Wheel of Life with Celina Celeste: Christmas Edition – Full Year Review (2018)

Man! What a year this was! Looking back on all of my wheel of life’s throughout the year, I was a scared boy in the beginning.  I’m super surprised that I made it this far in Thailand, this year, without giving up.  Looking where I was at the beginning, trying to get away from one of the most toxic jobs I’ve ever been a part of (and for a wicked three years), and seeing where I am now?! Just how did it happen? Well, this podcast isn’t only about myself, but it’s about Celina, who joins me on this gorgeous Christmas morning to give grace to what was a life-changing year for her, too! Here are my scores, a rundown, and then the podcast. 

Personal Development – 10

Why am I starting off with one of the highest marks? Well, honestly….if it wasn’t for Napoleon Hill’s Mental Attitude, Gary Vee in my ear, communicating with entrepreneurs all around the globe…no way this could’ve been so high.  From meeting Luke Burrows in February, to Celina (you) in March, and interviewing an author named David Mauro in the early stages of the year — kicking off a spectacular run — no words can describe it.  

Since then I’ve co-host a show with Luke Burrows called Motivational Mentors.  I’ve brought entrepreneurs from Malaysia on and even hired a content writer, Jiun Ting Yong, who’s been doing show notes and write-ups on TheArsenioBuckShow.com.  I got rid of a toxic graphic designer and hired another one from Myanmar who’s done very diligent work for me. I’m not speaking to coaches, mentors, entrepreneurs and others all around the globe, exchanging ideas on a daily basis.  This year, in terms of people individuals, has topped the previous 29 years of my life…and it’s not even close. 

Physical Environment – 9.5

At the beginning, I was shrugging off a toxic work environment, and that’s basically it.  After that, and towards the end of the year, perfect workplace with flexible hours, communicating with big companies all over Bangkok who are asking me for services, and living at a perfect condo. I can’t complain. 

Career – 10

This absolutely correlates with personal development. Yes, I could’ve launched some projects, but now on the dawn of the New Years, I have a course coming out on the Grow2Gether Academy.  I’ll be making a test with Celina, herself, for an English Test Preparation course, I’m launching The Arsenio Buck Foundation and my TOEIC grammar EBook in January.  That’s about 30% of what’s happening.  Honestly, since I dumped that job, my life has completely changed. COMPLETELY!

Wealth – 7

This category remains stagnant.  Grateful, but not much of a change from the beginning of the year.  Why? Literally freelancing and hustling and have been since the beginning.  From the beginning of my new life (after my old job) until now, I don’t have a “legit job,” therefore it’s pretty hard to know what’s coming and what’s not.  Plan for the New Years? Make multiple streams of income, and three of them will be launched at the beginning of the year.  No more working for money….let money work for me. 

Health – 9

Aside from some ailments that weren’t serious, I achieved one of the biggest goals of my life (the Spartan Trifecta). 

Fun & Hobbies – 10

7 countries.  Yes, i had to go based on being pressured by a Thai government, but being able to go to HK (somewhat of a forgettable trip), and my wondrous Singapore twice, was a blessing.  Yes, going back to Malaysia to meet my newly employed content writer in April, and having gone back to Malaysia in July AGAIN for some fun, was another blessing.  I began making my own schedule with my job, and having that type of control means all the difference in the world. 

Romantic Relationships

This was by far, the worst year.  Well, it’s a year that I stayed focused and didn’t want to get emotionally involved with ANYONE. It ended up playing dividends and helping me.  I didn’t let anyone (women — lol) inside my close circle.  I kept it tight with the most reliable people in my life, and I didn’t suffer any massive heartbreaks or fallouts. 

Family & Friends – 4

It’s not a bad 4.  I know, extremely low.  Family doesn’t exist and I didn’t add any friends, but it’s the smartest decision EVER.  I don’t want to add new friends, ANYMORE, to my closed circle.  They will forever being on the outside because I simply don’t trust “friends,” I only trust those that give me oxygen. 

