Stephen Covey’s Action Plan on Trust

As promised in my podcast, this is the action plan with behaviors 1-13 and here’s an excerpt, along with the action plan, so you can figure out what needs to be done intrinsically.

In the beginning of this 13 behaviors section, I used a personal challenge for you to make this material highly relevant and actionable by identifying two relationships — one professional and one in personal — in which you wanted to build trust. I said that at the end of the section, I would give you the opportunity to look back, determine which two or three behaviors would make the greatest difference, and create an action plan to create change.

Well, here we are. If you didn’t do it before, I encourage you to do it now. This is where you can make decisions that will build trust, that will transform taxes into dividends, that will improve your relationships with two people, and — geometrically — with many others, as well.

Many people find it helpful to use a chat such as this one below. If this approach works for you, I suggest you start with one relationship. Go over the behaviors. Mark on the continuum where you think you are now with regard to each one. Then go back and circle the two or three behaviors that you feel will make the greatest positive difference.

Identify one or two next steps for each of those behaviors to create change. You may want to use one of the Trust Tips at the end of each chapter, or you may come up with something that will work better in your situation. The key is to make the steps actionable and to make and keep a commitment to yourself to do them.

Then go back and do the same for the second relationship you chose.

As you create your plan, keep in mind that the quickest way to make a withdrawal is to violate a behavior or character; the quickest way to make a deposit is to demonstrate a behavior of competence. This may help you in determining how to most quickly build trust in your situation.

If you prefer to use a different approach to implementation, that’s fine. However, you may still want to look at the chart. It will give you an overview of all 13 Behaviors, including their opposites and counterfeits. It’s a good way to capture a vision of the way high-trust leaders interact with others.

Stephen Covey
BehaviorCurrent PerformanceOpposite/
Counterfeit
Talk Straight___/____/____/____/____/Lie, spin, tell half
truths
Demonstrate
Respect
___/____/____/____/____/Don’t care or don’t
show you care.
Create
Transparency
___/____/____/____/____/Withhold information;
keep secrets;
Right Wrongs___/____/____/____/____/Don’t admit or
repair mistakes
Show Loyalty___/____/____/____/____/Sell others out; take the credit
yourself
Deliver
Results
___/____/____/____/____/Fail to deliver
on activities.
Get Better___/____/____/____/____/Deteriorate; don’t
invest in improvement
Confront
Reality
___/____/____/____/____/Bury your head in the sand;
focus on busywork
Clarify
Expectations
___/____/____/____/____/Assume expectations
or don’t disclose them.
Practice
Accountability
___/____/____/____/____/Don’t take responsibility.
Listen First___/____/____/____/____/Don’t listen; speak first, listen
last.
Keep
Commitments
___/____/____/____/____/Break commitments;
violate promises.
Extend Trust___/____/____/____/____/Withhold trust;
fake trust and then
snoopervise.

Stephen Covey’s Speed of Trust: Season 4 – Episode 6 – The Four Cores

Guys welcome back to another Stephen Covey blog/podcast, and today is a follow up from what we’ve already done with the questionnaire (last week). 

So, each part in the questionnaire corresponds to one of the “4 Cores of Credibility.”  These are the foundational elements that make you believable, both ot yourself and to others. 

So, when it comes to integrity, it basically means honesty.  It’s walking your talk.  Do you live up to your values and beliefs? Or do you do opposite of what you say. 

Core 2: Intent

The second core deals with issues of intent.  This has to do with our motives, our agendas, and our resulting behavior.  Trust grows when our motives are straightforward and based on mutual benefit — in other words, when we genuinely care not only for ourselves, but also for the people we interact with, lead, or serve.  When we suspect a hidden agenda from someone or we don’t believe they are acting in our best interests, we are suspicious about everything they say and do. 

Both integrity and intent are matters of character.

Stephen Covey’s Speed of Trust

This happens a lot in my life because I have a tendency of always saying to myself, “is this real?”  Came across a lady on the street last night and she was super friendly.  It didn’t make any sense, and I truly believed that she had a hidden agenda. She was trying to exploit me somehow, someway, and I was right. 

