Ramble of Positivity: Episode 19 – The Emergence of ??????

Man, oh man! It’s been a long time since I’ve done a ramble of positivity, and I’m super grateful to be back! Two weeks into the New Years….it’s definitely at a surplus in terms of projects, teaching and learning.  However, there is a little bit of an issue.

Now, I told myself I needed to live in these day-tight compartments because I have no idea what’s going on in the future.  Honestly, within the next three months, there’s a massive chance that I might experience a major transition (leaving from Thailand).

At the beginning of the New Year, I thought I was destined to land a job with a 65-year-old language school in Bangkok.  The interview process was superb and everything went well.  However, after a follow-up email and a week later, I got scared.  I felt that something was happening, but wasn’t sure what.  That feeling lead to me not getting the job for VERY OBVIOUS THAI REASONS and then there was the question: “should I keep doing this?”

I’ve preached so much about going after your purpose.  I’m getting ideas now about developing a curriculum online that students can easily access and learn English all over the world – a system that can trump language centers in a heartbeat.  This is going to take some massive pondering and setting up, but I’m pretty excited about it.

There comes a time in life, however, when you just get sick and tired of nonsense.  I’ve dealt with racial degradation for five years already.  In the beginning, it was new.  I needed to go through the amount of hell for me to become the influential person I am today.  On the other hand, the things that I continue going through today is just — boring.  I already got the point.  Yes, I’m a brown guy living in one of the most anti-brown guy countries on the face of planet Earth….which brings me to the questions….

Am I still learning?

  • Hell no.

Am I still growing?

  • In terms of my podcast, YouTube, Herbalife, speaking, etc….absolutely.  As a teacher in my primary job – absolutely not.

Are there still opportunities?

  • The only way I stay in Thailand is if I work at a multi-national country and make over 100,000 baht (3,300 USD). Other than that, side-projects are great, but they don’t provide anymore than just that – a side project.

Do I still want to live here?

  • Well, lets just say in a perfect world everything goes well and I can work in Bangkok….my max is one year — this year.  After that, I’m finished.  Unless something miraculous happens, I’m over Asia.

Is this a place to live for the next ten years?

  • I don’t know what opportunity Thailand provides anymore because of the amount of obstacles I have to go through.  The proving grounds and continuous (can you send us a video of how you teach) versus other teachers getting the job because of the color of their skin — it’s just pointless.  I don’t have to prove myself anymore.  With Facebook pages in the education and podcast sector totalling over 10,000 likes and constant content creation: “you said I needed to make a video because?”

What’s the end goal?

  • True happiness.  True fulfillment.  That’s why I do my ‘wheels of life’ on a monthly basis.  However, if there’s one area that’s causing 80% of my unhappiness, it’s the constant “needing a job” and trying to figure out the process.  My end goal is to obvious have my website up and running, posting videos on Facebook regularly, creating blogs, putting out content, doing things with other students and creating videos on a multitude of platforms.  On top of that, I still absolutely love teaching, but other than the money, what’s the point of staying here anymore?  I need to be smart about the process and see what situation I’ll possibly be heading into.  If I can make residual income on a monthly basis, Thailand would be finished.  Let’s just put it that way.

I’m so happy and grateful for being able to teach wonderful students a language and an idea with that language over the last three days.

I’m truly grateful for the present I got from a Deputy Prime Minister last night – and also knowledge along with that.

With all my heart, Im thankful for all areas of my life.  I’m extremely thankful for the wonderful people I’ve met the past few days and the dozens of new friends I’ve made.  I’m grateful for the posters on my FB pages who want more.  I’m thankful for my friends who tune into my blog, along with other bloggers; and I’m also super happy about my podcast and everyone viewing my videos on YouTube.

THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU!

Now, I just added in the emergence….and you will be amazed who this person is.  17 years…..and he decided to add me on FB.  Oh, what a story this is going to be!  Only in the podcast!