 

Get in touch with Celina Celeste

Links:

Things we discussed:

Personal development and entrepreneurship.

How we connected with people who shared similar values on personal development.

Career and business opportunities together with goal-setting.

Entrepreneurial mindset.

Career pathways and its abstract manners.

Clarity and volunteering.

Relationships (of all sorts).

Inner and outer circle friends.

Vulnerability and outer-layer of support.

Friendships.

Hobbies and fun.

New hobbies and picking up skills to develop when you are facing unhappiness.

Commitments and new relationships.

Self-awareness.

Physical and mental health.

Finances.

Podcast

Listen to “Wheel of Life with Celina Celeste: Christmas Edition – Full Year Review (2018)” on Spreaker.

Thank you for listening!

 

Links:

  1. Facebook page: https://www.facebook.com/thearseniobuckshow/
  2. Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thearseniobuckshow/?hl=en
  3. YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCIzp4EdbJVMhhSnq_0u4ntA
  4. Podcasts: https://www.spreaker.com/user/thearseniobuckshow, https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/the-arsenio-buck-show/id1181794790?mt=2, https://open.spotify.com/show/0x39CEN5tHvfRtfZaAMTgQ?si=8cpdu1rTTjKHogufXh91Cw
  5. Website: https://thearseniobuckshow.com/
  6. Twitter: https://twitter.com/arseniobuckshow?lang=en

Stephen Covey’s Speed of Trust: Season 4 – Episode 3 – The Five Waves of Trust

Stephen Covey posted in the book what I THOUGHT was AMAZING! Let’s break it down.

Five years ago I was working with some associates in a small group and they loved the approach: “We love this leadership content! It’s right on! But our division leaders don’t understand this.  They are the ones who really need to hear it.”

After that, he presented the content to the division leaders: we’re in full agreement with everything you’re saying.  This approach is GREAT! The problem is that the people who really need it are our bosses.”

He went to the bosses…..and again…..”We are enthusiastic about this content! It’s very insightful and helpful.  But our counterparts in the five divisions don’t understand this.  They are the ones who need to hear it.”

It went on and on, as you can see.  Finally, after probably 7-8 presentations, there was the CEO.

“This content is great, but I’m powerless.  I can do nothing.  It’s all in the hands of the board.”

His father once said, “if you think the problem is out there, that very thought is the problem.”

People, just because there are trust issues in your workplace, to your personal life, it doesn’t mean you’re powerless!  In fact, you probably have no idea how powerful you can be in changing the level of trust in any relationship if you know how to work “from the inside out.”

The First Wave: Self Trust

The first wave deals with us.  Our ability to set and achieve goals, to keep commitments, to walk our talk — and also with our ability to inspire trust in others.

The key underlying principle of this trust is credibility, the four cores we’ll be getting into shortly.

So, when you’re not able to keep your commitments, as mentioned before, you lose integrity, credibility, trust, and so many other things.

The Second Wave: Relationship Trust

Trust accounts. Period.  We will go over the 13 behaviors coming up real soon, and all of these rules can be applied either at home or work.  This can significantly increase the ability to generate trust with all involved in order to enhance relationships.

The Third Wave; Organizational Trust

How leaders can deal with trust.  Gary Vee and Tom Bilyeau were recently speaking on a podcast about trust issues and changing from the top.  If you have trust issues amongst the bottom, imagine what’s happening at the top? I worked for a guy in the heart of CBD and he told the guy below him, “don’t let Arsenio teach TOEIC because the students don’t like black teachers.”  He was against it, ofcourse.  Now I’m writing ebooks on TOEIC because I knew what my strength was.  Sometimes distrust can spell STRENGTH.

The Fourth Wave: Market Trust

This is about your company/personal brand, which reflects the trust customers, investors, and others in the marketplace have in you.

Now that I’m building a personal brand with my ESL podcast and blogs, if and when I start teaching through my business, my name is everything. If my name is attached to thievery and distrust, it’s over. I lose.