Core 3: Capabilities

The third core deals with issues of capabilities.  These are the abilities that have inspire confidence — our talens, attitudes, skills, knowledge, and style.  They are the means we use to produce results.  A family doctor might have integrity and his motives might be good, but unless he’s trained and skilled to perform the task at hand (brain surgery, for example) he’ll be lacking in credibility in that area.  Capabilities also deal with our ability to establish, grow, extend, and restore trust. 

Stephen Covey’s Speed of Trust

Core 4: Results

The fourth core deals with issues around results.  This refers to our track record, our performance, our getting the right things done.  If we don’t accomplish what we are expected to do, it diminishes our credibility.  On the other hand, when we achieve the results we promised, we establish a positive reputation of performing, of being a produce, and our reputation precedes us. 

Stephen Covey’s Speed of Trust

And these are the cores.  Remember, everyone, each area is of equal importance.  Example, someone who has great integrity, good intent and a great track record my lack capabilities.  Another person who has great integrity, capable and produces excellent results may have selfishness and doesn’t care about you.  

In any case, you won’t fully trust that person in any situation. So, in order to visualize the importance of all cores is by through the metaphor of a tree.  Integrity is the root of the tree which everything else grows.  Intent becomes more visible after you establish the character, which is just below the soil.  It’s essentially the big trunk the pokes its head out.  The capabilities are the branches and the capacities that enable us to produce.  Results are the fruits.  

So, with the being said, we’re going to have to start going through the cores

Podcast

Coaching Session 003: Being Creative

So, I was asked this fascinating question just recently by one of my content writers.  She asked me how to be creative and how we can continue being creative.  Well, we’re living in a world that’s changing literally every year, month, week, day.  The YouTube’s and Apple’s of the world can ultimately fall apart just as Toys R Us and other massive chains in different countries plummeted.  Well, if we take a look at my ESL podcast and how I’ve been teaching in Thailand, this is probably the only way I can relate to this post.

The Initiation

When I first moved to Thailand, I was making a sloppy $600 USD a month.  Now, the teacher told me I would get paid $66 dollars less because I was black, too.  What was I doing at this school? Teaching younger kids — which required a lot of creativity.  That’s basically it. For five months I didn’t have any personal development and didn’t try learning useful skills that will make me a hot commodity.

Second Job

I moved up to $1000 dollars a month, which is an 80% increase, teaching technical college students.  Did I learn anything while I was there? Absolutely not…but with 5 months experience, this gave me a significant pay raise that I never thought I would get.

The Reality

When I finally moved outside of Bangkok, not only did I make 2k USD a month, but I first taught TOEIC (a test preparation course to enable the student to apply for higher paying jobs based on their English language literacy).  I learned to teach 4-skills (reading, writing, speaking, listening), academic writing, IELTS, business English and other facets.  When they saw I was an excellent speaker, they wanted me to create a new course that catered to conversation, which was a success beyond a success.  I got gigs teaching at the top-5 companies within these borders (email writing, business English and other areas), and when this happened, jealousy began growing.

Then I knew I was on the right path. The more I learned, the more I earn.

In 2015, I created a YouTube video that now has over 9k views…..never did I think that would happen.  It wasn’t until earlier this year that I had the idea, “hey, if there are lots of people viewing my videos YouTube, how about I make a podcast and see where it goes? Bingo! From there, my podcast soared over the last couple of months.  I began creating 1-minute videos on Instagram and my Facebook page — resulting in BIG HITS.  I turned that into online coaching, which I do live on the weekends and set up the refreshment course via YouTube.

And Then

A coach for Toyota, who has traveled the world and who I’ve been teaching the past three weeks (TOEFL) spoke to me for twenty minutes at the end of class saying, “you have e-test, e-learning, coaching, and refreshing).  While he was talking to me, I realized that I was unconsciously doing two of them already (coaching and refreshing) and it has been STELLAR since beginning two weeks ago.

The Creative

If I can create an e-test for my students and provide specialized courses in the different sectors of English, this could be the new-age part of learning.  If you haven’t already heard, universities are 1 trillion in debt and now people are realizing that university, is indeed, a scam.  In ten years time, we could be learning in virtual reality.  The language centers here in Thailand and all over the world, which are my competitors, can no longer provide a book and a “teacher” to teach from a book (super easy to do). They’ll have to become more creative.