Podcast

https://www.spreaker.com/user/thearseniobuckshow/the-ramble-of-positivity-episode-19-the-

 

Questions & Answers: How Did I Develop My Strength/What Makes You Different From Your Brother?

Wonderful question came in today from a friend in Japan asking something very deep – something I somewhat covered in my last podcast.  So, here are the questions.

Where do you get your strength from?

I lived in Australia for one year.  I thought I was ostricized by society.  There were days I thought I was depressed and told my housemate, “no one likes me here.”

She retorter, “you have a beautiful personality! Don’t worry about others!”  Of course all I did at the time was watch the secret.  There was no Les Brown, Lisa Nichols, MindValley, Tom Bilyeu, or any of these other entrepreneurs, speakers and massive business titans.  I didn’t know the process in terms of bio-hacking the mind.  So throughout my stint in Australia, I had to learn the hard way.  I had a fair-weather friend named Thayanna who ended up disappearing mid-way through the way.  There was no “best friend” from Arizona, just like  there wasn’t in October of 2014 (later story) and last year.  I then realized throughout everything I experienced in Australia…my mother, with a simple comment, pretty much told me that there was no quitting.

“So you’re complaining about life there? If you come back….then what? I don’t have a place for you to stay.  Tina is living here.  You don’t know what to do.”

Basically I can go on and on about that text message but she pretty much gave me a big “f*** you” and “there’s no room for you at the house anymore.”  It was like the disownment I needed.  The “build your courage now or you’re homeless” type of motivation.  And from then on….I never gave up — and a seed was born within me.

Podcast

Aggressive Mask: Part IV – What Can We Do Right Now?

“In the middle of my conversation with Ray Lewis, I asked him about his definition of a man and whether it had evolved as he got older, had kids, became successful, and ultimately retired. By way of answering my question, he told me a story about when he came to a deeper understanding of the challenges the men in his family have faced.

He was 33 years old. He’d reengaged with his long-absent father, and his father wanted him to meet a man named Shady Ray Whitehead who lived in some little trailer 6 hours outside of Charlotte, North Carolina. He had no idea where they were going or who this man was they were visiting, but when they arrived, he and his father walked in and his father said, “Meet your grandfather.”

Ray sat on the floor while his dad sat on the couch, and they talked. One of the first things out of his father’s mouth was a question to his grandfather that had also run through Ray’s head nearly every day of the first 17 years of his life: “Dad, why’d you leave me?” To say this blindsided Ray would be an understatement.

“Ray sat with this information for a while, listening to his father and grandfather, and started to think about the men in his family who struggled in their relationships. Ray’s realization is something out of a novel, or a sermon:

This is a generational curse, man. My son is 21, I’m 41, my father is 61, my grandfather’s 81. His father is 101. Five generations. Twenty years apart. What are we doing? I rode back home with my father for 6 hours while he kept talking, and I never said a word. When I got done listening to him, I said to him: “You know what a man is? A man accepts all of the wrongs, never complains, forgives, and then moves on.” That’s what a man does, because you can never replace him not being at a football game. Never replace him not being to a wrestling match, or a track meet. Beat up by a group of kids? You can never replace him not being there. You can never replace that. So what you can replace is you can replace it with moving on.”

“This is our work to do. The rewards are, indeed, waiting for us, but they will not make themselves known until we begin the process of dropping our Aggressive Mask.”

Replace it with moving on.  It’s time to top off the chapter with my own story.

My father, in 1999, dropped my brother, my sisters, and I off at a doorstep of a house before driving away.  He said, “knock on the door and ask for your mother.”  We did, and he sped off, not seeing him again for the ensuing months.  It was odd, me being only 11 years old and living in more than 5 different households over a year span.

In 2000, I saw someone walking down the street and said, “that looks like my dad!”  Minutes later, I went back home and I was right.  It was my father….and him being in the same household as my mother, went nuts.  Not necessarily on his end, but my mother bursts into anger anytime she hears the name “Willie.”  He wanted “in” our lives, and so my mother granted that if we wanted it.