The Fifth Wave: Societal Trust

The principle underlying this wave is contribution.  This is why I’m doing my Arsenio Buck Foundation.  We counteract this “giving back” with suspicious, cynicism, and low-trust inheritance. We can also inspire others to create value and contribute, as well.

So, I’ll first talk about restoring trust, seeking, speaking, behaving, and then we’ll kick off the first wave.

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Q & A – ArsenioBuck@icloud.com

LinkedIn – https://www.linkedin.com/in/arsenio-b…

Instagram – https://www.instagram.com/thearseniobuckshow/?hl=en

Podcast

My Story

So, because my blog, podcasts, Instagram and other means of social media is gaining a lot of momentum, I think it’s time to finally introduce myself on a scale no one ever has.

  • Mother/Father broke up in 97.
  • Two step mothers and three elementary schools in a one year period.
  • Father dropped my siblings and I off at a doorstep in 1999.
  • Moved in with my mother in June of 1999 — and the rest is history.

This was the shambolic childhood.  However, it sounds all bad, and I completely understand from your point of view, but this turned out to best the greatest blessing ever in my life.  Those Christmas morning of 93, 94, and 95 were some of the best of my life.  My grade school was amazing, wonderful friends, and I was introduced to one of the greatest eras of music in humankind (1990’s), along with Sega Genesis and Super Nintendo.  Let’s not forget that.

From 2000-2006, my mother did an amazing job.  We had our transgressions when power got cut off in late 2003, but my mom did everything in her power to restore it (just a day later). I’m super grateful for that.  After choosing to go to college, then demoting my “choice of major” even more (going from Orthodontics, to Dental Hygiene, to Dental Assisting), it was another great blessing.

The Change from a Promise

Satomi Nakagawa, who visited me in 2008, fell to her knees one evening and cried: “I’m never going to see you again.”

She was distressed because the potential of not seeing me again.  In that moment came a promise, “don’t worry, I’ll come to see you.”  I’m not exactly sure if I said next year, but it ended up happening next year when I had the idea of traveling abroad.  BOOM!

Two months after booking a trip, I saw Satomi again and Kingsford International Airport.  The importance of this trip, seeing Darling Harbour, Blue Mountains, and going to Bondi Beach…..was when a seed had blossomed within my mind.  When this happened, I was never the same again.  Living in America was no longer exciting to me (Las Vegas, but let’s be honest, it’s all boring — sorry).  I visited again in 2010 (Melbourne) and met some Mauritians and Indonesians.  One morning I walked along St. Kilda beach and then I decided “I’m moving here next year.”  I told my mother after coming back, and she got teary-eyed.  It was the sign of change, but at the same time, she knew i had to go after what was mine in the universe.  Sure enough, 2011 came rolling around and the last time I felt like I saw my mother was when she gave me a hug, cried, and drove off in a car.

Battles in Australia

Psychological battles galore. I questioned myself about having a personality that wasn’t suitable for Aussies.  I was too personable; too charismatic; too funny.  Just too out there in general.  I remember running down to a harbour area in Lane Cove (north of Sydney) and saying to myself, “they don’t like me here.  Why don’t I have a girlfriend?”

Fast-forwarding that particular situation to my present situation, I’m single — 7 years later.

Rewinding back to that moment….I told a Colombian friend and she said, “Arsenio, you have one of the most beautiful personalities.  Don’t worry about these people.”

Yes.

That was that moment.

I would need that 5 years later when I got into the biggest psychological battle of my life.

Thailand in the YouTube video (coming soon) & Podcast

 

Interviewee #20 – Perry Power – The Art of Storytelling

With a history of sexual abuse and losing his father just over a year ago, Perry has managed to use these dark times and turn it into lightness in order to inspire others to do the same. Believing that our ‘mess is our message’, Perry walks us through how we each have a unique story and hidden power, which we need to find in order to become the best version of ourselves.

Get in touch with Perry Power of the UK

– About the art of storytelling.