So, how do I stay relevant? Integration of sophisticated lessons that will capture the imaginations of my students, making them better members of society while focusing on their core genius.  Professors around the world teach what’s only in books, and that will all be gone once AI is implemented and we no longer need to memorize information that’s useless.

Being creative is doing exactly what the big companies, which have failed, didn’t do.  Continue evolving and providing your customers with more things and innovate your technology to make life easier.  Jack Ma says “find a need and fill it.”

If you had known about Buzzsprout in the beginning of the year, you would know how garbage it was.  This platform, which podcasters can use to host, was completely useless compared to SoundCloud (a now “pay for plays” platform).  I didn’t know the metrics, who was listening, the last x amount of plays, or ANYTHING.  It was generic as hell compared to sites like Spreaker — a site I can see all the sources on.  However, I’m able to schedule my ESL podcasts now, transcript for little to no money (compared to hosting sites which charge 10x more), and I can put chapter markers in my podcast — a feature that has been invented on any other platform.

Buzzsprout knows in order for it to stay afloat, it has to continue evolving. The moment it began to grow complacent (at the beginning of the year), that was beginning of its downfall.

Always continue making life easier for your customers. Period.

Podcast

 

Lewis Howes: The Alpha Mask Introduction!

After so many months of not reading this book (and now realizing that I’m finished with the Gary Vee book), I’ve reverted my attention back to one of the most splendidly terrifying books out there that’s almost certain to put all men in some of the most uncomfortable places.  I present you the ALPHA MASK!

“You’re in a bar and some guy gets rude. You’re in a meeting and someone other than you is getting all the attention. You’re trying to talk your phone bill down, but the guy on the other end of the line is a jerk about it.

How does this make you feel? How do you respond? For a lot of men, the answer is simple: It challenges their very identity as a man. It makes them feel less than. Since they see themselves as alpha males—the top dogs—they simply cannot handle the downgrade in status.

But here’s the danger—in some of the situations, the degree to which you are assertive and display your full alpha colors could meaningfully change what happens, for better or worse. It might affect whether you are able to walk away in one piece.”

Excerpt From: Lewis Howes. “The Mask of Masculinity.” iBooks.

BOOM! Omg! I mean, when I read this, I laughed out loud! How many times, especially throughout our daily lives, are we accosted by this insidious behavior?

Ok, I’ve been seeing a lot of trolls on Gary Vee’s LinkedIn who literally argue against everything he writes.  You got the “labelers,” who call themselves “CEO, founder, manager, and other ridiculously outlandish and egotistical titles, who berate Gary Vee with the most senseless antics and phrases imaginable.  Remedial yokels from another dimension.

A long time ago, I was holding a sign, peacefully, inside McCarran International airport when I was approached by a group of clowns…..those who call themselves “McDonalds Managers,” and one specific man said, “omg who prepped you?” It was like three back-to-back-to-back questions that sounded like 21 questions.  He did this because he wanted to have that managerial feel.  The feeling of superiority — and this is why Americans are so WAY-IN-OVER-THEIR-HEADS because they let titles, which don’t go to the grave with them, get to them.

You got the shady clubbing men who go to clubs in groups to stalk “prey” (yes, I’m saying that in a very mysogynistic way because they do treat women like objects).  After they make eye-contact with another one who’s trying to gain power over the other, he approaches him by saying, “wtf are you looking at?” Brawl happens; orbital bones are broken; people are slammed; concussions are given.

It’s head-scratching, isn’t it? Males, even here in Thailand, have a tendency of beating women.

“Well, getting everything they want is actually third on their list. First of all, being in control is number one on their list, and that’s emotionally satisfying. The second thing is the alpha type—which we refer to as “the assertive”—the one thing that’s more important to them than actually getting what they want is being respected and making sure that you know everything about what they’re coming from.” – Chris Voss

Excerpt From: Lewis Howes. “The Mask of Masculinity.” iBooks.

