The Emotional Bank Account Course is Officially LIVE!

So, after my blog has gotten a significant amount of views over the years (as well as podcast plays), I’ve finally put together a video course to teach everyone about The Emotional Bank account.  With loads of actionable items, this could be your introduction into personal development/self-improvement.  Because we’re always engaged in communication, whether it’s family & friends, colleagues, etc…we’re unaware of the emotional damage we may be causing because of our continual withdrawals.  In this course, there are six sub-areas you’re going to learn and build on. 

  • Understanding The Individual
  • Attending to The Little Things
  • Keeping Commitments
  • Clarifying Expectations
  • Showing Personal Integrity
  • Apologizing Sincerely When You Make a Withdrawal

At the completion of this course and with the actionable steps at the conclusion of each video, you will begin to take significant strides in putting more into your daily relationships. 

The Emotional Bank Account

Arsenio’s ESL Podcast: Katarina Gleisberg on Communication in the Classroom

Another brilliant podcast with one of my favorite people in the world! Katarina Gleisberg, teacher from North Dakota, has come back onto my podcast today to deliver bombs of glory for both teachers and students. Here’s the podcast, YouTube video, and full transcript!

Podcast

YouTube

Hi guys, welcome back to another ESL podcast. Welcome back to another wonderful life that we’re going to be doing. Well, not necessarily alive, but it’s going to be on youtube and podcast. One day I got the wondrous and the one n do leak, a treat, a Glassberg here with them again, and we’re going to be going over some wonderful topics. So thank you so much for coming on Katrina. Thank you for having me again. Absolutely. So there were some things, man, we had a kind of touch up on some things, so we need to go over. Okay, let’s first go over the first topic. Okay. So we had some Q and a. Some things that of course I discussed in the past. I’ve sent you some messages in regards to some disheartening conversations I’ve had with students. I remember at the end of May I was teaching a class and some of the students at the very end they said, teacher, we already know how to speak English.
 
We want to learn grammar because grammar will help us at university and et Cetera, et Cetera, et cetera. And I’m like, wait, what? What are they talking about? And it’s really, it was really sad because after class had finished, I went with one of the students who were on my side in a taxi and we went all the way down this long road, a long road. And it, the conversation, it was very bad and I was like, dude, I’m not going to be able to, of course, survive at this particular school. So yeah, that’s one thing I want to talk about. Conversation and grammar. How does it tie in? And I mean, I just don’t understand how someone in a non-native English speaking country would much rather learn something outside of conversation then, you know, the conversation itself. So I’m gonna let you take it away now.
 
Well, I feel like that mentality shows,
 
yeah.
 
What is valued in that person’s education setting? Right. So I come from a background of, in Grad school, we’re taught from the get-go and our language teaching program that all lessons should have a balance of reading, writing, speaking and listening. Those are the four domains of language learning. No matter if it’s your native language or a foreign language, those are the four domains and you have to have that integrative approach or your, um, things are not going to tie together and you’re not going to learn as quickly or effectively. So I would imagine in a context like that, it must, I’m assuming you’re, that student probably grew up low. Their version of language learning was very old school with a grammar worksheet.
 
And so I mean, grammar worksheets and how grammar, learning, grammar out of context. So remember we talked about grammar in context, vocabulary in context, learning grammar by worksheets alone. It’s not very effective, is it?
 
Ah, it is not. I always thought that the easiest way to teach grammar was through someone’s writing. Have them start with jotting down what they do know and then we can teach through their own words because of their own message. We are egocentric people, right? We learned from our own situations. When I, I remember as a kid having those grammar worksheets where each sentence is about a new person and I have a totally isolated topic. It’s not interesting, but we learn more from ourselves. Right? So I always start with a piece of writing if possible. Right? But as we said, language learning is an integrative approach. And I would assume that most students have this goal of learning English so that they can communicate because their sole English language learning isn’t always going to be writing papers and taking tests. Most people when they learn a language that ultimate goal is, oh, I want to be able to communicate with native speakers. I want to be able to travel and use all these language skills I worked so hard to acquire. And Gosh, when you’re doing conversation in class, that’s so important for the students because they can notice whatever that grammar topic is that they have learned. It’s so much more powerful when they have that reinforced and a natural conversation out in public.
 
Right. And that ties into exactly what I was telling you right before we, I actually clicked record on here and it’s the story in regards to what I had experienced over the last week. Um, and it’s about like particular areas of Bangkok. They’re very, very interested in one place over here would be completely different from another place to just 10 kilometres outside, right. Or like five miles down the road. And so here I am on a Thursday evening, I remember I was sitting down, I had this girl Wa this lady walk in and I asked her what her name was and she said, Lynn. And then I looked at, of course, the manifests and she was Chinese and I’m like, this is going to be interesting because now I had someone from native China who’s in my classroom, boom, another one comes in who I had already met probably a few weeks prior to that.
 
And she walked in. And so now I have two Chinese students. They’re the first ones that were there. And then after that, I had four other Thai individuals come in. And so with communication in the classroom, I’m going to give you an example. So on a Sunday at about 10:00 AM a lot of my students, they are just so hard for them to communicate openly, you know, openly to one another. They’re just like a deer in headlights. They just stare at me like this. I mean it doesn’t matter how animated I am. It doesn’t matter what I do over here, over there, it’s just they have that same look on their face except one. If that one wasn’t in there, this will be one of the most difficult classes to teach even though there are seven students. However,
 
going back to the chain, you know the two Chinese students with the four Thai students, these two students and able the Thai students and make them speak English because one always turns to the lady and asks her because she doesn’t speak Thai. And I’m like, oh this is good. So she asks her everything in English. The other lady over here speaks to the other one in English show, everyone is communicating in English. So while I’m on break, I’m listening to the conversations that are happening and everything is in English, which is unheard of in this country. So having, you know, a variety of different people from different nationalities in the classroom will enable that type of communication. So when we talk about communication in the classroom, what is it that you know, what is it that you are speaking about?
 
So first of all, I love that you pointed that out, that when you have people in a class of many different nationalities, it benefits everyone. Because I had that in Greece, in my classroom where I had students with 16 different native languages. Wow. Right? So if the students from China wanted to communicate with the students from Greece and the students from Israel, they were using English. That was the link, Lingua Franca. So, oh my gosh, you what a blessing to have that great diversity because these students are seeing for themselves how important it is for a lot of people. You know, even take us growing up in the United States and we’re in a middle school or high school, let’s say Spanish or French class, right? We’re all with native English speakers. And when we learn these Spanish concepts, we’re able to ask, so ask all of our questions in English. Right? But that doesn’t give us the experience of asking a question in Spanish. And so then when I studied in Mexico, in college, I didn’t have that firsthand experience of asking questions in Spanish. But it’s so important. That brings up that important concept of ask for help. Ask for help. Right. Your, your students have an advantage.
 
And so man, okay, so when you talked about 16 nationalities in Greece, what is it that you would do in your classrooms to like say, okay, I’m going to take everyone out of their comfort zone because of course Chinese would stick with the Chinese. This was stick with this. They said all the nationalities, they have a tendency of going back to what they are comfortable with. So are there things, would you say? Okay. All right. One, two, three, four. What? Okay. Line them up. Okay. These are the nationalities. Okay. You, you’re from this country, you hear, you hear you here. What is it that, um, you would do in your classroom to enable that type of communication?
 
