Interviewee #19: Best-Selling Author Tiffany Okafor & Shifting The Mindsets of Millennials

Tiffany Okafor is a best-selling author, inspirational speaker and mindset mentor based in Los Angeles, CA. As a speaker and mindset mentor, she takes a no-nonsense approach to helping millennials shift their mindsets so that they can lead happier and more peaceful lives. Her best-selling book, BITCHY, provides an even deeper insight into the techniques she believes will allow us all to dive deeper in love with ourselves and achieve success in all areas. BITCHY is currently available on Amazon: http://amzn.to/2EdXOkM.

Get in touch with Tiffany Okafor from California, Los Angeles

– Mindset Coach.

https://www.spreaker.com/user/thearseniobuckshow/interviewee-19-best-selling-author-tiffa

Links:

 

Things we discussed:

  • Introduction of Tiffany and what she do?
  • When did Tiffany start on personal development?
  • What Millennials are battling now?
  • Journaling is a way to write your thoughts to understand who you really are.
  • What about fear? What really makes Millennials fearful?
  • How can Millennials overcome fear?
  • How to be yourself (b*tch)?
  • Being a b*tch is all about being honest.
  • When did you develop self-awareness? How did it happen?
  • How do you apply the Law of Attraction?
  • You have the power to control your sanity.
  • What is your morning routine like?
  • What are some personal development books for easy reading that you will recommend to potential readers?
  • You need to confront your past and be forgiving.
  • What is Tiffany’s biggest failure.
  • Stop focusing on negative energy; the power of perception.
  • What is the ultimate purpose of Tiffany Okafor to the world?
  • Connecting with Tiffany Okafor.

 

Thank you for listening!

 

Thank you so much for joining me for this podcast. Please do write down some feedbacks and comments. Please do share this podcast to your social media.

 

Links:

 

Season 1: Episode 4 – Book Review – Material & Sexual Mask

Let me first ask you some questions.

  • Are you driven to a country because of sexual activities?
  • Do you want to buy a car because of your insecurities?
  • Does having a big house mean more to you than making a difference?

Those are the most basic questions in terms of these masks.  From the sex tourists that have made Thailand the number 1 tourist destination on the planet as of 2017 (ok, not all are, but a significant portion of that 20 million came here to engage in sexual interaction), to the high society who lavish themselves in luxuries to cover-up what’s really wrong underneath their skin.

Welcome to the two most vicious masks of society (as most of them are).

Ok, maybe the material mask relates to women more than men, but if you put the #entrepreneurship hashtag in on Instagram, you will see a lot of men wearing super expensive suits (rented), wearing fancy watches (also rented) while standing in front of planes (jumping over fences to get to them) or standing in front of cars (without the license plate pictured).  Yes, I’m calling out the Laguna boys who seemingly lost all perspective in terms of living.

Shows such as Jersey Shore made it much worse when it was all about body-building, money and the latest trends.  This goes for both men and women.

Lewis Howes, at the time of writing the book, was sitting in a massive mansion in Beverly Hills.  This mansion was owned by one of the most polarizing characters (and still is) by the name of Tai Lopez.  Yes, the man who spouted “KNAWLEDDDGEEE” all over the net, preaching to people about the “good” life on a Ted Talk stage, and someone who would constantly show his materials.  He also went on to say, “these materials don’t mean anything,” but it’s a selling point for you to get those weak-minded individuals into buying your courses?

Anywho, this is a man who’s hampered by the media-crazy materialistic America.

“The irony is, for so many people, all that materialism invalidates the quality of a person’s ideas. There’s nothing Tai can do to get those people to hear him, which just drives him further behind the Material Mask. It’s like someone trying to convince you that they care about you by screaming, “I love you!” louder and louder right in your face at the top of their lungs with the veins bulging out of their neck. You don’t hear the words; you only see the vulgar display.”

Excerpt From: Lewis Howes. “The Mask of Masculinity.” iBooks.

What’s available if you drop the mask?

Fulfillment
Worthiness
Inner peace
Attracting people who are interested in who you are, not how much you have
Feeling enough
Satisfaction with your achievements
Gratitude

 

Sexual Mask

I worked at a job in Pathumthani, Thailand who had about 13 anglo teachers (the emphasis is coming), all of which who escaped a terrible divorce, got shunned by their own children (who no longer speak to them) and ended up seeking refuge by marrying a poor woman from a village.  This is the story of the over 45s here in Thailand.

Ok, those are wife-tourists.

Let’s put some focus on the sex monsters.

 

Who You Have To Become & Behaving Yourself + Exercise

It’s been a couple days since my last blog, and my goodness, I’ve never felt so out of place and out-of-touch with my fellow readers from all over the world! It’s time to get back into the compound effect.

All right, let’s map out the goals that you’ve decided upon.  Just remember that the only thing that stands between you and your goal is your behavior.

Example, the universe loves ACTION!

If I had put off moving into my new condominium, the dream job, which fell into my lap just yesterday, would’ve never happened! I knew I needed to act and it was all predicated on my behavior.  That morning I emailed four different condominiums probably decided this entire process.  My mind and everything is already set in Bangkok.  If I didn’t start by taking the first necessary step, the opportunity would’ve never come.

What do you need to start doing to change your trajectory so that it’s headed in the most beneficial direction? In other words, what habits and behaviors do you need to subtract from and add to your life?

Your life comes down to this formula:

Choice + Behavior + Habit + Compounded = Goals

decision +  action +  repeated action + time

Which behaviors are blocking your life right now?

How many hours of T.V. do you watch everyday? Seriously, I can bet good money you don’t know.  Do you sit in front of the television and watch 2-3 hours of sports (minimal) per weekend when you can be planning out your entire next week and even meals?