“That’s the lesson for me. You might think you’re the big tough alpha male, but you’re actually profoundly weak. It occurs to me that establishing “alphaness” is what drives a lot of outrageous behavior and needless mistakes. When I think about things like gang violence or terrorism or bar fights or abuse, all of them seem to trace back to this need to establish one’s presence or dominance or strength. All of these acts seem to be about men wanting to show off how alpha they are.” – Lewis Howes

Turn Your Car/Commute Into A University On Wheels

Name how many positive radio stations you have in your country.  Go ahead, I’ll wait, patiently.

I’ll give you an insight.  One of the most popular radio stations in America brings different interviewees on the show to degrade, dehumanize, and criticize them.  Yet, their following base is probably the largest in America.

As human beings, we naturally gravitate towards the negative rather than seeing the positive side of everything.

Radio stations, from what Gary Vee has been saying, are almost dead.  YouTube is on the verge of trumping cable TV for the first time EVER…..attention is veering away from things that try to control our minds and society in general.  So, what can you do?

What can you do if radio is finished? What can you do if you’ve had it with the people talking about the Russians, Trump, Chinese, nuclear warheads, etc? Well, it’s like I’ve been doing.  Turning my commute and drive-time into a university.

Let me give you an example.  Upon arriving to KL International Airport, I knew that immigration lines were going to be super long.  Because I’ve been listening to so much Gary Vee, this was primetime for me.  While all everyone was standing in line, giving each other strange stares, I had Gary Vee and Podsessions in my ear, laughing and giving myself brain food.  People were looking at me, and some of them men behind me (oddly), were trying to get my attention by constantly staring at me.

This is what I call “downtime.”

Podcasts such as Jim Kwik, MindValley, Gary Vee and others that are out there that can help you in the personal development world.

There’s an App called “blinkist” (not the best) that reads out book summaries (make sure they’re personal development books or you’re just wasting your time – sorry, fictional junkies) for you.

You can buy audio books or even connect to YouTube and listen to Bob Proctor, Early Nighingale, Tony Robbins, or titans of the personal development realm.

Your commute everyday should be enjoyable and you should be able to feed your mind and make it young again.

While waiting at KL airport this morning in a never-ending line, I put on Jim Kwik for the first time in a few weeks and he “WOWED” me to even write a blog such as this one.  The information he gives me in terms of making my life better is amazing.  Also, one last thing that will lead into another blog.

TEACH WHAT YOU LEARN.

Make your car/commute a university of learning.

You Can’t Win An Argument/The Big Secret of Dealing With People – Part II

This book, which I finished doing sometime last year, has really changed my entire perception on what I can do in regards to handling people, especially in ugly situations.  Here are a couple things I’ve encountered in my daily life over the past couple of months.

Now, I’m doing this two months later because I didn’t want to do it at the time.  One of my proud podcast listeners and I, who lives in America, got into a little bit of a dispute with me over a total miscommunication.

Let’s just put this in dumb-down English.  I told her to call me at a specific time and she called me at an opposite time before blaming me.

The conversation went something like this, “ummmmm I already got the information I needed, but I truly hope you don’t treat me like your Asian friends out there.”  That’s in a very nice tone…it was much uglier than that — of course — an eye-opening experience for myself.

This particular individual reached out to me in regards to teaching abroad, and given my charisma, decided to tell her to phone me from the other side of the planet so I can go over some details.  Well, I told her simply not to call me at night time (my time) and rather her time.  She got confused and then jumped out on me saying, “wait, you didn’t answer your phone because you were watching a movie?”  I said to MYSELF, “regardless if I was or wasn’t, you called me at the wrong time.”

Rather than her admitting that she was wrong, she hurled criticism at me.

Given the fact that this was one of my listeners, I reverted to the Dale Carnegie training manual.

You Can’t Win An Argument

“Why prove to a man he is wrong? Is that going to make him like you? Why not let him save his face? He didn’t ask for your opinion. He didn’t want it. Why argue with him? Always avoid the acute angle.” ”

Excerpt From: Dale Carnegie. “How to Win Friends & Influence People.” iBooks. https://itunes.apple.com/us/book/how-to-win-friends-influence-people/id1237723501?mt=11

Regardless if she was wrong or wasn’t, I now have a brand.  This brand is ultimately going to carry me to the greatest heights in my life because of the constant discipline and beating on my craft.  So while I was sitting on the massage table waiting to be ripped apart, I had a glimpse at how wrong this conversation can go.  How bad it can get and potentially dampen my reputation.

