoleon Hill mentioned in his book almost a hundred years ago.
“When dealing with people, let us remember we are not dealing with creatures of logic. We are dealing with creatures of emotion, creatures bristling with prejudices and motivated by pride and vanity.” – Dale Carnegie
The most notable criticism I ever dished out was back in marching band in Las Vegas, Sophomore year of high school. There was a band mate by the name of Randy, who was a trumpet player. This particular individual, for whatever reason, is someone I would literally hurl a cluster of adjectives at for seemingly no reason. Being young isn’t an excuse. The entire ordeal was completely out of hand; and after one of my best friends approached me about it, I felt so incredibly bad to the point I never made fun of him again for the rest of my time in high school.
It was not only out of character, but just foolish – regardless if I was young or not.
In Dale Carnegie’s book, there was a man named Bob Hoover – a famous test pilot that and frequent performer at air shows.
One day he was in the air twisting, spinning, and putting on a show for the people below when suddenly both engines failed. By deft maneuvering, he was able to land the plane. This type of plane, which was built during WWII, was flying with jet fuel instead of regular gasoline.
One could imagine how furious Bob was after nearly killing himself in the air. This all came at the hands of a mechanic, who was completely aghast and crying because not only did he destroy an expensive plane, but he almost killed three others onboard, too.
One could imagine the tongue-lashing Hoover was going to unleash upon this young man. However, it didn’t happen. He walked over, put his arm around the mechanic and said, “to show you that I’m sure you’ll never do this again, I want you to service my F-51 tomorrow.”
Imagine that poise! How calm, cool, and collective can someone be after such a frightening experience? Because Hoover was so cool, he knew that human beings make mistakes. Condemnation, criticism and shouting at the mechanic would’ve done nothing.
Instead of condemning people, let’s try to understand them. Let’s try to figure out why they do what they do. That’s a lot more profitable and intriguing than criticism; and it breeds sympathy, tolerance and kindness. “To know all is to forgive all.”