I remember he was on the phone and I was suppose to go to him that weekend.  I said, “dad, do you have the video games?”  What sounded like video games weren’t, but my father was a master at lying.  After naming three videos games, the third one being my favorite, I bursted into tears of joy before going upstairs to tell my mom.  My mother eavesdropped on the conversation because you could do that by picking up the other line 18 years ago.  I told her what my father got and she said, “he didn’t get you those games. He’s lying.”

I said, “you never did anything for us.”

She cried.

I felt absolutely wretched….even more wretched because she was telling the truth.  My dad was a liar from day 1 and I never knew it until of course that day.  I remember seeing him maybe late 2000 after he came over.  After that, I never saw him again, only hearing his voice on a bus in 2007 and looking square into his eyes in another incident (on the bus) one year later.

I’m blaming him for being the amazing man I am today.

“A man who struggles with aggression needs, first and foremost, to channel his energy and anger in a constructive direction. There are a number of ways to do this at a practical level:
▸Create a wrecking room in your house where you can get it out safely. Fill it with things to smash, push, hit, and pummel. If you can’t get a room, get a pillow. Beat the hell out of it. And repeat.
▸Do cathartic shouting exercises once a week. Scream it out!
▸Take a boxing class, work out, swim, or run.
▸Create an affirmation (e.g., “I’m a peaceful, joyful, loving man”) that you say when you want to break something or get aggressive. – Lewis Howes

Podcast

 

Aggressive Mask: Part II

“Unaddressed anger is the glue that keeps the Aggressive Mask stuck in place, starting very early and lasting, in many cases, for decades. There is research on this, and it testifies to how much young boys, in particular, are soaked in anger. For many of them, anger is the only emotion that is “acceptable” to express.” – Lewis Howes

Blueprints, right? I mean anger is taught.  No way in hell it’s genetics…thats just the genetic make-up of a human being.  Men develop an insurmountable amount of anger over years – I’m one of them.  I’m not sure when it started developing, but late 2003 – 2004, I was enraged.  When I played video games, I would cry when I lost because I thought the game was “cheating.”  My mom would scream at me and tell me to stop playing the game.  Of course this is a story I told in my podcast before, but this is the aggression and crazy amount of anger that I suffered from during my sophomore year of high school.

It wasn’t until I joined Track and Field when it changed.  Again, if I had joined football, I would’ve been talked about in this part of Lewis Howes book.

Ashley Burch, who’s a writer said “when an emotion sneaks in for a male character [in video games], by and large, it is anger. And any sort of grief is very, very underplayed and never actually discussed or processed. Kids end up really looking up to this character. And what they end up idolizing is someone who cannot express themselves emotionally, cannot be honest or open with anyone around them.”

I’ve had the privilege of not having such a tumultuous childhood involving physical abuse both inside and outside the home.  However, I must tell a story that no one actually knows about.

Back in 1997, my father took full custody from my mother and we hopped from one side of Las Vegas to another.  During that time, his second girlfriend, named Kim, had a song and daughter named Brandon and Emily.  This was a family of three from Missouri (a small town in the middle of nowhere).  I didn’t make anything of the pair initially, but then things started happening.  I can’t remember exactly where, but let’s just say it was in the second apartment we lived in.  Brandon would shout, “n*****” at me.  When this happened, I would beat the bricks out of him (lol – but it’s funny – a little).  He would come up with blood coming from his nose and his mom would scream, “what happened to you?!”

“Arsenio punched me.”

I then said, “you called me a N*****!”

……crickets…..

The mother couldn’t defend her son for using such a degrading word.

These were the times when my brother wasn’t around because of his constant anger issues, which he probably got from my mother at the time because of all household issues.  So, I would have to fight my way.  I was bullied a couple days until I retaliated the 3rd day.  This was the day, and only day when I hit another human bring outside of sibling rivalries.  The bully, by the name of Richard, was shoving me forward and backward — and out of impulse — I swung my arm right across the top of his nose, breaking it.