 

Links:

 

Things we discussed:

  • Introduction by Perry Power.
  • How Perry started it all?
  • Sharing about Perry’s childhood.
  • Deciding to talk about sexual abuse.
  • Sharing about dark times in an individual’s life.
  • Talking about a man’s ego.
  • Sharing your grief.
  • Talking about struggles in life.
  • The power of being vulnerable.
  • Talking about anger.
  • Sharing about how to shift a mindset about being yourself.
  • Talked about his first FB video.
  • The power of sharing.
  • The power of storytelling.
  • How you tell your story.
  • How old were you when you first started personal development?
  • What did personal development teach you?
  • Hate and forgiveness.
  • Talking about your history of sexual abuse.
  • You need some chapters to your storytelling.
  • The defining moment in your life and in your storytelling.
  • Perfecting your storytelling.
  • You need a flow like a slide in your storytelling.
  • What do you want to accomplish and what are you building?

 

 

Thank you for listening!

 

Thank you so much for joining me for this podcast. Please do write down some feedbacks and comments. Please do share this podcast on your social media.

 

Links:

 

Questions & Answers: How Did I Develop My Strength/What Makes You Different From Your Brother?

Wonderful question came in today from a friend in Japan asking something very deep – something I somewhat covered in my last podcast.  So, here are the questions.

Where do you get your strength from?

I lived in Australia for one year.  I thought I was ostricized by society.  There were days I thought I was depressed and told my housemate, “no one likes me here.”

She retorter, “you have a beautiful personality! Don’t worry about others!”  Of course all I did at the time was watch the secret.  There was no Les Brown, Lisa Nichols, MindValley, Tom Bilyeu, or any of these other entrepreneurs, speakers and massive business titans.  I didn’t know the process in terms of bio-hacking the mind.  So throughout my stint in Australia, I had to learn the hard way.  I had a fair-weather friend named Thayanna who ended up disappearing mid-way through the way.  There was no “best friend” from Arizona, just like  there wasn’t in October of 2014 (later story) and last year.  I then realized throughout everything I experienced in Australia…my mother, with a simple comment, pretty much told me that there was no quitting.

“So you’re complaining about life there? If you come back….then what? I don’t have a place for you to stay.  Tina is living here.  You don’t know what to do.”

Basically I can go on and on about that text message but she pretty much gave me a big “f*** you” and “there’s no room for you at the house anymore.”  It was like the disownment I needed.  The “build your courage now or you’re homeless” type of motivation.  And from then on….I never gave up — and a seed was born within me.

Podcast

Aggressive Mask: Part IV – What Can We Do Right Now?

“In the middle of my conversation with Ray Lewis, I asked him about his definition of a man and whether it had evolved as he got older, had kids, became successful, and ultimately retired. By way of answering my question, he told me a story about when he came to a deeper understanding of the challenges the men in his family have faced.

He was 33 years old. He’d reengaged with his long-absent father, and his father wanted him to meet a man named Shady Ray Whitehead who lived in some little trailer 6 hours outside of Charlotte, North Carolina. He had no idea where they were going or who this man was they were visiting, but when they arrived, he and his father walked in and his father said, “Meet your grandfather.”

Ray sat on the floor while his dad sat on the couch, and they talked. One of the first things out of his father’s mouth was a question to his grandfather that had also run through Ray’s head nearly every day of the first 17 years of his life: “Dad, why’d you leave me?” To say this blindsided Ray would be an understatement.

“Ray sat with this information for a while, listening to his father and grandfather, and started to think about the men in his family who struggled in their relationships. Ray’s realization is something out of a novel, or a sermon:

This is a generational curse, man. My son is 21, I’m 41, my father is 61, my grandfather’s 81. His father is 101. Five generations. Twenty years apart. What are we doing? I rode back home with my father for 6 hours while he kept talking, and I never said a word. When I got done listening to him, I said to him: “You know what a man is? A man accepts all of the wrongs, never complains, forgives, and then moves on.” That’s what a man does, because you can never replace him not being at a football game. Never replace him not being to a wrestling match, or a track meet. Beat up by a group of kids? You can never replace him not being there. You can never replace that. So what you can replace is you can replace it with moving on.”