At that exact moment, I knew i was going to win the argument, although I was right.  So, I wrote something like this.

? I’m sorry if you feel that way, but I think this has gotten way blown out of proportion.  I do apologize if you feel that I’ve wasted your time, but there was a miscommunication that happened between us.

However, I’m very excited that you got the information needed to go further with your decision in terms of moving abroad.  Just know that the culture shock is all part of the process.  Everything you go through is going to be eye-opening, but embrace every bit of it.  I wish you the best!

After a full-day, she later responded with a four sentence reply.

There’s no way you can respond to a message like that in a incensed, animosity-filled rant.  She was clarified, dealt, and now that’s the end of it.

The best part about this is if I hadn’t read this wonderful book that was written more than a half a century ago, I would’ve gotten into a heated debate and it would’ve destroyed everything I’ve ever built up to this point.

Just recently I stopped working at a job where I’ve been for four years (and I’m so grateful I’ve left), but I remember getting into a heated debate with a British coordinator who is as pompous as they come.  Everything I’ve said, with proven facts, went in one ear and out the other.  This man, who came all the way to this southeast Asian country to marry a wife and escape his past, wanted to see an African American fail (or “black” man for the lack of better term), and he didn’t succeed – even though he sat there with his bland statistics (ancient way of trying to call someone out).

However, who wins in the end? Again, if I hadn’t known about this book, I would’ve went on a full-on rant and probably would’ve gotten fired.  This man, who has a rapidly deteriorating body, is soon to pass – given the fact that he’s almost 80 years old and still working for $13 an hour.  I have empathy for him, and I would be visibly upset with myself, too, for making the actions such as coming to a developing country in my lonesome.  This particular entry refers back to the Remember No One Ever Kicks A Dead Dog Podcast.

Anywho, these are the ways I handle situations.  From not trying to lose a potential podcast listener, to overcoming vindictive beings who are out to try and making other people’s lives miserable.

Podcast

How To Create A Band of Friends That Will Help Up-Level You

Set aside some time and make a list of people you would like to ask to mentor you.

  • Tony Robbins
  • Lisa Nichols
  • Gary Vee
  • Vishen Lakhiani
  • Tom Bilyeau
  • Les Brown
  • Michael Bernard Beckwith
  • Jim Kwik

It will probably seem daunting at first to contact people and ask for assistance, but it’s easier than you think.  Just recently I messaged Michael Bernard Beckwith to be on my podcast.  Was I scared? No, but it’s a win-win situation for me.  If he replies and we set something up, this will be ASTOUNDING for me; if he doesn’t reply, I still leave without anything.  See, win-win.

You know, when Les Brown started his speaking career in the early 1980’s, he approached Dr. Norman Vincent Peale (who was a world-renowned speaker and publisher).  Not only did Peale talk to Les, but he took him underneath his wings, too, teaching him everything he knew.

Les said, “he spoke more to my heart than to my mind.” Les Brown referred to this because there was a particular individual who said he would never be anything because he got held back + D’s and F’s in school.  However, Peale saw the greatness within Les.

Perhaps like the story above, you just need someone to open doors for you.  It could be someone from the social media platform called LinkedIn, or a friend who knows a friend, or just being around people who are high-energy.

I have mentors everywhere, and I don’t pay for them, either.  Let me tell you how I do it.

There’s a CEO of a crossfit-kinda-gym out here in Bangkok that I’m close to.  Not only am I close to him, but some of the other trainers.  I’ve always said before that “like attracts like,” and this is exactly what he has attracted to his business, which is extraordinary.  The array of personalities and position beings working for him and training is captivating.

So how do I learn from him? Just being around him and all the other trainers makes me incredibly enthusiastic about learning what they know.  He’s also a self-made millionaire, which is extremely rewarding because I’m literally within an arms length from an ultra-successful being.  And what’s more interesting is because he’s so happy and content with life, everyone else around him has that same persona.  Now, there are some people who workout in the gym that are bad energy.  I stay away from them.  However, in my little area right down the street from where I am, it’s team-oriented and so much fun going through absolute HELL.