Okay, so many, many things. Um, first of all,
 
oh, where do you even start? Visuals are so important to pull up things on the screen. If we’re talking about something such as, um, even with my beginning learners, we would read books together and um, we picture books, but even chapter books and whatever the words were from the story that I knew was going to be coming up that day. So let’s say, Oh, I love the book because of Winn-Dixie for example. Okay. There are words in there my students aren’t familiar with. Right. My students had never tasted peanut butter, so I literally am bringing up, if they’re talking about food in the book, I literally have on the screen, I have pictures of the food that’s referenced in that book. Picture of tomatoes, macaroni and cheese, rice, peanut butter, pickles, you name it. Because by pictures everybody can relate to that. And then as they’re taking notes, I encourage pictures all the time.
 
I also would print out graphic organizers and have them do note taking on graphic organizers or diagrams, right? So some kids, as we’re talking about the word peanut butter, they’re literally in their notebook. They’re drawing a picture of a jar of peanut butter and they’re drawing a picture of the peanut butter sandwich. So they can remember. So I, I always do visuals and I do actions. It was amazing to me how you can gauge comprehension from ways other than speaking because I had, I was probably several weeks into the book because of Winn Dixie that I was doing with second graders and I go through it really, really slow. Even if we get through two pages a day, that is something because it is quality over quantity. Right. And so we would do graphic organizers. Where were you and write a sentence or two, a lot of picture drawing,
 
but a couple of weeks in the book we had parent-teacher conferences and I asked this second-grade student, this girl from China to explain to her mother what the book was about. Granted, the mother does not speak English, the mother only speaks Chinese. This little girl got down on the floor. It was acting like a dog was acting out the whole first scene of the book where the dogs making a mess and are knocking produce all over the floor of the grocery store. And I was like, this is what it’s all about. You use pictures, you use actions. The kids remember this.
 
Wow, that’s awesome. I can’t imagine. I can’t imagine that seeing, you know, like the mother just sitting there like, what did you do with this? She’s not,
 
I feel lucky wildly in Chinese and I was like, yes, this girl has the comprehension. She may not be able to explain it to me in English yet, but she has it down because this little girl’s drawings match the scenes from the book. She was labelling things with the character names and the settings and so it doesn’t have to start with complete sentences. It can start with those things such as character names, locations and vocabulary from the book. Eventually, they will string it along into sentences and because everybody loves the book because of Winn-Dixie, it was amazing how they were. I would pose a question or we would start each day with summarizing what we had read the day before and you have these kids, you have the kid with the first language of Chinese speaking with the kids, the first language of Greek and the kid. The first language of from Israel’s talking to the girl who speaks Hungarian and it’s because they’re all invested in, they want to be able to converse.
 
So yes, just start with pictures, not the grammar worksheets. Right, and you start with a longer book, like a chapter book. Even if you think it’s overwhelming. Well, everything consists of baby steps, babysits, baby steps. Like I said, two pages of a chapter book. These kids are so engaged and invested in this book, they want to know what happens, right? So it gives it, the benefit for me as a teacher is that the kids already have that attention where they are just so interested to know what is going to happen next today with this four dog.
 
Wow. That’s just amazing. You know what? You touched upon that little area that I was going to ask you a question like the first day of school, how was the classroom like everyone sat down, you’ve got all these different nationalities. What kind of body language did you see amongst the students like and how? How can some of these international students or students who are very sighted speak English overcome that? Because again, first days are always the most difficult. But what did you see from some people? Did you see some people of this nationality? Let’s say Israelian you know, they were like, hey, you know what, I’m more outgoing then this over here, then over there, like what? Like, like what you see? I know that was it just then
 
I, I literally had my, Ah, the first day that I had first graders, there were kids crying. Oh, they already have separation anxiety and nets being scared if I’m in a new school with this new language and there were kids crying. Um, I was bitten by a kid named tiger. Okay. Is that his first day? Is that a nickname or? Well, cause it fits. It fits perfectly. Just try to rip you off. Where was he from? America was that from America. He had to be from America, this, this and, and I realized soon after, um, this act kit actually became one of my favourites. He was just really scared. Um, he was from China and tiger was his nickname, but I’m like, oh my gosh, the first day of school, I’m by a tiger. So what happened? You set like [inaudible] you know, all that craziness or he just didn’t want to be told. No, but that’s why as a teacher, you know, part of front-loading is at the beginning of the school year, classroom management, you front load, right? You okay spend so much more time on the rules and the expectations. And I’m talking about things like respect and coming up with a list of classroom norms.
 
And it just took a while with the younger ones. It took a while because those younger ones didn’t already have education in their native language to know how to even act in a classroom. So then when you put them in a classroom where it’s a language that they’re not familiar with, it makes it even scarier. Um, so we just start with easy things, like everyone’s decorating a name tag, uh, you know, and they’re picking something that they like. So I have objects, right? So it might be plastic animals or something and something that I can have them speak about. Even if it’s like this is a tiger, you have to start somewhere. Um, what about the oldest students? Like the refugees, you teach and stuff like that? Would they just come into the classroom and they were just very, very free? I have a feeling that they were very free to, you know, like free-flowing communication within a classroom setting.
 
Like if I think of my adults, refugees learning English here in us okay. Um, depending on what culture they come from. Right. Some culture more reserved, some cultures are more about speaking and listening. Um, some of them are very timid to speak at first. So I just start with sentence frames. And so anytime I would have a brand new student enter that day, we’d pause whatever that was on the lesson plan. And I would have every single person in the classroom respond to the same speaking first. So my name is blank, I am from blank or because a lot of them have lived in many countries. I have lived in the following countries, I speak the following languages and my favourite activities are and things like activities. Those are things I already have in Google docs or PowerPoint slides that I can project.
 
So if they don’t know how to say something, there’s at least one activity they can point to like swimming, cooking, reading, whatever it is. And starting with pictures always helps because I can, the understanding is there they point to a picture of swimming and I can literally guide them with I like to swim, Bam. And then I let whoever is the new student start or go last if they so choose. Um, some of them want to go right away and that way they’ve already seen everybody else in the class model. This is what we do. We write down the sentence frame, we fill it in as the teacher is circulating amongst the students. It is, this is a safe place to ask for help.
 
Hmm. Nan, I love that. In a safe place, let’s, especially because a lot of people are scared to ask for help. And so, oh, that’s really, you know what I was, um, over the last week, man, I’ve done like, like three workshops. It’s been bananas. You know what I did when I had a big manufacturing company named Kubota out here in Thailand, and communication was our, you know, it was our main theme. It was called foodie goodies. So emotional reaction towards food, which of course all of us can relate to. And so the thing is, I was teaching it with another teacher and he was the head, I was the one over here, you know, I was doing other things in terms of pronunciation and the mechanics of the language. Um, but he would speak in Thai, but he would also speak in English. And then I would also put things into context with English.
 
So of course, if you look at some of the big, uh, popular people out here in Thailand, um, they, let’s just say a guy from Utah, right? He speaks perfect Tai, but he teaches English through the Thai language. I don’t necessarily, first I’m going to stop it there before getting back into the company. What do you think about that? Because communication in the classroom, when you are speaking, let’s say if I go to China and I speak Chinese, if I start speaking Chinese, Mandarin or Cantonese, whatever it may be, Cantonese for Hong Kong, Mandarin for native China. If I started speaking mandarin to the Chinese students, they’re going to fall back into that comfortable slab and I mean it’s just the piece, the purpose of learning English, I believe. Do you know? So I don’t know. And it’s really weird because then you bring an Asian American to a job.
 
I used to teach at, his name was, I don’t know, but he was, he, his blood comes from or somewhere around in Southeast Asia, but they would say, hey, just don’t say your tie. Okay. Because they’ll start speaking to you in Thai. And I’m like, but yet these other teachers speak fluent high and they speak it in the classroom. There’s so much crazy that’s happening. My question is if you are a teacher if I go to Mexico and I speak fluent Spanish and I teach my students English to Spanish, is that good or is that bad?
 