“This is our work to do. The rewards are, indeed, waiting for us, but they will not make themselves known until we begin the process of dropping our Aggressive Mask.”

Replace it with moving on.  It’s time to top off the chapter with my own story.

My father, in 1999, dropped my brother, my sisters, and I off at a doorstep of a house before driving away.  He said, “knock on the door and ask for your mother.”  We did, and he sped off, not seeing him again for the ensuing months.  It was odd, me being only 11 years old and living in more than 5 different households over a year span.

In 2000, I saw someone walking down the street and said, “that looks like my dad!”  Minutes later, I went back home and I was right.  It was my father….and him being in the same household as my mother, went nuts.  Not necessarily on his end, but my mother bursts into anger anytime she hears the name “Willie.”  He wanted “in” our lives, and so my mother granted that if we wanted it.

I remember he was on the phone and I was suppose to go to him that weekend.  I said, “dad, do you have the video games?”  What sounded like video games weren’t, but my father was a master at lying.  After naming three videos games, the third one being my favorite, I bursted into tears of joy before going upstairs to tell my mom.  My mother eavesdropped on the conversation because you could do that by picking up the other line 18 years ago.  I told her what my father got and she said, “he didn’t get you those games. He’s lying.”

I said, “you never did anything for us.”

She cried.

I felt absolutely wretched….even more wretched because she was telling the truth.  My dad was a liar from day 1 and I never knew it until of course that day.  I remember seeing him maybe late 2000 after he came over.  After that, I never saw him again, only hearing his voice on a bus in 2007 and looking square into his eyes in another incident (on the bus) one year later.

I’m blaming him for being the amazing man I am today.

“A man who struggles with aggression needs, first and foremost, to channel his energy and anger in a constructive direction. There are a number of ways to do this at a practical level:
▸Create a wrecking room in your house where you can get it out safely. Fill it with things to smash, push, hit, and pummel. If you can’t get a room, get a pillow. Beat the hell out of it. And repeat.
▸Do cathartic shouting exercises once a week. Scream it out!
▸Take a boxing class, work out, swim, or run.
▸Create an affirmation (e.g., “I’m a peaceful, joyful, loving man”) that you say when you want to break something or get aggressive. – Lewis Howes

Podcast

 

Dale Carnegie’s: Making People Glad To Do What You Want

Because of our personal preferences and interests, we’re never able to look at life through someone else’s shoes, right? We want to look at how we can benefit ourselves first versus anyone else.  That’s why the term “selfish” gets thrown around so much in relationships and friendships.

How can you begin to suggest things to someone, but first show them the rewards of it?

1. Be sincere. Do not promise anything that you cannot deliver. Forget about the benefits to yourself and concentrate on the benefits to the other person.

  • I stopped making promises a long time ago because I would have a fulfilment of about 50%.  Not only do you lose face, but also respect.  The distrust begins to increase and then people just think you’re full of s***.

2. Know exactly what it is you want the other person to do.

3. Be empathetic. Ask yourself what it is the other person really wants.

  • Always look at it from their standpoint and how they can benefit from it – your standpoint can wait.

4. Consider the benefits that person will receive from doing what you suggest.

  • This part can be fun.  As I talked about in my podcast about a father seeking out the benefits of his child, this can relate to a lot of parents out there.

5. Match those benefits to the other person’s wants.

6. When you make your request, put it in a form that will convey to the other person the idea that he personally will benefit. We could give a curt order like this: “John, we have customers coming in tomorrow and I need the stockroom cleaned out. So sweep it out, put the stock in neat piles on the shelves and polish the counter.” Or we could express the same idea by showing John the benefits he will get from doing the task: “John, we have a job that should be completed right away. If it is done now, we won’t be faced with it later. I am bringing some customers in tomorrow to show our facilities. I would like to show them the stockroom, but it is in poor shape. If you could sweep it out, put the stock in neat piles on the shelves, and polish the counter, it would make us look efficient and you will have done your part to provide a good company image.

Podcast