What I’m trying to say is you don’t have to pay loads of dollars to get a mentor.  You can just pay a bit of a premium membership to get around people who are where you want to be.  If that’s moving to a particular area (while not busting the bank), or walking down the street of where some big shots walk down (like Napoleon Hill did) — that’s the gateway!

You’ll have to do some homework.  Look for mentors who have the kind of well-rounded experience you need to tackle your goal.  When you start seeing a pattern of the same few people being recommended, you know you’ve found that short list.

Also, asking someone who has already done it (because success leaves clues) is the best way to get to the next level.  Media agents, who talk to Gary Vee all the time, ask him “how can I build my own media agency?” It’s funny because Gary Vee always says that he wants his opponents to fail miserably, but that’s not the point.  The point is that he wants to dissect the mind of Gary Vee, just like I wanted to dissect the mind of one of my colleagues that knew so much about everything.

Network Your Way To Success

This could be in terms of mentorship or even just collaborating with others.  My first ever podcast interview was with a stylist and marketing executive from Dallas, Texas.  It took me 18 months to do my first interview.  Since that interview I’ve done 9 others (5 of them this year) alone because I know that could possibly expand my audience.

In terms of other forms of social media, I’ve come up in a lot of different search terms as of late.  There was a speaking agency that searched for me recently on LinkedIn, which raised my eye brows.  Shortly following that, I got a job interview and praise from a school in Indonesia.

The foundation of business and careers are built on relationships, and relationships form when people meet and interact with each other in an authentic way.  Also, I know you’re also aware of the fact that people prefer to do business with people they know, like, and trust.

Just like I recently stated, when you get together with other motivated business owners, there is an opportunity for things like joint ventures, clients leads, partnerships, speaking and writing opportunities, business or asset sales, investment opportunities and much more to emerge.

Creating connections and keeping them in your network is imperative.  Having a personal assistant, graphic designer, sound technician, and even a transcription person on board is critical.  You might not be able to pay for each person, but start small by giving them some important projects (at a one-time fee), and then work your way up to more significant projects.

Getting advice from the likes of Gary Vee and other entrepreneurs WHO HAVE BEEN THER is free.  Everything you’ve heard and read about will be retorted in a different way to you, so don’t be afraid.

https://www.spreaker.com/user/thearseniobuckshow/how-to-create-a-band-of-friends-that-wil

 

Lewis Howes: The Know-It-All Mask – Introduction

“Have you ever noticed how people tend to fill the dead time in a conversation or a meeting by rambling on about some random topic? Have you ever watched someone you work with try to impress the people around them by going on a long rant about something you can’t even pronounce? Have you ever seen someone in an important setting suck the air out of the room by making it all about them? They always have a response, they can’t let anything go, and they have to show you how smart they are.”

Excerpt From: Lewis Howes. “The Mask of Masculinity.” iBooks.

Welcome to the Know-It-All Mask!

Not off the top of my head, but I’ve worked with quiet a few people in the past and present who can just ra-ra-ra the world with their impeccability of BS – LOL. It took me a while to think about it, but there were times I would be around individuals and they can talk about just a bunch of bs that would go on and on when I was in the midst of doing something.  Luckily towards the end of my tenures, I stopped talking to these particular beings, resulting in a lot of free-time.

One of my students, who was a brilliant speaker, said to me, “ummm teacher _________ knows a lot.  He knows everything.” Yeah, he knows everything so much that he doesn’t allow you to speak, huh?

Sometimes you do have to just take the seat in the back, as a teacher, and shut the heck up.

Now, I won’t put his name out there, but obviously there are a lot of entrepreneurs who just don’t shut up and listen, even when interviewing men who have amassed over 50 billion USD over their lifetime.  From philanthropists — to Hedgefund leaders — it just always seems that they need to be the center of attention.  We love talking, especially people who know a lot about everything, but there comes a time when you just have to be a listener.

I’ve done 8 podcast interviews, starting from last year, and I really just allow my guests to speak.  That’s the sole purpose of doing the interview…..you asking the questions and getting the best out of them, such as what Larry King does.  Larry King is a superb interviewer because all of his questions are so centered/focused on the person sitting across from him.