I feel like it needs to be a mix. Okay. No, um, you know, for example, I took five years of French from eighth grade to 12th grade and there are these phrases that that stick in my head, um, as far as questions that we were expected to ask. And I think about that, I think about those questions and the basic phrases. That’s why they stuck in my head is because I’ve heard them repeatedly. So when I relate, when I was able to relate that to my own students, if, especially the little ones, it’s like if they wanted, if the first graders wanted to go to the bathroom, I would have them. The rule was, you have to ask me an English first. Can I go to the bathroom, please? Because they learn that way and then they, they’re learning not just that sentence, but they’re learning a sentence frame of, oh, these are question words.
 
They’re learning the word, please. I, that’s a requirement in my classroom, you will use please, you will not order me around. I wouldn’t have, I would have students, adults included that would tell me. They would come up to me and they’d say, I need a pencil. I need paper. And I’d be like, oh, it sounds much more polite. If you phrase it as a question, can I have a pencil? Lee’s, when you use manners, people are going to be much more willing to help you. So that mixed waste so important. So when we’re talking about how, how grateful we are to have these mixes of students with different native languages, it is so amazing because I am not opposed to having students have the same native language, use their native language to help each other understand vocabulary. But at the same time, you know, with my refugees, students in a classroom setting where they’re learning English in the United States, if I have students from 16 different native languages, I, there’s no way for me to know everybody’s language. So there they’re going to have to pick up on all of these important nonverbal cues and inferencing skills. So they’re noticing, okay, these are the gestures she’s using. This is her expression of voice that’s going up and down. And
 
if I, if I didn’t, if I was just speaking to those people in their native language, they wouldn’t be noticing these nonverbals as much. They wouldn’t be noticing all of these inferencing skills of how you can figure out a vocabulary word based on context. That’s so important. Yes, there. Believe me, there’s been plenty of times where it would have been really helpful if I knew every single student’s native language, so I could explain something when they were confused. But you know what? That they have had valuable learning opportunities from us figuring out these complicated misunderstandings. It’s so, it’s so valuable.
 
And so like, I’m interested because what is it you teach in first grade is kind of relates to me teaching the kingdom goodness at my very first job in 2013 right. And I remember I had a teacher and she shouldn’t assistant and I had a headteacher in there. Uh, not in the other, I forgot the other girl’s name, but yeah. So they would tell me, oh, make sure you speak to the children. Slowly do this, do that. And I remember in a class of just 10 students, it was a private school, right? These students change so quickly. Within four months. I remember specifically there was a kid named punk Kang and pompom. That was his nickname, right? And his mother gives speak English, right? Gritty pretty well, like, like upper intermediate level. Um, and I remember I was speaking of Pong Pong one day and he was, he was pretty good at conversation like right here.
 
And everyone else was below him. Another girl named Punk Pun, she was excellent at writing. This girl was excellent at all skills. So why try meshing everything together and had the, you know, collaborating within three months, pong pong ended up speaking fluent English to me and I was like, Whoa, Whoa, whoa, Whoa, whoa. Like there was a girl screaming and crying at lunchtime. Right? And I remember he turned around to me and he said, teacher, this girl is really freaking me out right now. Perfect English. I started screaming into laughter. Okay. And I was like, what’s going on? And so I talked to his mom. I said, your son pretty much speaks English right now. What does he do? She’s like, oh well he plays Minecraft all day. And I’m like, aw. That’s where he gets the bad language from too. So how do you encourage people
 
like you know, at smaller, you know, young ages or older ages to learn English outside of the classroom? That’s something really, really good. Right? You know what? I have had several adult students who tell me when they already come to this country and they’re not in the beginning class. They’re in my class who tell me things like, um, I learned English from watching youtube videos from video games, from singing karaoke. Okay. Okay. Okay. From Facebook, they would see memes and stuff and they would want to understand them. So, okay. When people want to learn badly enough, they will, they will figure out ways to learn. They want to watch an American TV program. I have several kids who said they’ve learned from cartoons, they’ve learned from comic books. So there are so many resources available. So many available
 
time was, you know what I mean?
 
Yes, yes. And so there are so many more resources available in English. When I was trying to learn Greek, it’s what, it’s not as easy for me in the United States to get my hands on Greek comic books, youtube videos, Karaoke like it is people and other countries getting English resources right. But use, use whatever works for me. I remember in other countries, yeah, like when I studied in Mexico when I was in college, turning on the TV and having a Disney movie con and if it’s a Disney movie I already am familiar with like Aladdin. Ah, I already know the context of the story. Now I’m watching it in another language. Hi. Especially children’s movies because they speak with more slowly and with simple language. If you and I have discussed in a previous podcast, children’s books, oh my gosh, I have adults who love children’s books just as much as the kids do. And the adults a lot of times want to learn so that they can read these books to their children. And so I will use some of the same strategies that I use with elementary students. Absolutely.
 
Wow. So when you were in cut, I love that. And that’s what I see sometimes. Like out here in Thailand, I see a lot of in tie with the Thai subtitles or this speaking tie. And it’s funny because I pick up a lot of things in the Thai language now. Like I could pick up the ideas. So I don’t listen so much for all the, you know, the unnecessary words. I try to listen for the main idea and I can pick it up pretty quickly. Okay. Not all of the time, like 30% of the time, I’m probably just a little bit wrong. But you being in Mexico, you learn in Spanish out there and whatnot. Give me an example. So who are the people that, how did you communicate, who was it that you communicated within the classrooms? And how about Golan around because you were a learner of also Greek, Spanish in Panama, Mexico, which are probably just a little bit different or maybe an immense of that different. Um, how was it that you learned communication in the classroom being, you know, a Spanish learner too? Because that’s very interesting.
 
What’s interesting is I feel like I learned more Spanish, not in the classroom, but because I was staying with a host family.
 
Yeah.
 
And the couple who I was staying with, Natalia and Kino, very gracious couple, they didn’t speak hardly any English. I went there knowing hardly any Spanish. We were doing a lot of charades and writing things down. And because I had taken, um, five years of French, I could understand, of course, like a lot of us, I can understand a lot more than I can actually produce. But because you’re in this situation where I’m in somebody’s home, she has just made me a four-course amazing meal. She wants to know what I think of it. Of course I the most, the majority of the feedback I’m giving her is nonverbal. But because I’m invested in this relationship, right, when you’re in that kind of a situation, it’s so motivating to learn quickly because you can bet your bottom dollar. I was looking up words, I was figuring out how to say exactly what I wanted to ask them. So one day I wanted to ask, um, how to walk to the mall. So you perfect situation of me doing my research. I’m trying to figure this out so then I can actually use my words and then I can be validated when I actually get the information that I want. And the host father is drawing out a map for me of how to get to them all.
 
So you asked about the classroom, but I tell you, it is those natural situations where I feel I learned so much more in the classroom. I was learning things like we normally learn first in a language learning class. My name is, I am blank years old. I am from a blank. But as I have found being both a students and being both a teacher, what people want to learn most is those how to get around, how to ask for
 
help, how to carry on with their daily activities. That’s called, yeah, since you wasted funnel, ageless or situational, fill in the blank. Do you know what I’ve made? Um, man, I had a couple of stories, but I think they just went right away. But I’m like, be here, be in here in Thailand. Would I learn Thai in the classroom? Absolutely not. I’m living in the country right now. You being in university, fantastic. Me, I was a teacher so I needed to learn. Okay, what are some of these, you know, these things that I need to learn, the basics? How can I go here? Go Straight, turn right, turn left. And you know what? These things are absolutely going to stick. No one will remember the last time we talked about the taxi and stuff a while back. Um, you know, knowing how to take a taxi, very important, telling him to turn on the meter. Very, very important. You know, so, um, Oh man, I’ve had a man, I had a couple of experiences but they all just went away cause I was so in tune. So anyway, so, okay. Um, oh my God, my ideas. I hate when my ideas go away. Those are some real,
 
it shows that you were being a mindful listener.
 
