Practicing Accountability

Practicing accountability. Man, how hard is it to be accountable for other people’s actions? I mean, it’s easy to say “hey, you’re not performing on the job. Please get your act together!” But if you’re selling and getting clients, but you never come through because you don’t have the teachers to deliver the results….you LOSE!

Old Job Marketing Executive

Ok, old job and a guy by the name of WHO CARES is great at telling the clients what they want to hear. He gets an enormous amount of clients around BKK. However, because he works for a language center that lacks the teachers that can deliver results, his reputation and capabilities take a significant hit.

That’s like most NBA/NFL franchises. They promise the world, salaries, help, championships, but they never deliver to those individuals who they promise. This is when you make a bad name for yourself.

At some stage of my career, I’m going to probably have to employ staff (teachers), but this really scares the hell out of me because I know most aren’t capable of getting the job done. That’s why I would love to hold my own workshops, create my own courses, deliver all the materials by myself.

This behavior is built on the principles of accountability, responsibility, stewardship, and ownership. The opposite of this behavior is to not take responsibility, to not own up, but rather to say, “It’s not my fault.” Its counterfeit is to point fingers and blame others, to say, “It’s their fault.”

Podcast

Speed of Trust: Season 4 – Episode 46 – Behavior #6 – Deliver RESULTS!

If you want to establish a relationship with a client, what is one thing you can do to build trust the fastest?

Stephen Covey

DELIVER THE RESULTS!

When I first started teaching at a language center and company, I would venture out to a part of town/street that I used to work on in my previous job. Get this, the new company was located just 1km down the street where I was fired — which lead to me quitting the job that had originally sent me there because of mistreatment.

Going down there was nostalgic, and I really didn’t want go down a road that had been closed in the previous 5 months, but because I did and delivered the results, the chirps happened.

What do I mean by that? Well, different institutions began contacting me around Bangkok saying, “we heard about you through _____________ and we heard you’re a great teacher.” That word-of-mouf happened and that took me to the next level because I DELIVERED RESULTS.

Results give you instant credibility and instant trust. They give you clout. They clearly demonstrate that you add value, that you can contribute, that you can perform.

In a separate story, when I got the results needed for my students to go to universities around the world, it created chatter amongst the toxic Gen B foreigner teachers at my previous job. They were scared: “does this mean he will get more IELTS test? But he can’t teach this…or that. So more pre-conceived notions came in and that’s when I began teaching outside because I knew what my capabilities were.

Results provide a powerful tool for building trust in your relationships with others.

Stephen Covey

I post all the results of specific tests online. Why? Because people then know if I can deliver. What’s a more reputable institution: Arsenio Buck, or The British Council? Well, I see Arsenio teaching on YouTube, podcasts, Facebook lives, and free live sessions on Facebook. He’s demonstrated that he knows what he’s talking about. British Council, on the other hand, doesn’t show her the teachers are, what they do, free coaching, and doesn’t provide services. It just provides a “check out” page on their website.

The opposite of Deliver Results is performing poorly or failing to deliver. The counterfeit is delivering activities instead of results.

It’s like the people who make fantastic presentations and exciting promises….but never come through.

A funny, but head-scratching example of this would be Ja Rule, an American Rapper who promised a Fyre Festival full of booze, resort villas, 5-star gourmet food, and more. He delivered refugee tents, food in styrofoam boxes, and out-houses. What’s more shocking is people were bamboozled not only once, but three times! They didn’t learn the first time; therefore, he did it again, and again….and now people finally know how scandalous he is.

Another example would be a place I worked for before. In short, my student got a 7 on a speaking test. She paid an ABSURD AMOUNT OF MONEY at a famous institution and it went down to a 6. She learned with me again and shot up to a 7.5 on her speaking test.

So, going forward, I can NEVER recommend that language institution because they didn’t deliver the results.

Speed of Trust: Season 4 – Episode 37 – Demonstrating Trust Part III – Tips

Think back to some of the researched. Why is it that only 29 percent of employees believe that management cares about them developing their skills? Why is it that only 42 percent believe that management cares about them at all? In too many cases, though management might talk about it, fundamentally, management does not behave in ways that demonstrate respect, and as a result, employees don’t trust management.