How many cans of soda do you drink a day? How many ridiculous YouTube videos do you watch that’s nonessential to the work you’re in? How about drama? Human beings LOVE drama and gossip.  Americans love the reality TV and Thailand/Korea love drama.  Become aware of how you’re behaving is the most important part of this process.  That’s step #1.

Okay, now it’s your turn. Get out your little notebook and write out your top three goals. Now make a list of the bad habits that might be sabotaging your progress in each area. Write down every one.

Habits and behaviors never lie. If there’s a discrepancy between what you say and what you do, I’m going to believe what you do every time. If you tell me you want to be healthy, but you’ve got Doritos dust on your fingers, I’m believing the Doritos. If you say self-improvement is a priority, but you spend more time with your Xbox than at the library, I’m believing the Xbox. If you say you’re a dedicated professional, but you show up late and unprepared, your behavior rats you out every time. You say your family is your top priority, but if they don’t appear on your busy calendar, they aren’t, really. Look at the list of bad habits you just made. That’s the truth about who you are. Now you get to decide whether that’s okay, or if you want to change.

Next, add to that list all the habits you need to adopt that, practiced and compounded over time, will result in you gloriously achieving your goals.

Making this list isn’t about wasting energy by getting judgmental and regretful. It’s about taking a clear-headed look at what you want to improve. I’m not going to leave you there, however. Let’s uproot those sabotaging bad habits and plant new, positive, and healthy ones in their place.”

Podcast

Napoleon Hill – Imagination: Part 2

“If your imagination is the mirror of your soul, then you have a perfect right to stand before that mirror and see yourself as you wish to be.  You have the right to see reflected in that magic mirror the mansion you intend to own, the factory you intend to manage, the bank of which you intend to be president, the station in life you intend to occupy.  Your imagination belongs to you! Use it! The more you use it the more efficiently it will serve you.” – Napoleon Hill

A man of imagination went to a city long ago to make money out of real estate.  He got an option on a couple of hills that were unsuitable for real estate due to the steepness of them.  He also had another option on the ground that was unsuitable for use because of the back-water that covered it daily.  So, in the end, he secured both of the options for super cheap because the literal mind thought both didn’t have any substantial value.

However, with a few tons of explosives, he turned those steep hills into loose dirt.  With the aid of some tractors and road scrapers, he used the ground for beautiful building lots.  Also, with the help of cattle and livestock, he dumped the surplus of dirt on the low ground and raised it above the water level, thereby turning it into beautiful building lots.

He made a substantial fortune, for what?

For removing some dirt from where it was not needed to where it was needed! For mixing some useless dirt with imagination.

Another story would be a man purchasing land on top of a hill.  This man was dirt cheap and the owner of the land was selling it for little-to-nothing, just because the imagination with the man selling it wasn’t there.  So, this man, who barely had any money to his name, purchased that piece of land and built a log cabin that became very profitable because the view of both sides of the mountain.  Later, it turned into a half dozen.  Then, he built a minimart and a few other things to accompany it.  That man amassed a FORTUNE over just pennies by using his imagination.

If you properly use your imagination it will help you convert your failures and mistakes into assets of priceless value; it will lead you to discovery of a truth known only to those who use their imagination; namely, that the greatest reverses and misfortunes of life often open the door to golden opportunities.

You will never know what is your capacity for achievement until you learn how to mix your efforts with imagination.  The products of your hands, minus imagination, will yield you but a small return, but those selfsame hands, when properly guided by imagination, can be made to earn you all the material wealth you can use.

Podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/episode/12076820

Jack Canfield -How Much, By When?

Bob Proctor once asked a gentleman during an interview more than 30 years old, “how much money do you want?”

He replied, “a lot?”

“That’s not measurable.  That’s not a number.  You’re not specific so the universe has no idea how much “a lot” is.”

To make sure a goal releases the power of your subconscious mind, it must meet two criteria: how much (some measurable quantity such as pages, pounds, dollars, square feet, points) and by when (a specific time or date).

“I will have a six pack.”  That’s not as measurable as “I will have a six pack by the end of the month.”

The time and date is the most important because giving that specific aspect of your goals lets just say expedites it.  Include every little details about the goal you want to achieve.  The color, size, features, etc.  The more vague you are, the more vague the results are.

Jack Canfield also held a seminar whereas this lady specifically said, “I want a lot of money.” So he (acting as a universe) gave her a dollar.  She said, “I want more.”  He gave her an extra quarter and said, “is this enough?”

“No.  I want more!”

“Well be more specific,” he said.

A Goal Versus A Good Idea

Here’s a few examples on how to engage your subconscious mind, a goal or objective.

  • Good Idea

I would like to own a nice home on the ocean.

I want to lose weight.

I need to treat my employees better.

  • Goal or Objective

I will own a condominium in Pattaya oceanside on the 37th floor just outside Jomtien beach.

I will lose 5 pounds by April 15th, 2017.

I will give 25$ bonuses to each employees at the end of the month when all tasks are met.  If they complete more than what they’re paid to do, I’ll add on a vacation day.

The specificity that comes along with goal setting needs to be vivid.  Example, if you want a home, write down the location, landscaping, furniture, artwork, sound system, floor plan.  If you don’t have an idea, go on houzz.com.  They have such a wide variety of perks for home decor.

When you write it all down, your subconscious mind will know what to work on.  It will know which opportunities to home in on to help you reach goal.

When you create your goals, be sure to write down some big ones that will stretch you and require you to grow to achieve them.  It’s a good thing to have some goals that make you a little uncomfortable.  Why?  Because the ultimate goal, in addition to achieving your material goals, is to become a master at life.  And to do this, you will need to learn new skills, expand your vision of what’s possible, build new relationships, and learn to overcome your fears, considerations, and roadblocks.