That was 1998.  Fast-forward it to 2001, my friend Billy, who’s still my best friend today, came to a huge disagreement while playing basketball.  In the moment, he began flailing his arms at my face.  I stepped back a few times and grabbed his shirt, swinging him all over the floor before his mother came out and yelled, “I’m gonna kick yal’s asses!”

How did I remain composed? Billy, who would constantly call me poor over the course of a year, deserved a pair of hands to be laid upon his face.  I never had the courage to do it.  Maybe because when I was younger, I saw my mother and father put knives in each other’s faces.  I was never a violent individual – even going back to the Brandon days.

On the other hand and with great respect, I feel my brother wasn’t the lucky one.  I truly believe that my brother ended up getting a piece of the “90’s” mother and father in him.  I recently talked to my sister and she says they never speak to him because he’s always angry.  He’s demanding.  Everything is always right to him….and this is why the relationship between him and I sailed a long time ago.  That anger has lead to destructive habits which he engages in everyday.  The fact that I believe he’s a compulsive gambler, betting on superficial sports games to make ends meet, is a very valid point.  When “little brother” tries inviting him into another world, he becomes angry, gets defensive, combative, and belligerent.

I played sports (Track & Field); but my brother, on the other hand, never played sports.  Could this be the reason why there’s a lot of animosity?

Podcast

https://www.spreaker.com/user/thearseniobuckshow/aggressive-mask-part-ii-stories-from-chi

Napoleon Hill: Cooperation – The Necessary Instructions For Action

Gary Vee kind of s***s on the secret, saying that “if you think you’re just going to visualize sitting in a yacht, thing again!”  He was talking on The Breakfast Club, a controversial show, and shortly after one of the speakers said, “hey, I actually believe that – but you have to follow it with action.”

See you have physical action and mental action.  You can be very active with your mind while your body is inactive.  If you believe that visualizing a billion dollars in your lap will make you obtain a billion dollars without inspired action or a burning desire, think again.

There are some men of action.  One his a dynamo and one is a balanced wheel.

The man who is a “balanced-wheel” who does nothing but compile facts, figures and statistics is just as much as a man of action as the man who goes upon the platform and sells an idea to a thousand people by the sheer power of his active personality.

A good reference is when a man, who has hated me, called for a meeting and almost my ahead.  He sat there showing statistics that were completely covering up the internal problem of the company.  He said, “your renewals are going down.”  I can sit here and justify why my renewals are going down, but the fact and matter is that one of the “top” academic teachers in the company had a 30% lower mark in renewals than me – yet I was being scrutinized heavily for students “not renewing.”

“The world pays you for what you do and not for what you know.”

This statement could be a bit misconstrued.  What the world really pays you for is what you do and what you can make others do.

A man who can make others co-operate and do effective team-work, or inspire others so that the become more active, is no less a man of action than the man who renders effective service in a more direct manner. – Napoleon Hill

The main purpose of this book and what I’m trying to convey is to help you analyze yourself and determine what your native ability.  Figuring out your definite chief-aim is the first part.

Let’s now talk about how action can be developed.

First: Form the habit of doing each day the most distasteful tasks first.  This procedure will be difficult at first, but after you have formed the habit you will take pride in pitching into the hardest and most undesirable part of your work first.

THE MUNDANE TASKS! Remember I’ve been saying this for almost two years.  Completing the most mundane tasks first and free-ing up those attention units are pivotal.  Some people like to brush it aside, but get it done, and out of the way first.

Example, if I have to write monotonously boring reports for students, bet your a$$ I’m going to do it almost immediately.  The philosophy in terms of putting something on paper for a student rather than explaining it to them face-to-face is quite unsettling.

If someone tells me to do something that I don’t want to do…but that I have to do, I’m going to hurry up and do it.

Another example is preparing for a big project.  If my colleagues say: “could you please send this, come in and talk to us about this…blah blah blah” – I’m going to do that immediately.