And what is the impact on speed and cost? When employees believe their managers really don’t care, how willing are they to give their best? To be innovative? To collaborate? On the other hand, how quick are employees to complain? Criticize? Strike?

Stories in Podcast

  • Present work story about director not caring
  • Employee getting a free pass for no-call, no-show

Trust Tips

Apply the “waiter” rule to yourself in terms of how you treat people at work and at home. Do you like what you see? If not, focus on improving your intent?

Think about specific things you can do to show others you care about them. Call people. Write thank-you notes. Give acknowledgement. Send emails of concern. Try to do something each day to put a smile on someone’s face–even if that someone is the janitor in the building where you work. Don’t let there be a gap between how you feel and what you do.

Never take relationships for granted — particularly relationships with loved ones, family, and friends. Avoid the common tendency to put more energy into new relationships and assume that people in existing relationships know you care. There is probably a greater need for demonstrations of concern in existing relationships than in new relationships.

The basis of this is to genuinely care for others. Show you care. Respect the dignity of every person and every role. Treat everyone with respect. Show kindness. Don’t fake caring. Don’t attempt to be “efficient” with people.

Stephen Covey: Season 4 – Episode 32 – Second Wave – Relationship Trust

Welcome back to another blog, people! We’re getting into another phase of Stephen Covey’s Speed of Trust, and this one is going to be a very enticing one. It’s time to start getting into the relationship aspect of things and breakdown what behaviors are.

The truth is that in every relationship — personal and professional — what you do has far greater impact than anything you say. You can say you love someone — but unless you demonstrate that love through your actions, your words become meaningless. You can say you want to engage in win-win negotiation — but unless your behavior shows that you really mean it, you will come across as insincere. You can say your company puts the customer first. You can say that you recognize people as your most important asset. However, unless you actually do them, your words will not build trust; in fact, they will destroy it.

 

You have to build it. A lot of people ask “how can I do it.”

Well, remember the caring person thing? If you’re not a caring person now — but you desire to be a caring person — then go out and behave in caring ways.

It may take time, but you have to take the initiative.

Building Trust Accounts

Remember my famous blog “the Emotional Bank Account?” Yeah, these are similar to what Sean Covey’s dad had written about in his book 30 years ago. Let’s go over them.

Each Trust Account is unique

Recognizing uniqueness can help you build each account more effectively. A 12-year-old’s account will be astonishingly different from a mid-20’s guy.

All deposits and withdrawals are not created equal.

Often the little things can be disproportionately large. Getting an email from someone about a natural disaster or some type of imminent danger would be much different from forgetting your partner’s birthday.

What constitutes a “deposit” to one person may not to another.

I had a situation rise that was similar to this. One of my friend’s thought staying out late would be a deposit if I’m bonding with other people, but I considered that to be a significant withdrawal.

Listen to “Stephen Covey: Season 4 – Episode 32 – Second Wave – Relationship Trust” on Spreaker.

Stephen Covey’s Speed of Trust: Season 4 – Episode 23 – The Final ‘S’ in Tasks

The biggest questions of a lifetime for business owners. You know, I was thinking about the time Jack Ma had to fire employees because of the problems he was having with Ali Baba. Through what Napoleon Hill has said, “Applied Faith,” he was able to see things through and work his way out of the rut, making a billion (and soon-to-be trillion) dollar empire. Here are your questions.

The biggest questions of a lifetime for business owners. You know, I was thinking about the time Jack Ma had to fire employees because of the problems he was having with Ali Baba. Through what Napoleon Hill has said, “Applied Faith,” he was able to see things through and work his way out of the rut, making a billion (and soon-to-be trillion) dollar empire. Here are your questions.

  • How effective is your current style in approaching problems and opportunities and interacting with others?
  • Does your approaching facilitate or get in the way of accomplishing what needs to be done?
  • What can you do to improve the way in which you go about doing things?

Lots of ideas came to mind about how well I handle situations. Room for improvement is wide-open, and I need to start feeling things gaps ASAP.

I can get considerably better when it comes to approaching problems. Example, there was an issue at an old job whereas a guy called me out in a number of ways. I shouldn’t have taken that lightly, and even more, I could’ve forwarded the emails and voice messages he had sent me to the owner. Regardless, because he’s white in a very pro-white country, he would’ve gotten a free-pass. But allowing people to get away with unruly behavior is even worse.