Yes. Because you taught me that. That’s right. You taught me that
 
great speech would say just take a deep breath. It’s okay. We don’t judge ourselves. If it’s important enough, it’ll come up later.
 
Right, right. It’s important enough. Right. Okay. So here we go. I want to give you, so of course, you being a learner of Spanish and Greek. Me being a learner of Thai, of course, living in a spitball, an English speaking household with a mother who speaks spoke both languages, both of course Spanish and English. Um, what are some ways communication in the classroom for students, for students out there around the world or for students in general? The students of life, because we are all students of life. Okay. If you’re out there in a community if they’re going to travel, how can they communicate more thoroughly, more effectively? What are the three simple ways that you know, people could do it both inside and outside the classroom? So
 
first of all, come to the classroom,
 
prepared with your questions,
 
because we always think of questions when we’re not in the classroom. And then we forget to write them down. And we don’t remember when we’re in the presence of a teacher. The first of all, write your questions down. Come to class with those questions. Teachers love receiving questions because that way they know what you’re interested in. I think I shared in a previous podcast something that I really, really wanted to learn and when I was in Greece, as I wanted to learn how to ask for help in a grocery store, I wanted to know how to order cheese. Um, and so that was a question that I, I came to class with and I asked my Greek teacher. So first of all, write your questions down. Don’t be afraid to ask those questions. Um, when you are in the classroom, notice patterns, questions, because those same patterns of questions are things that you can use throughout your knee.
 
A normal daily situation. So if I’m noticing a pattern of asking for cheese, asking for, um, chicken, asking for whatever, once I learned that one phrase of how to ask for cheese, I was noticing those same sentence patterns and other people’s speech. And so that those patterns are so important, whether it’s a sentence frame or whether it is noticing root words, um, and piecing those together. So your original question was strategies that people can use for conversation in the classroom and outside of the past, right? Yeah. So outside of the classroom, just like inside the classroom, not being afraid to ask questions, overcoming that fear. That’s it. Yes. And Yeah, we’ve, yeah, we’ve discussed this before about how, we may not know how to phrase an entire grammatically correct sentence, but we might know one word, just he was the one word. Use the one if you point, and even if it’s the word like I’ve done this before and I’m, I’m wanting to find the bank, I point and I’m like bank here, here and there. And then because you’re in this, this dire situation where you need to know this, you’re going to pick up more on the grammar of the bank is over here, tender it more next time. So, oh gosh, yes. Just asking the questions
 
right then. I love that so much. That’s a, you know, speaking from personal experience, that’s what I did, you know, live it out here in Thailand. I went like, like, do I know how to say banquet? Is it Tana Chat? So I would say a 10 of chat KTB which is who? Thai bank, basically the one that I normally teach at or the bank that I’m with. Right. So I would say, ah, try China to, to be united. Unite is my favourite word. Where, where, where, okay. I’m, Oh, what is it? Don’t they a, I don’t they last sweater. Right. Where’s the school? And I would just say the school name and BNI. Yeah. Denai or you and I, where is it? You see, I mean, so the basic question, where is the who, what, where, when, why, you know, um, and if it’s a very difficult question, uh, good luck. What about the difficult questions before I top this bad way off? Like how would you get over that? Like the real difficult questions.
 
So, um, can you give me an example of a really difficult question?
 
Uh, let’s say if you’re at the hospital, right? And I’m like, ah, I normally just go all hands. I’m like, ah, a jet meaning pain. Right. How do you say that in Spanish? Did I forget, don’t they? I don’t know, but yeah, I forgot. Uh, but yeah, we’ll say pain here or here or here, but there could also be a misdiagnosis. So how could someone go about learning question? Oh my God, I don’t know what I’m trying to say. But then, if so like conversation conversations or how can some, well, you know what, that’ll have to be in another podcast because we have to figure out how to build up those sentences to make them bigger and bigger. Such as, you know, your order in the cheese and then you realize that there was a little bit of a, you know, you could follow that same, you know, that saying, what am I trying to say? That, yeah, that same pattern. Yeah, no, in terms of this, in terms of that. So that’ll have to be another one. That could be a nice little
 
mines. This is why it’s so important to record things that happen in your everyday life. Because I remember in Greece, I was in an apartment where none of the neighbours spoke English. And I had a situate [inaudible] was, um, there was a leak in my ceiling. Right? And in your, in my regular Greek classes, it’s not like I ever learned how to say, um, my ceiling is leaking. So those were words I had to look up on my own. And then words to describe it of this is when it happens, this is how often it happens so that they know it’s not just a trickle here, trickle thereof, oh, it happens every morning at this time to help them figure out the root of the problem. Right. But those were words I had to look up on my own. And again, because, um, Google translator isn’t always grammatically correct. I had to start somewhere and I had to humble myself with, even if I didn’t have the perfect financiation, if it’s important enough, I’m going to ask about it in my very, very broken.
 
Great. Right? Oh Man. Awesome man. Uh, Katrina, the summit, the communications. I love that. I’m going to put those into little snippets. I’m going to have to tag you in that because those were some golden bombs for a lot of people. For non-native English speakers have a specific language, you know, pointing and being able to just build up, go from a word to a phrase and then from a phrase to a possible sentence, the questions and whatnot. Those were so, so good. So, oh my God, there are still so many other things to cover and I’m so excited like the vocabulary and whatnot. That’s going to be another very, very good one. But um, oh my God, Katrina, thank you so much, uh, for coming on to this wonderful podcasts and youtube video.
 
Thank you so much. I always enjoy this. You’ve come up with really good questions on the spot that makes me think
 
right. Yeah. And that’s what’s so great about it. Cause I don’t do like the 21 questions, stuff like that. It’s always because of personal experience, right? So, uh, so wait, so before we go, man, you’ve got to introduce what are your guys, so we had curious George odd yet. Uh, what was it the other time I bought Mr Eight, a man over there on your left, Mr Eight? Man, let’s talk to that guy over there. Who is he?
 
Well that, and that’s kind of just a generic word where it’s a character from a story. Okay. Interesting. Is next to the eight,
 
next to the eight is a house
 
next to the ape is a house. And also I’m a retro cabbage patch doll. Whoa. Um, yeah. But the students that I teach online, just love seeing props and it just happens that my mom saved a ton of my stuff for my childhood and when she moved, there were Rubbermaid bins in the basement of stuff that I didn’t even know she had kept, which is awesome. The House that’s here was from my, my dollhouse back in the day. Um, or no, my grandparents bought me for my fifth birthday and it comes with all of the little tikes people, props, whatever. And I use these all the time for teaching because it’s, um, I, I find that it’s very difficult for some English language learners to differentiate between him and her. So I owl, I almost always have props in my hands as I’m teaching. Sometimes they’ll say she for everything and I’ll be like, he,
 
I experienced that with some of my students out here too. Oh, in the cabbage patch doll. What did they invent? The cabbage patch dance. When did that come out? In the nineties. Was that before? Yeah, they kind of go like this, you know, they hold up their fist and they move it in like circles. It’s like the cavity
 
research when I was living overseas in the A’s wars and elementary school, well where we were kind of like cut off from American pop culture pre Internet. Wow. Um, but I know that cabbage patch dolls, even before I was born, were this one of those, you know how you always hear about the hot toy black Friday. We’re like, parents are fighting in the store for their kid. Right, right. You know that cabbage patch dolls some at some point in the 80s where that hot toy, but I had this, this bald baby cabbage patch in the late eighties when as I was a little toddler and then boom, it was just called bald baby and it never left my side.
 