Second: Place this sign in front of you where you can see it in your daily work, and put a copy in your bedroom, where it will greet you as you retire and when you arise: “Do not tell them what you can do; show them!”

Third: Repeat the following words, aloud, twelve times each night just before you go to sleep: “Tomorrow I will do everything that should be done, when it should be done, and as it should be done.  I will perform the most difficult tasks first because this will destroy the habit of procrastination and develop the habit of action in its place.”

Fourth: Carry Out These Instructions with faith in their soundness and with belief that they will develop action, in body and in mind, sufficient to enable you to realize your definite chief-aim.

Podcast

Wealth Goals For 2018

“Less time; more money!”

That was my motto heading into this year.  After all the events that had taken place in the month of October and November, I was almost sure that I could’ve made 120$ an in two hours with a private course teaching business law.  That 120$ would’ve also been nine hours of work at my present place of work.

Now that opportunity is now somewhere in the ocean, but the fact and breadcrumb is I thought I would have a great opportunity to make superior money here in Bangkok.  Interview, move, I was PRIMED for excellence, until that interviewer never came back around.

Damnit.  Did I make the right move? Did I make a smart financial decision moving to Bangkok, even though there are no job opportunities anymore? I still believe I did.  One section of Bangkok was driving me insane – the same section of Bangkok which a lady walked passed me, bringing her purse closer to her.  Yeah…happens on a routine basis in that “slummy” area. It was enough.  The constant ignorance that I saw everyday from low-class mindsets was just too much.  Sure, I paid a 800$ deposit along with the first months rent to get out of there because I knew and continue to know that the universe loves action.  I sleep with such an amazing conscious every night knowing I’m not in “that” area anymore where women grip their belongings as if I were going to snatch it away from them.

Let’s get back on track.

That was a decision of 2017.  Wealth right now is no longer an area of concern, but it’s something I need to seriously come to grip with because if I was to move out of Thailand, I’ll definitely need to be smart with my money going forward.

Podcast

Napoleon Hill’s Cooperation + Morning Ritual + How The Body Works

I was on the BTS Skytrain in the heart of Bangkok glaring out one of the windows just before the evening when I heard Valuetainment talking about the morning rituals of a lot of successful people.  Having already made a couple of blogs and podcasts on morning routine, I know this could become redundant until I saw what Napoleon Hill had done for his.

First: I drink a cup of hot water when I first get up in the morning, before I have breakfast.

Second: My breakfast consists of rolls made of whole wheat and bran, breakfast cereal, fruit, soft-boiled eggs once in a while, and coffee.  For lunch I eat vegetables (most any kind), whole wheat bread and a glass of buttermilk.  Supper, a well-cooked steak once or twice a week, vegetables, especially lettuce, and coffee.

Third: I walk an average of ten miles a day: five miles into the country and five miles back, using this period for meditation and thought.  Perhaps the thinking is as valuable, as a health build, as the walk.

Fourth: I like across a straight bottom chair, flat on my back, with most of my weight resting on the small of my back, with my head and arms relaxed completely, until they almost touch the floor.  This gives the nervous energy of my body an opportunity to balance properly and distribute itself, and ten minutes in this position will completely relieve all signs of fatigue, no matter how tired I may be.

Fifth: I take a hot shower bath, followed immediately by a cold shower, every day, usually in the morning when I first get up.

After reading through this in Napoleon Hill’s book, the fifth one capture my eyes.  Just yesterday I heard Patrick Bet-David talking about Tony Robbins plunge into cold water for one-minute before jumping into hot water.  He, unlike most people, is one of the very few people that do the plunge.  I had no idea where he got it, but now I do.

He goes on to talk about the importance of keeping his health in tip-top shape, although not laying so much stress upon the importance of keeping the intestines clean.  He does it by drinking water.

For more than fifteen years at the time of writing, there wasn’t a day that went by that he got a headache.

I love the way he put it in his book.