When it comes to interacting with others, I’m almost certain that I do an incredible job in that area because that’s one of my strongest points. I pick up energy signals very easily, and this is very important because if people come to me with jobs, I should be able to point them in the right direction of a good teacher, rather than one that would just tarnish my reputation.

An example would be a new employee (or new ones every week) at my job on the weekend. It’s none of my business, but because I’m good at picking up energy, there’s one specific new teacher that has “HORRIBLE” written all over him. If you guys listened/read my blogs from early last year, you’ll know exactly what I’m talking about. I don’t give a second look or anything to these teachers. I don’t introduce myself because they’ve been the bane of my existence here. If they’re not someone who has ideas or anything, why even bother? Most of them complain or say some very sick things that pertains to under-age girls (yeah, welcome to Thailand). So, OQP (Only Quality People).

That’s in the world of business.

When it comes to my entrepreneurial world, I can seriously learn to get better at appropriating time slots for when I should be on social media. I feel if I leave notifications on all day, I can lose maybe 1-1.5 hours. So, as of today, I’ve turned them off and they’ve helped me considerably. The only messages I receive are of importance from my graphic designer. Facebook messages in the morning while commuting (anytime while commuting) is enough. Other apps at the same time. No FB at home or during my core hours.

This is how you can identify what’s working and what isn’t….so I suggest all of you do the same with the questions above!

Podcast

Stephen Covey’s Speed of Trust: Season 4 – Episode 22 – The K in Tasks

Welcome back to another Stephen Covey blog with lots of explanations! Here are some questions for you to answer.

What is your current level of knowledge in your specific field?

What are you doing to NOT stay current?

What other areas of knowledge are you pursuing?

So, lately I’ve been having some hot sweats — hot sweats of the feelings I used to feel doing things that I absolutely hated to do. 2004, a year where I was DEAD BORED with school. 2005, watching TV all day long and not learning a damn things while saturating myself with sports and other things to keep me busy and away from making rash decisions.

Hell, even when I lived in Australia, or on those boring Saturdays and Sundays off from work…..it was a life of misery, while I was going to college.

Throughout my life, I was never asked about my purpose. I was never asked “do you really like what you’re doing?”

Karen Mulcahy, an ex-university professor, asked me “why do you want to become a dental assistant?”

I replied, “well, I’ve never had a nice smile and I would love to change others smiles because that’s the first thing we see.

First part was wrong, I’ve always had a nice smile, excluding my bottom incisors. However, I didn’t have the ability to change smiles as a dental assistant.

As a dental assistant, what could I have done to improve my knowledge and skills? Oh, ok…let me learn the different types of softwares related to the dental field and possible get paid more.

Get paid more….and then?

It was a dead-end job from the beginning and I was able to escape the rat race of just saying, “let me just making money for the weekend and travel twice a year…enjoy my life only twice a year before going back to a horrendous career.”

Some of you are in that career right NOW! Doing the same tasks and hating your life. I’m inviting you to take the leap.

For those of you who have already made the leap, ask yourself your questions about your specific field.

I was just having a conversation with another English Language tutor, and she said she wanted to go back to university to learn about business, reading, and writing — three things that I’ve learned ON MY OWN. The information is everywhere. I improved my knowledge of subjects taught out here in Thailand and was paid more for doing so.

That was 4 years ago. Since then, the amount of knowledge I have now is unbelievable and continuing to increase.

Don’t Stay Current

You stay current and you will lose. Apple has taken catastrophic hits. Sure, 245 billion in hard cash, but they’re now #3 in the world because they’re no longer innovating and hiking prices even more…with the same functions. This is a dead company.

If you’re not looking 5-10 years ahead and not innovating, you will fall way behind.

The areas I continue pursuing is insight and revelation. I want to continue learning and learning from people as much as possible because i know with experiences and collaboration brings some of the greatest heights of anyone’s life. That will be talked about in another blog, but please take these questions into account and start jotting down ideas.

Listen to “Stephen Covey’s Speed of Trust: Season 4 – Episode 22 – The K in Tasks” on Spreaker.

Stephen Covey’s Speed of Trust: Season 4 – Episode 20 – The A in Tasks

Here’s the blog on the A in TASKS.

Let’s kick it off with important questions.

