When In Doubt, Check It Out: Part II + Feeling The Fear & Doing It Anyways

Phew, I woke up in the morning on February 6th, contemplating whether or not I was going to block this fair-weather person who I had just met a week prior.  This person, who has sent me a crazy amount of jobs on a daily basis, has never given me a job.  Let’s put it this way, imagine that you met someone on a job site and she would send you daily job updates on newly updated gigs.  You “apply” for those gigs through an application, and then that’s the end.  You literally waste time applying for something that doesn’t even exist – either that or the students are just very adamant with studying with a colored guy.

Anywho, I was contemplating in the shower and I told myself, “Arsenio, don’t just pull the historical action of blocking someone without saying anything.  Confront her, check out what’s going on, then make a decision.”

I did just that.  A couple hours later I got a response from her telling me what was going on.  I said to myself, “man, regardless if I think she’s full of $hit, I would’ve gotten rid of her without any explanation.”  This is my problem.  Impulse.  When you’re in doubt and you’re not sure what’s going on, ask the question.  Straight up.

Feel The Fear

Let me explain this particular day.  After the events that have taken place the last few days in terms of me finally resigning and getting out of the toxic environment, I’ve been pondering worse case scenarios (and I should resort back to my Dale Carnegie book) because I don’t know what’s happening.  What’s next.  Will I get a job? Will a company accept me? I need primary income while building this empire on YouTube.

I was walking this morning, adding up all the figures and figuring out what I should do.  A job, which I thought pulled a hiatus a week ago, messaged me two days after I sent the initial message.  This was the online teaching gig – and now it’s a thing of the past.  I tried looking at other ways of making income and nothing was happening.

Luckily and thankfully I got a quick response from a companion, telling me to fulfill a role in the afternoon before doing my evening gig.  On top of that, I got a new student.  However, the most disturbing aspect of it all was the potential was my job-for-only-7-more-weeks offering me two classes, which I haven’t been offered a god damn thing in the last four months.  It’s almost like a slap in the faith.  But what should I do: hold my pride together and say “f*** you,” or accept the job because it’s income? Explanation in the podcast down below.



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