You cannot be a person of action if you permit yourself to go without proper physical attention until auto-intoxication takes your brain and kneads it into an inoperative mass that resembles a ball of putty.  Neither can you be a person of action if you eat the usual devitalized concoction called “white bread: *which has had all the real food value removed from it and twice as much meat as your system can digest and properly dispose of.

You cannot be a person of action if you run to the pill bottle every time you have, or imagine you have, an ache or pain, or swallow an aspirin tablet every time your intestines call on your brain for a douche bag of water and a spoonful of salt for cleansing purposes.

You cannot be a person of action if you overeat and under-exercise.

You cannot be a person of action if you read the patent medicine booklets and begin to imagine yourself ailing with the symptoms described by the clever advertisement writer who has reached your pocket book through the power of suggestion.

I will reiterate about the enemy which you must conquer before it conquers you – worry.

Worry, envy, jealousy, hatred, doubt, fear….all of these are states of mind that are fatal to taking action.

Any of these can destroy the digestive process and cause physical damage, just as Dale Carnegie said in his ‘How To Stop Worrying And Start Living’ book.  Stomach ulcers…ring a bell?

To keep myself in a positive frame of mind, I’ve discovered a very effective “gloom-chaser.”

LAUGHING!

Five minutes of this sort of mental and physical exercise can free yourself from all negative tendencies.

Podcast 

https://www.spreaker.com/user/thearseniobuckshow/napoleon-hills-cooperation-morning-ritua

Do Not Sink – Our Greatest Motivations Come Wrapped In Sandpaper: Part II

I never, and I mean I NEVER take things at face-value.

For two-and-a-half weeks I waited — constantly checking my email to see if a job prospective emailed me.  After an interview, which went down about 10 days prior happened, I almost thought that this job was locked in.  I even moved into Bangkok to get situated and prepare my new life for 2018.

Days went by…..no email.

I then spoke with one of my students on January the 6th and he gave me a huge dose of my own chemistry.

“Arsenio, you already know what happened.”

I retorted, “wait, what do you mean by that?

“You know exactly what I mean.”

The implication was they found someone else but just didn’t want to say anything to me.

However, I truly believed the interview went SO WELL that there was no way in hell I could be denied the job!  I’m unbelievably grateful because that night, after so many years of teaching, my student was the teacher and I wasn’t the student.  The closure and free-ing up of my attention units came back to me and I went on the grind again.

I sat there scratching my head saying, “well, what now?”

You know what now, Arsenio.  It’s time to close the chapter on this country you call Thailand.

What’s next lies on the horizon.

Podcast

https://www.spreaker.com/user/thearseniobuckshow/dont-sink-our-great-motivations-come-wra

Rhythms of Life + Power of Consistency

“I don’t want you thinking of the rhythms you can do for this week, month, or even the next ninety days; I want you to think about what you can do for the rest of your life. The Compound Effect—the positive results you want to experience in your life—will be the result of smart choices (and actions) repeated consistently over time. You win when you take the right steps day in and day out. But you set yourself up for failure by doing too much too soon.”

This is in regards to the last blog/podcast.  When you’re in marriage, you’re going to have to do things way outside the box.  Do things that you would have never done before.  Surprise him/her.  Buy those plane tickets to a utopia.  If you don’t do these things, relationships become stagnant.  The two individuals begin dying rather than growing together.

Story of Richard In The Podcast

The Power of Consistency

I looked back on my blogs from last year, and I noticed that were was a stray of days that I didn’t do a blog.  My numbers suffered; viewers disengaged; and the Big Mo was gone.  Not only that, but when you fall out of that consistency “frequency,” it’s even harder to get back in as you’ve heard in Richard’s story.

People, at the beginning of the year, hire a personal trainer to bust their ass, and they ultimately fall into that same bad habit.

Another example would be students here in Thailand.  I’ve seen students who have an insane amount of discipline, and I’ve seen others who study English for the sake of learning the language.  That’s the wrong way to do it.