  • What are your attitudes about work?
  • ABout life?
  • About learning?
  • About yourself, your capabilities, and your opportunities to contribute?
  • Are there more productive attitudes and paradigms I could embrace that would help me create better results?

Huge questions for everyone to ask themselves.  See, the majority of us have a poor attitude about work.  Let me give you an example.  At the beginning of 2018, I was shoulder-shrugging my old job off.  I would go into my classes and not put ANYTHING into my lessons because one, I knew I was gone.  Two, my students weren’t putting any effort into what I was trying to teach them, so why would I even try?

Poor attitude, right? Sure….I was aware of it, but I was a month away from resigning and finally, that was the end.

However, I get paid about 15% less at the job I’m at right now.  Do I have that same attitude? Nope. Why? Because I love what I do.  I have clients around Bangkok that pay far more, so why would I still work at a place that’s unworthy of me, my purposes in life, and my goals? Because I love my students.

It’s not about the money….everything is about perception.

Are you ambitious about learning? I constantly buy new English learning books everyday to help better not only my teachings, but my students who receive the information.

I’m proactive about contributing, thus why I have a podcast that I’ve been paid only once in the past 3 years (and it just came a week ago).  I’m giving out this information essentially for free, but also paying to give it out.  See, it’s all about perspective.

Let’s look at some changes to our language.

It’s all about reactive versus proactive, right?

I have to go to work             or              I’m genuinely excited to go to work. 

I work like crazy and live for the weekends. 

or

I have a balanced life in which work, recreation, and rich relationships are all important parts. 

 

Stephen Covey’s Speed of Trust: Season 4 – Episode 16 – Choose Abundance

Abundance means that there is enough for everybody. The opposite –scarcity — says that there is only so much to go earound, and if you get it, I won’t. While scarcity may be a reality in some areas (such as competitive sports or forced grading curves), in most of the important things in life – such as love, success, energy, results, and trust — abundance is not only a reality, it is an attractor and generator of even more.

Stephen Covey’s Speed of Trust

Extremely hard to believe, huh? I just went through a breakup, and although it feels like I have moved on, I’m not accepting that the other half has moved on, too. It’s almost as if I don’t want her to move on. It’s almost if I want her to regret making the decision to move on.

Ridiculous, huh?

Back in 2009, and with the last probably REAL relationship I had, I did everything it took to be ahead of her — to act more happy and everything would eventually follow. She got into a rebound relationship, and because I still hadn’t moved on at the time, I was crushed. Beyond belief.

Abundance, in terms of love, is something that is very hard for me to see. However, the other areas are definitely everywhere around us.

Questions

  • Do I believe that if i love other people, my own supply of love will be replenished — or diminished?
  • Do I believe that there’s room for other people to see things differently than I do…..and still be right?
  • Do I believe that, whatever my economic circumstances, I can share with and benefit others?

I love this following story about Oprah Winfrey.

Some role models show us clearly that whatever our past experience — even if it includes a painful and unfair childhood — we can rescript ourselves to create abundance in our lives and in the lives of others.

Consider Oprah Winfrey, who was raised in rural Mississippi by her grandparents and abused by a relative as a youth. She chose to reframe her circumstances and rise above them.

 

“I don’t think of myself as a poor deprive ghetto girl who made good. I think of myself as somebody who from an early age knew I was responsible for myself, and i had to make good.”

 

“You should not be satisfied with being a victim, nor with being a survivor. You should aim to be a conqueror. there is an extraordinary quality of spirit that leads one to aspire to conquering rather than surviving. I hope you discover that spirit in yourself.”

Stephen Covey

These powerful role models serve us as powerful practitioners.

Listen to “Stephen Covey’s Speed of Trust: Season 4 – Episode 16 – Choose Abundance” on Spreaker.

Stephen Covey’s Speed of Trust: Season 4 – Episode 15 – Examine and Refine your Motives

Guys, it’s a human tendency to rationalize lies. This often happens when we try justifying our intent with others. There were plenty of times where I tried justifying who I was as a teacher and individual…..however, the guy sitting across from me didn’t want to hear a cent. Obviously because he had a hidden agenda in terms of trying to get back at me. Nonetheless, let’s try some questions that you can ask yourself regularly.