Wow. [inaudible] bald baby. I love that ball baby. Oh my God. Oh Man. Well Ball Baby Kevin Scratch. Matt, it is a pleasure meeting you and thanks to you so much for joining me.
 
Oh, this one. Okay. Thank you so much for having me and thank you to all of your listeners who pose such awesome questions like these topics.
 
Right? Right. So that’s what you guys make sure again that you’re following. Now Katrina has rebranded herself into just Katrina Lights Berg. You could follow her of course on Instagram. You can follow her on the Facebook page. I tag her normally on my post, on my Facebook page and on Instagram. So you make sure that you look at the links that I have and the description of her. And again, Katrina bed. I would love to extend this, but it’s time to get my book. You would be on in the gym and enjoy this rain. Hopefully, the rain has stopped, but Matt, thank you so much again.
 
Thank you.
 
Welcome back, guys. With that being said, man, have a wonderful morning, afternoon and evening. If you’ve enjoyed this podcast, please share it like it. Leave a review, do whatever, and as you wish with this podcast, man, I’m just grateful that I have your ears. So again, guys, I hope you enjoyed this one and stay two for more because Katrina, and I think we just have so many topics. We’re just going to keep on coming and coming, so stay tuned for more. I’m your host, Arsenio as usual over now.

The Speed of Trust: Season 4 – Episode 1 -Low/High Trust Relationships

So, before we get into the basis of it all, let’s first try outline some of the frustrations we have on a daily basis.

  • I can’t stand the politics at work.  I feel sabotaged by my peers.  It seems like everyone is out for himself and will do anything to get ahead. 

  • I’ve really been burned in the past.  How can I ever trust anyone enough to have a real relationship?

  • I work in an organization that’s bogged down with bureaucracy.  It takes forever to get anything done.  I have to get authorization to buy a pencil!

  • The older my children get, the less they listen to me.  What can I do?

  • I feel like my contributions at work are hardly ever recognized or valued.  

  • I foolishly violated the trust of someone who was supremely important to me.  If I could hit “rewind” and make the decision differently, I would do it in a heartbeat. But I can’t.  Will I ever be able to rebuild the relationship?

  • I have to walk on eggshells at work.  If I say what I really think, I’ll get fired…or at least made irrelevant. 

  • My boss micromanages me and everyone else at work.  He treats us all like we can’t be trusted. 

  • With all the scandals, corruption, and ethical violations in our society today, I feel like someone has pulled the rug out from under me.  I don’t know what — or who — to trust anymore.  

In all of these situations, you CAN do something.  Look, you’ve heard the storm on a number of occasions in terms of what happened between my family and I.  I was the bigger man and decided to message my mother a couple years later.  Did she show any signs of gratitude when she got a message from me? No.  Furthermore, I messaged the siblings, whose relationships are beyond dilapidation, and there was no remorse.  There’s no way they can instill trust in me again and they would much rather have a bulk of anger.  That’s a decision that they will have to live with for the rest of their lives.  I TRIED doing something, but it takes two to tango at times.

SImply put, trust means confidence.  The opposite of trust is distrust and suspicious.

I want you to think right now of someone who you have a high-trust relationship with — perhaps a boss, coworker, parent, sibling, best friend.  What’s it like? How does it feel? How well do you communicate with them? How quickly can you get things done? How much do you enjoy this relationship?

Now

Think of a person with whom you have a low-trust relationship.  Again, it could be any of the nouns above.  How does it feel? How is the communication? Does it flow quickly and freely? Or do you feel like you’re constantly walking on landmines and being misunderstood? Do you enjoy this relationship? Or do you find it draining?

Podcast

 

Interviewee #16: Nasuha Sahaili On Branding, Power of Words, Communication & Compassion

LinkedIn, a platform I’ve gotten very serious on in the past, is full of unbelievable potential and entrepreneurial mindsets.  In today’s podcast, I was able to bring on a Malaysian-born entrepreneur who has a wonderful https://www.peachesnpen.com that focuses on the essential qualities of doing business — going back to the basics, which is the most essential.

The power of WORDS!

Podcast

Get in touch with Nasuha Sahaili of Malaysia

– About the power of branding, power of words, communication and compassion.

Links:

 

Things we discussed:

  • Introduction about her business.
  • What’s the core of their business?
  • Branding businesses with words.
  • What mistakes are the businesses in Kuala Lumpur making?
  • How to stand out from the crowd to make their businesses look more presentative?
  • How to look different in terms of value in the market?
  • How to look different in terms of words in a saturated market?
  • How do they reach their market for business goods and services in Kuala Lumpur?
  • The secret of traditional marketing in Kuala Lumpur due to their businesses are highly localised. Know your market and a sense of belonging.
  • The differences between B2C and B2B marketing can be different marketing methods.
  • How do you start your business with your company?
  • The purpose of expanding to Singapore by running a workshop.
  • How do you brand your startup in Kuala Lumpur?
  • How do you use words to bring a new product into another market?
  • The power of billboards advertising.
  • Knowing and understanding local markets.
  • Personal development books that change your life and skills. You need to brand your products and services on digital platforms by understanding and knowing your potential market and customers.
  • Trust is the ultimate weapon when you recruit your agents and drop-shippers. Word of mouth and referrals are real successful in marketing your brand.
  • When are words coming into the game? Brand marketing is all about building your foundation.
  • Branding marketing through digital platforms need to have the right words.
  • Being a good storyteller will be the key and essential to target your niche and the fundamental for brand loyalty.
  • How do they build a niche market and brand loyalty?
  • Brand essence is the fundamental principle, understand your customer and know your customer well.
  • What is your ultimate goal of your company?

 

Thank you for listening!

 

Thank you so much for joining me for this podcast. Please do write down some feedbacks and comments. Please do share this podcast to your social media.

 

Links:

 

How To Create A Band of Friends That Will Help Up-Level You

Set aside some time and make a list of people you would like to ask to mentor you.

  • Tony Robbins
  • Lisa Nichols
  • Gary Vee
  • Vishen Lakhiani
  • Tom Bilyeau
  • Les Brown
  • Michael Bernard Beckwith
  • Jim Kwik

It will probably seem daunting at first to contact people and ask for assistance, but it’s easier than you think.  Just recently I messaged Michael Bernard Beckwith to be on my podcast.  Was I scared? No, but it’s a win-win situation for me.  If he replies and we set something up, this will be ASTOUNDING for me; if he doesn’t reply, I still leave without anything.  See, win-win.

You know, when Les Brown started his speaking career in the early 1980’s, he approached Dr. Norman Vincent Peale (who was a world-renowned speaker and publisher).  Not only did Peale talk to Les, but he took him underneath his wings, too, teaching him everything he knew.

Les said, “he spoke more to my heart than to my mind.” Les Brown referred to this because there was a particular individual who said he would never be anything because he got held back + D’s and F’s in school.  However, Peale saw the greatness within Les.

Perhaps like the story above, you just need someone to open doors for you.  It could be someone from the social media platform called LinkedIn, or a friend who knows a friend, or just being around people who are high-energy.

I have mentors everywhere, and I don’t pay for them, either.  Let me tell you how I do it.

