Wrong question, first of all.
The question should be, “why don’t I love myself?”
Yes, I’ve been in the same shoes as you.
I remember taking a scenic running route in Sydney, Australia (Lane Cove) down to a dock and one of my housemates messaged me and said, “are you ok? You’ve been very quiet?” I retorted, “I don’t think I have a good personality. No one likes me here. I don’t understand why I don’t have a girlfriend.”
The next words she wrote has stuck with me ever since then.
“You have one of the most gorgeous personalities I’ve ever witnessed in my entire life. Where’s your dignity?”
Did that change me? No. However, there was a disruption.
In the ensuing years, especially here in Thailand, I was met with some of the darkest forces and had to take them on head on. Was it me against the women of Thailand? To a certain extent, but it was their negative opinions whereas I became saturated in, “Thai women hate black men,” and literally spewed that rhetoric for 1.5-2 years until I finally got my belief system back.
Postive, reaffirming language will help you. Changing your paradigm is definitely the stepping stone. But there is just one small technique that you can use from today…..just look yourself in the mirror at home. Go on. Have a nice look at your face. Look at the freckles, wrinkles, skin tone, teeth, hair, eyes, eye lashes, forehead and everything. Are you content? Were you ever content? How about your neck down? Are you happy with the way you look in the mirror? My guess is no.
I had an anonymous podcast listener send this to me and it surely resonates within all of us…..don’t become saturated with the beliefs of other fools who shouldn’t be telling their feelings out-loud to begin with.
Start loving yourself form head-to-toe….and you’ll notice a massive difference in the people who come into your life.