In an interaction with a child: Are my actions motivated by genuine care and love? Am I really seeking the best interests of this child? Am I humble enough to admit it if I am wrong? Or am I really trying to impose my will on this child?

In an interaction with a spouse: Am I sincerely listening to what my spouse has to say? Am I genuinely open to his/her influence? Do I understand where he/she is coming from? Or am I focused on explaining my point of view, being right, or getting my way?

In an interaction with a work team: Am I quick to see and acknowledge the contribution of every team member? Am I focused on a “win” for the entire team? Or am I primarily focused on my own “win” — on being the “hero,” on being recognized for my own ideas?

In a business deal: Do I genuinely want what’s best for us both? Do I really understand what constitutes a “win” for the other party? Have I clearly thought through and can I express what constitutes a “win” for me? Am I open to synergy and third alternatives? Or do I really want to “win,” regardless of what happens to the other party?

 

Stephen Covey’s Speed of Trust

Five Adaptations – My Story

  1. Why am I feeling unappreciated and undervalued? Because I don’t get paid what I should get paid and I never get a “thank you,” rather a complaint, which is blown up.
  2. Why do I think they don’t see the good work I do? Because they focus only on the negative rather than the results.
  3. What makes me think they’re focused on that? Because two weeks ago I had two, two-faced students say the most egregious things about me and requested a change of teacher.
  4. Why do you think they said that? I wish I had a clue, but I don’t.
  5. Why would I talk to my boss about it, or what should I do in the future to protect myself. Keep it as professional as possible, document everything, and never take anyone for granted.

These are the five whys you can use to figure out the real intent.

If your intent is based on principles (caring, contributing, seeking mutual benefit, acting in the best interest of others), it will bring you trust dividends: if it’s not, you’re going to pay a tax — which is what happened when my students ultimately snubbed me.

Three Ideas by Stephen Covey

First, make sure you have identified the principles that will bring the results you want.

Second, recognize that you may need help to create this deep inner change — and seek it.

Third, behave your way into the person you want to be. Example, if you’re not now a person who cares much about others — but you have the desire to be — then act on that desire.

Listen to “Stephen Covey’s Speed of Trust: Season 4 – Episode 15 – Examine and Refine your Motives” on Spreaker.

Stephen Covey’s Speed of Trust: Season 4 – Episode 14 – The Trustee Standard

When we believe people truly are acting in our best interest, we tend to trust them. When we believe that they are not acting in our best interest, we do not trust them.

Let me give you an example. I had always gone to a suit shop in old Bangkok. I loved going there to warp my wardrobe into what it should have been. After the last couple of times, I felt that one of the guys there was going for a quick money grab. He wasn’t acting in the best interest of me. So, one day I went there to pick up some clothes and he was pressuring the hell out of me to buy an additional suit. No eye contact, no nothing. He even charged me almost double for the suit, which I would’ve gotten for a much cheaper price if the other guy was there.

I remember being on the skytrain, angry, and I messaged the guy who had taken the day off saying, “could you please cancel my last order I put in. That guy hustled me for my money and this is why I don’t come as often as I did.”

That was probably March/April of 2017. I never went back, and yes, I still do have 300$ worth of clothes to be picked up (and I will go back to pick it up and close the deal), but since they didn’t act in my best interest, I’m certainly not going to do the opposite.

How to Improve Intent

Fundamentally, intent is a matter of the heart. It’s something you can’t fake — at least not for long. But it is something you can definitely work on and improve.

Some people genuinely have poor intent. Though they may not be aware of it or even admit it, deep inside they seek their own profit, position, or possessions above people, above principle, above everything else.

Others have good intent — they sincerely want to do what’s right and seek the welfare of others — but their expression and execution of intent is poor. Though we may not realize it, most of us deal with at least some degree of challenge in both of these areas. If we’re really honest, we have to admit that sometimes our motives are not completely pure. Sometimes we approach situations with hidden agendas — even tiny ones — that keep us from being appropriately transparent with others. Sometimes we manifest behaviors that don’t demonstrate caring, openness, and concern. To whatever degree these challenges are part of our lives, we are being taxed, both personally and professionally.

It’s time to get into those accelerators on the next episode.

Listen to “Stephen Covey’s Speed of Trust: Season 4 – Episode 14 – The Trustee Standard” on Spreaker.