There’s a CEO of a crossfit-kinda-gym out here in Bangkok that I’m close to.  Not only am I close to him, but some of the other trainers.  I’ve always said before that “like attracts like,” and this is exactly what he has attracted to his business, which is extraordinary.  The array of personalities and position beings working for him and training is captivating.

So how do I learn from him? Just being around him and all the other trainers makes me incredibly enthusiastic about learning what they know.  He’s also a self-made millionaire, which is extremely rewarding because I’m literally within an arms length from an ultra-successful being.  And what’s more interesting is because he’s so happy and content with life, everyone else around him has that same persona.  Now, there are some people who workout in the gym that are bad energy.  I stay away from them.  However, in my little area right down the street from where I am, it’s team-oriented and so much fun going through absolute HELL.

What I’m trying to say is you don’t have to pay loads of dollars to get a mentor.  You can just pay a bit of a premium membership to get around people who are where you want to be.  If that’s moving to a particular area (while not busting the bank), or walking down the street of where some big shots walk down (like Napoleon Hill did) — that’s the gateway!

You’ll have to do some homework.  Look for mentors who have the kind of well-rounded experience you need to tackle your goal.  When you start seeing a pattern of the same few people being recommended, you know you’ve found that short list.

Also, asking someone who has already done it (because success leaves clues) is the best way to get to the next level.  Media agents, who talk to Gary Vee all the time, ask him “how can I build my own media agency?” It’s funny because Gary Vee always says that he wants his opponents to fail miserably, but that’s not the point.  The point is that he wants to dissect the mind of Gary Vee, just like I wanted to dissect the mind of one of my colleagues that knew so much about everything.

Network Your Way To Success

This could be in terms of mentorship or even just collaborating with others.  My first ever podcast interview was with a stylist and marketing executive from Dallas, Texas.  It took me 18 months to do my first interview.  Since that interview I’ve done 9 others (5 of them this year) alone because I know that could possibly expand my audience.

In terms of other forms of social media, I’ve come up in a lot of different search terms as of late.  There was a speaking agency that searched for me recently on LinkedIn, which raised my eye brows.  Shortly following that, I got a job interview and praise from a school in Indonesia.

The foundation of business and careers are built on relationships, and relationships form when people meet and interact with each other in an authentic way.  Also, I know you’re also aware of the fact that people prefer to do business with people they know, like, and trust.

Just like I recently stated, when you get together with other motivated business owners, there is an opportunity for things like joint ventures, clients leads, partnerships, speaking and writing opportunities, business or asset sales, investment opportunities and much more to emerge.

Creating connections and keeping them in your network is imperative.  Having a personal assistant, graphic designer, sound technician, and even a transcription person on board is critical.  You might not be able to pay for each person, but start small by giving them some important projects (at a one-time fee), and then work your way up to more significant projects.

Getting advice from the likes of Gary Vee and other entrepreneurs WHO HAVE BEEN THER is free.  Everything you’ve heard and read about will be retorted in a different way to you, so don’t be afraid.

https://www.spreaker.com/user/thearseniobuckshow/how-to-create-a-band-of-friends-that-wil

 

Darren Hardy’s Compound Effect – Hands-On Assessments (LONG-READ)

Gratitude Assessment

Three amazing people in my life are……..

This was very difficult for me to think about.  I mean last year was an exodus.  One of my “best” friends unwittingly booted herself out of my life.  Two of the three people I praised back in October/November ended up disappearing.  So, I had to go back to my roots and really just see who’s always been there for me. 

  1. Andre.  I was teaching at night and I got an odd call while teaching.  My best friend Andre, who lives in New York, called me to inform me about a tsunami warning.  There’s no one else who would do that for me in my life.  Although the tsunami was way out of Thailand’s reach, he knew that I probably knew friends in Japan who could’ve been affected by it.
  2. Joy.  If there’s someone I can FaceTime at anytime, even her being an 8-hour flight away, it’s her.  From meeting her in a bar-that-I-Won’t-Mention-In-Honolulu, to being my best friend.  Joy is a remarkable human being with even more remarkable kidlets (sorry, Joy).
  3. I’m going to put my colleague Nelson here.  Nelson, who is from Uganda, is a man that helps me de-shroud the black smoke that surrounds me some days.  Him and I went through a ridiculous fallout last year, but him being the bigger man — approached me in the restroom and we talked it out over drinks a week later, eyeing some gorgeous women (lol).  He’s the one that is currently giving me guidance in terms of where to teach next and what to do.

Three great things about my physical body are….

Running for a long-time without any physical exhaustion.  What my body has turned into through hard-work in a wonderful gym in the heart of Bangkok (The Lab), to doing competitions all over the world, is a spectacle. LOL! I’m so grateful for looking at myself in the mirror, up and down, saying “god DAMN! Now that IS a spectacle indeed!”  If I look at myself from when I first came to Thailand, to now….it’s been an amazing transformation.

Three great things about my home and where I live are….

Now just a months earlier, there’s not a thing I would say that would be positive about where I lived. I got sick often, dirty looks lunged towards me because of ____________, no courtesy, ignorant teenagers with spoilers, zooming in the night and waking me up constantly, loud music – pretty much the worst situation imaginable.

Now? Ultra-gorgeous condominium in a wonderful neighborhood where middle-upper class people live….people who have lots of courtesy, smiles, and don’t give me any dirty looks.

Three great things about where I work and what I do for a living are…..

HA! That’s a hilarious joke on my part.  Well, where I work now,I don’t work there anymore. I mean my body is there, but my spirit isn’t.  That place is finished.  A conclusions on top of a conclusion.  HOWEVER, where I’m soon to work has me more excited than ever, all thanks to Linkedin.  YES! Not only that, but the brand and online presence I’m building is exciting beyond anything I could’ve ever imagined.  Outside the primary job, which accustoms for only 5% of my life, is staggering.  The podcast, which is booming more than ever, is on fire.  My YouTube channel, which is hitting the highest marks ever, will soon be converted to an online classroom.  There are a handful of other things, and I’m grateful for all of them.

Three great gifts of unique talent or skills I’ve been given, or that have been created are…….

My personality, which was developed by being around my best friends in high school.  My discipline, which I continue to develop by listening to the likes of Gary Vee, Lisa Nichols and MindValley.  And lastly, my ability to make people laugh.  Yeah, I can point out the confidence, too.  However, I seriously have such a strong personality to the point that you either love me or hate me.

Three great gifts of knowledge and experience I’ve been given are….

I’m not black.

PERIOD.

I’m a being that has the opportunity to change the lives of millions around the world.  I have a core genius — something that I can focus on, develop, and improve — ultimately leading to unfathomable success.  (3) This country, known as Thailand, is the best place I could’ve developed my intra/interpersonal skills in the wake of some much racism.  BOOM!

Three ways in which my life is wealthy, abundance, and prosperous are……

Having a stacked savings that can protect me in times of turmoil.  Having unbelievably wonderful friends in my life who can help me at any given time.  Lastly, seeing my life without blinders are and seeing the true meaning of life – from the animals, to the people smiling everywhere around me.

Core Values Assessment

Who is the person I respect most in life? What are their core values?

Les Brown, Lisa Nichols, Tony Robbins, Bob Proctor, Alan Watts, Vishen Lakhiani and a few others got me into the game.  However, a person who has become a huge part of my life that doesn’t even know it – is Gary Vee.

Patience, keep creating and hard-work.  Now, his motto revolves a lot around “hustle,” which I’m not particularly fond of (because of the nature of the word in the streets of African American neighborhoods), but him telling other podcasters about being patient has helped me tremendously.

Who is my best friend and what is his top three qualities.

Andre – perseverance, never gave up, and persistence.