For example, let’s say I had a student by the name of Note.  Note was very good at conversation and I asked him, “how did you learn conversation?” He said, “I repeated everything I heard in movies and I talk to myself in the mirror.”

About 99% of the human population wouldn’t do that because they’re scared of what “others” might think of them.

Example number 2 — Kim Kim.  Kim Kim, at the age of 15, spoke better than most Asians all across Asia.  Her accent is sound and she has very few grammatical errors while speaking.  How did she learn? Just like my companion 11-years-ago by the name of Ezra Goings did — surround yourself with the language.

“I love English.  English is life.  I breathe it. I love it so much.  I hate Thai.”

That’s what she said. She hates her own language.  She actually even speaks to children and others in the community in English, which is funny because she says “excuse me” with a stern voice.  What are the reactions? Looks of awe.

I hope you understand what point I’m trying to make here.  Through consistency, riding the Big Mo, and unrelenting determination can come some of the greatest lessons and learning experiences in life.  It’s not always about taking a massive jump and pushing down on the pump as quick as possible.  Look at rowers — you know — the people who pedal like hell in lakes while sitting in canoes.  Could you imagine if they went as fast as possible at the beginning of the race? They would die down.

Other examples could be like the “beauty pill,” which is sold here in Thailand.  Women, of all walks of life, take this pill (which is extremely dangerous) so they can lose weight.  They don’t want to put in the work in the gym…they just want to “become” slim.  Discipline is the lesson.

Podcast

https://www.spreaker.com/user/thearseniobuckshow/rhythms-of-life-power-of-consistency

 

Darren Hardy: Daily Rhythms & Registering Them + Relationships

Preston Smiles fits “fun-time” into his clients’ schedules.

What’s fun-time?

It’s simply when an alarm goes off, that particular individual drops everything he or she is doing and they dance their tail off.  I know, odd as hell, but the incorporation of that, or any other behavior, forms a discipline.

Remember I talked to you about Romanic Relationships and how spontaneity would go a long way in any relationship? Look at it this way…

Darren Hardy, at 6pm, has something called “date night” with his wife.  So when the time arrives, the alarms go off on his spouse and his phone, they drop everything, and they commit to being with each other from sundown — all the way to sunup.  This is from Friday night to Sunday morning, too.  Not just one day.

He also used an idea from Jack Canfield’s ‘Success Principles’ book, which he asks his wife, “how would you rate the relationship for this past week?” Of course the wife would give him a number, and he would then ask, “how can I get better?”  The wife will then come up with a list of things that will help him become better.

No one is perfect.  Just remember that.  It would be so overwhelming hearing nagging (which it shouldn’t be – but totally can be) all the time.  For example, when I was recently dating a girl, she wouldn’t ask me something like this; nor would I ask her the question.  Instead, on a two-hour trip back from Kanchanaburi to Bangkok, she was complaining her head off because I didn’t ask her if she wanted anything from 7-11, and because I didn’t carry all four pieces of luggage.

This should be a feeling of validation for both parties.

“Every month, Georgia and I also schedule something unique and memorable. Jim Rohn taught me that life is simply a collection of experiences; our goal should be to increase the frequency and the intensity of the good experiences. Once a month we try to do something that creates an experience that has some memorable intensity. It could be driving up to the mountains, going on an adventurous hike, driving up to Los Angeles to try a new fancy restaurant, going sailing in the bay—whatever. Something out of the ordinary that has a heightened experience and creates an indelible memory.”

“Once a quarter we plan a two- to three-day getaway. I like to do a quarterly review of all my goals and life patterns, and this is a great time to do a deeper check-in on how things are going in our relationship. Then we have our special travel vacation, plus our holiday traditions and our New Year’s hike and goal-setting ritual. You can see that once all this is scheduled, you no longer have to think about what you need to be doing. Everything happens naturally. We’ve created a rhythm that gives us momentum.” – Darren Hardy

Weekly Rhythm Registration In Podcast + PDF

Registering Rhythms Example