This guy has been through hell and back.  I won’t put his business all out there, but he lost a wonderful sister to Leukemia back in the last quarter of 2004.  He was accused of the most outlandish happenings from 2005-2008 and blamed by his family members.  He finally left in 2010 to New York and never returned.  Since then, that man has had a kid –with another on the way — and found a wonderful girlfriend (soon-to-be-fiancé-and-probably-wife-maybe).  He persevered through HELL…and I mean HELL…to become an owner of a warehouse.  He’s my inspiration.

If I can have an quality instantly, what would it be?

I have no regrets about who I am and what I “need,” but if I can have a quality instantly, it would be everything Gary knows.  That quality.  Whatever quality that is…I want it.

Which personality traits, attribute or quality do people most compliment me on?

This is my favorite.  I was speaking about this recently with one of my students.  I recall being in my college dorm and having Shayla, Alissa, DJ and Angie sitting in the room.  We had to take terms singing songs, and I had to sing “I swear” by  All For One (or what I thought was Soul 4 Real).  I sang it under my breath, but it seemed like she was trying ridiculously hard to hear my voice, and she succeeded.  I can’t remember when, but probably within a few months, people started raving about my voice.

One thing I didn’t have but developed — were dance moved.  I was made fun of by the entire softball team because I kept “snapping” my fingers and had the same move.  LOL! Good times.

But then there was my professor in dental assisting who said, “Arsenio, what you have is a gift.  You can’t teach personality and what you have is going to take you a long way in life.

She was absolutely right.

Also, my body.  That’s right.  What I’m not good at is accepting the compliment about my body.  Lol.  When I get compliments from South Americans, I find it super sexy.  Women from Costa Rica, Chile and other places say “muy guapo,” and I feel what they actually say.  However, I think when people call me handsome in Thailand it’s either with condition (they want to solicit sex for money – hahahah), or they’re just being nice but what they really wanna say is, “you’re a black man.”  Nonetheless, I know I’m becoming a freak, and that’s exciting.

Life/Habit Assessments, along with influences, are in the podcast down below.

Darren Hardy’s Compound Effect: Full Book Review

It’s been a hell of a journey in terms of the Compound Effect.  I went through this book and inherited a wide-range of actionable tools, and hopefully you did, too.

Here are my best parts about the book and some podcasts to follow.

Microwave Mentality

As I’ve told you so many times, there’s the smallest percentage ever who become an “instant success,” but you’re going to have to do-away with that mentality. The “insta-results” and lottery-winning expectations are a no-go because that same person endured hundreds of failures.

In the sports world, there’s no chance at you becoming a genetically gifted monster like Terrel Owens and a few other NFL players were.  The countless hours of reps, sweating, running bleachers, conditioning and hauling ass on the field is all behind the scenes.  The “lose weight fast; get abs in 6-weeks” blogs are bogus.  Fact is everyone has abs, but most people have them covered by fat.

In Thailand you have a beauty pill.  This beauty pill, which would be unbelievably illegal on top of illegal in America, can be bought in shops here.  The pill that causes diarrhea, vomiting and a range of other ailments, is used to make women “beautiful.”  No, you need to put in the world, and there’s no other way around it.

Choice

Look, everyone has a choice.  I really hate to put it in blunt terms, especially for people who are possibly living in impoverished countries, but you had the choice to join that gang.  You had the choice to smoke that “blunt.”  You made the choice of slandering someone online, only to hurt yourself more.

“Think about it. Everything in your life exists because you first made a choice about something. Choices are at the root of every one of your results. Each choice starts a behavior that over time becomes a habit. Choose poorly, and you just might find yourself back at the drawing board, forced to make new, often harder choices. Don’t choose at all, and you’ve made the choice to be the passive receiver of whatever comes your way.”

Excerpt From: Darren Hardy. “The Compound Effect.” iBooks.

“Have you ever been bitten by an elephant? How about a mosquito? It’s the little things in life that will bite you. Occasionally, we see big mistakes threaten to destroy a career or reputation in an instant—the famous comedian who rants racial slurs during a stand-up routine, the drunken anti-Semitic antics of a once-celebrated humanitarian, the anti-gay-rights senator caught soliciting gay sex in a restroom, the admired female tennis player who uncharacteristically threatens an official with a tirade of expletives. Clearly, these types of poor choices have major repercussions. But even if you’ve pulled such a whopper in your past, it’s not extraordinary massive steps backward or the tragic single moments that we’re concerned with here.”

I’m calling out all Americans: “it was you that bought the frozen food at the store, not the food companies profiting from you.”  I recently saw a photo of my not-so-immediate family at a party, and with the six women in the photo, I would have to make a guestimate that the total weight of all of them put together had to be around 2000 lbs.  This has become the norm.  So normal in fact that my Aunt, who i love so dearly, claimed that I was too skinny and that I needed to gain weight – even though I’m an extremely healthy weight.  Bizarre.

I’m imploring all of you to just say to yourself, “everything that is happening in my life is the result of my past thoughts and actions.  For me to change what’s happening in my life, I need to change my thoughts and actions.”

Super impose that and stick it above the bathroom mirror in big red lettering.  Make it a “pocket map” and read it every time you unload your pockets in the evening – kind of like a gratitude rock.  Be responsible for it all.

I’m declaring ownership to why all those egregiously krass and vice behaving Thai women approached me on different social media platforms – saying I was “black.  Yuck. Disgusting. I hate black men. Go back to Africa!”

Yeah, some of you are saying, “but you didn’t deserve that.”  It’s not what I deserve, it’s what I unconsciously called into existence.

University of Hard Knocks – My Favorite Part

Oh, yes! Thank you, Mr. _______ for telling me I wasn’t good enough in wake of one of the most racially influenced situations I’ve ever endured in my life.  Thanks to the company ____________, which I’ll be giving a firm shout out to, for showing me that I can do so so much more.  Yes, it was rough in the beginning.  What I thought was a sure-job heading into the last week of the year — turned — hiatus.  This was wrenching, simply because I almost severed my own head at my job by flipping birds and talking bad about wife-tourists.  I almost slipped up viciously, but luckily I didn’t; or else,  I’d be out of a job right now.  In the unfolding of the first quarter of this year are the dimensions of the “transitional period” for me.  Yeah, there’s a lot “if” and “omg, what’s going to happen next?”  However, I feel like I’m on the verge of getting my Master’s Degree at the University of Hard Knocks!

Success Is A (Half-) Marathon

Let’s put it this way: Sprint, Super, Beast.

The Spartan Spring is 7km long; Super is 13km long; and the beastly Beast is 20km long.

If this is your first time doing the competition, or if you’ve fat and overweight, would it be smart to do the Beast? No.

Super? No.

Sprint? NO!

None of them.  What’s smart is to walk for 100m-400m every morning and get in the groove.  The micro winds.  Some people want to take leaps.  I remember a man by the name of Mike, who was Persian, said to me “Arsenio, can you train me for the olympics?”  Mike had never ran the 100m or 200m sprint before in his life, let alone he was clocking in an 11.5 in the 100m.  In the olympics, you have to be sub-10 seconds.

Mike, no.  However, if you train everyday, get the proper nutrition, see a masseuse on a routine basis and search for a how-to guide, you’ll ultimately make waves – but not in America.

I’m not trying to discourage Mike, but it’s a bit insane to just jump in with the wolves without knowing what their diet is – if that makes any sense.

The other podcasts and recommendations are in the podcast down below!

Darren Hardy: Do The Unexpected & Do Better Than Expected

Have you guys seen  the “do what the 99 percent aren’t doing?”

Yeah, I’ve seen those as thumbnails on YouTube videos and at least on a weekly basis on Instagram.

If you look at Christmas and how everyone sends Christmas cards; in addition, the family members who want to be handed materialistic things.  Those things we already expect, right? So it kind of just loses its value.  Take a look at the trends that are happening right now.  I just read something online that said, “think about what’s going to happen in five years then do that.”

Elon Musk just launched one of the heaviest rockets into orbit, sending a roadster into space and landing two booster rockets.  NASA thought he was crazy and Jeff Bezos, who’s his competitor, has tried rebuking everything he’s ever done.  All of that was completely ignored when Falcon Heavy used 4-5 million pounds of TNT to launch itself off the platform, beaming what looked like the thickest lightsabres in the world from the tail and soaring into the sky — followed by endless cheers.

He got a ridiculous amount of praise online for it….because he did what so many people wouldn’t do.  He did what NASA is terrified of doing, and that’s doing the unthinkable – the impossible.

More often than not, the extra effort doesn’t come with dollar signs or energy.

After posting a few days on LinkedIn, I realized that maybe this could be very reputable and beneficial to what I’m doing with expanding my brand.  Just two days ago, after going over a part of an ESL Business book with some executives, I realized that LinkedIn proved to be extremely beneficial with recruiters checking my profile.

I later talked to my graphic designer and even before the banner was made for my social media platforms, she agreed to make one specifically for LinkedIn, which is the most important platform for my business and the growth.

That came with very little effort.

“If I set my sights on something, I’m going to ensure success by going all in and all out. I launch what I call “shock and awe” campaigns. During this same job hunt I suggested Alex pull out all the stops—attack from every possible front and do it relentlessly.”

Excerpt From: Darren Hardy. “The Compound Effect.” iBooks. https://itunes.apple.com/us/book/the-compound-effect/id1212219081?mt=11

Do better than expected

“Find the line of expectation and then exceed it. Even when it comes to the small stuff—or maybe especially then. Whatever I think the dress standard is going to be for any event, for example, I always choose to go at least one step above it. When I am unsure of the attire, I always err on the side of dressing better than I suppose the occasion calls for. Simple, I know, but it’s just one way I try to meet my standard to always do and be better than expected.” – Darren Hardy

The last note….

“I challenge you to adopt these philosophies in your own life—in your daily habits, disciplines and routines. Giving a little more time, energy, or thought to your efforts won’t just improve your results; it will multiply them. It takes very little extra to be EXTRAordinary. In all areas of your life, look for the multiplier opportunities where you can go a little further, push yourself a little harder, last a little longer, prepare a little better, and deliver a little bit more. Where can you do better and more than expected? When can you do the totally unexpected? Find as many opportunities for “WOW,” and the level and speed of your accomplishments will astonish you… and everyone else around you.” – Darren Hardy

Podcast

https://www.spreaker.com/user/thearseniobuckshow/darren-hardy-do-the-unexpected-do-better

Darren Hardy: Exceeding Expectations – Oprah’s Ultimate Viewers Win A Trip

During this particular Oprah video, she was going to surprise her audience with a trip to Australia.  However, the anticipation had some of the audience members in tears.  She mentioned Philadelphia, then mentioned New York and said, “well I was think this place, but I told myself that I wanted to do something…..bigger.”  The build-up was incredible, and then when she said the other side of the world, the audience erupted without even knowing where they were going until she rolled the airplane and confetti — expectations exceeded.

The gorgeous part about this is not only how warmhearted Oprah is, but the expectations that each individual was feeling at the time.  I mean the build-up was unlike anything I’ve ever seen before in my life.  This is especially something I want to do with my staff one day.

When I was first introduced the idea of developing a conversation curriculum, I had no idea that it would turn into a multi-million baht course and the most sought after one in the entire school.  In the beginning, they asked me “how much would you want for creating this course?”  I got paid maybe 200$ and the course has made between 50k-100k since then.  Was that fair? Obviously not….but we weren’t sure how well it was going to get.

Going forward, I’m getting insane ideas about uploading and delivering so many test preparation videos, courses and other things to beat all the other language centers.  Is this centered around me “getting back” at a language center? Of course not, because then I would never be happy, even if I did achieve the goal.  This is me building an empire.  I’m literally uploading a video per day and since then (over the last four days), the viewership and clicks on my website and YouTube page has sky-rocketed.

I asked myself at the time, “what can I do? What can I do to build more of an audience?” I was depleted and discouraged over the Christmas holiday because all forms of communication had hit a new low, but that was mainly because I stopped creating.  I had no idea that being consistent would allow me to take over all of YouTube and beat out every other “test prep” video.

That extra-mile means everything.

While I was working out this morning, I had Darren Hardy’s words in the back of my mind. “When that pain kicks in, you push more because that’s when the growth takes place.”

“Where in life can you do more than expected when you hit the wall?  Or where can you go for “WOW?” It doesn’t take a lot more effort, but the little extra multiplies your results many times over.  Whether you’re making calls, serving customers, reorganizing your team, acknowledging your spouse, going for a run, bench pressing, planning a date night, sharing time with your kids, whatever…..what’s the little extra you can do that exceeds expectations and accelerates your results?” – Darren Hardy

Podcast

https://www.spreaker.com/user/thearseniobuckshow

 

Darren Hardy: Multiplying Your Results

What if you can speed up the process and multiply your results?

Well, I just realized this recently.  With my test preparation videos, I wasn’t as consistent as I should’ve been last year.  I mean, even going back to the beginning stages of me uploading.  I launched two videos back in 2015 and stopping making videos all the way until last year.  Not good enough.

So, I asked myself how I can bring in more traffic? Staying consistent! DUH!

So over the last few days I decided that I would make one grammar preparation video, an incomplete sentence video, and one other specifically catering to TOEIC.  I also decided to throw at least one IELTS video in every week and possibly a TOEFL video.  That’s literally 5-6 videos a week.  In doing that, and just doing that the last few days, I’ve saw one of the biggest influxes in views, revenue, sharing and all other analytics in a three-day period EVER!

How did this happen? Consistency = multiplying results.

“Let’s say you’re weight training and your program calls for you to do twelve repetitions of a certain weight. Now, if you do the twelve, you’re fulfilling the expectation of your program. Great job. Stay consistent, and ultimately, you will see this discipline compound into powerful results for you. Yet, if you get to twelve, even if you’ve hit your max, and you push out another three to five reps, your impact on that set will be multiplied several times. You won’t just add a few reps to the aggregate of your workout. No. Those reps done after you hit your max will multiply your results. You’ve just pushed through the wall of your max. The previous reps just got you there. The real growth happens with what you do after you’re at the wall.”

Excerpt From: Darren Hardy. “The Compound Effect.” iBooks.

I mentioned in a recent podcast about how Ali never started counting his ab reps until the pain came in….because that’s when the growth took place.

Runners can attest to this, too.  Anytime I run a 10km race, the first km is a drag trying to control my breathing.  Shortly following that, I hit the wall probably halfway through.  It never has to do with my breathing but always the lower-body.  This is the “growth” stage of the race.  Another instance was when I was doing a recent strength training class in the evening.  After a few side squats with the kettlebell, I felt not pain, but soreness in my hamstrings and glutes.  I continued fighting through the discomfort and after the workout and in the ensuing couple of days, I could barely even walk.  However, when my muscle soreness goes away, I’ll be a hell of a lot stronger than before.

“Viewing yourself as your toughest competitor is one of the best ways to multiply your results. Go above and beyond when you hit the wall. Another way to multiply your results is pushing past what other people expect of you—doing more than “enough.” – Darren Hardy

Podcast

https://www.spreaker.com/user/thearseniobuckshow/darren-hardy-multiplying-your-results