One of the funniest instances I had was four years ago.  I had to go to a meeting at a language center where the staff looked at me in more bad ways than one, and the owner of the language center looked down upon me for even more obvious reasons.  Anywho, I sat in a room with three teachers throwing ideas out there for an English camp, and when I came around to give my two cents (after asking to do so), a teacher by the name of Nicole ran all over me and shot me down.  She wanted to do ALL THE TALKING and then later told me that I tried talking too much during the meeting, although I counted 1-2 sentences in the 30-minute session.  She was absolutely one of those people who would run over me from left to right.  From the first day I met her at one of the worst English camps, to this particular one where the commute was much longer.

She was right about one thing.  I wasn’t changing my mindset about Thai women — and was losing fast.  That’s about it.  Having a strong personality like that around is unbelievably draining.

I need to get much better at listening, too.  I get easily distracted, but now I go back to the previous conversation and ask deeper questions.

“It’s like the line in Eleven Minutes by Paulo Coelho: “That’s what the world is like: People talk as if they know everything, but if you dare to ask a question, they don’t know anything.”
Here’s the thing: If we’re being honest with ourselves, then we’d admit that none of us know anything. I think Coelho would even agree that nobody really knows what the hell they are doing. We’re all just making it up as we go along. ”

Excerpt From: Lewis Howes. “The Mask of Masculinity.” iBooks.

Podcast

New Morning Routine!

This has been a long time coming, but this absolutely super-charges my morning like no other morning has before!

It all starts with the evening though.  If I don’t have a successful evening and sleep after 9:30pm, it’ll throw a curveball at my mornings and I’ll have to take out one of the above, which could be detrimental.

Anywho, let’s get into these pictures.

MindValley Podcast

So, I’ve been a loyal follower of MindValley for the longest and absolutely love Vishen as a speaker.  He speaks so much truth and has written excellent books – all while creating a 300 person company that creates courses for people worldwide.  This is an amazing humanity + company; and in addition, they have a podcast!  The podcasts features some of the best speakers around the world and my absolute favorite, without any doubt, is Lisa Nichols.  The Lisa Nichols podcast on MindValley’s podcast is the one where she’s in Cancun giving a guided meditation.  This is the first thing I listen to upon waking up because I’m still in the “dream consciousness.”  If I can have incredible feelings, especially of Joy in that state, I set my soul on fire!.

Glenn Harold

Immediately following that, I love doing my guided meditation.  At this time, I’m hoping that I’m pretty much wide awake so I don’t fall back to sleep.  If I am, I can focus much more on the affirmations and guidance.  My favorite one for the mornings is the “Procrastination” one, because after the program is finished, I’m so focused with my morning tasks.  The ones I use to go to sleep are often Solfeggio, which is an ancient, 6-tone scale used in the recordings.

After that, I officially wake-up with my energy higher than ever because I’m focused on pure gratitude.  I then go to YouTube and put on a specific video whereas a man is stating affirmations over a 15-minute video.  I put this on my bose speaker and go into the kitchen to take some immune support, joint-support, and Thermobond (Herbalife) tablets.

I take a pre-workout (depends if I’m working out) and hop into the shower, giving grace to everything in my life.  This lasts from about 5:15am – 6am.  After that, I can tackle the world.

 

Lewis Howes: Invincible Mask – What Can You Do Right Now?

A lot of people do big things or risky things to get the attention of others.  Remember at the beginning I talked about one of my students’ brother who slammed into a pillar at high speeds, intoxicated and ultimately killing himself.  He was unrecognizable after it happened.  Before he got on his bike, he told everyone that he was safe to drive, although he was completely inebriated.  He was going welllll over the speed limit and resulted in him no longer being able to live.

A many of these “van” boys drive at top speeds with spoilers off, trying to get the attention of women on the streets.  This gives them that since of invincibility and that’s why Thailand, by percentage, has the highest traffic fatality in the WORLD.  These adrenaline junkies are always looking for the next thrill.

So what can you do? What if you stole, or do things that could question the law just to get the attention of women? More importantly, what’s available if you take off the mask?

A fulfilled and healthy life span
Deeper relationships
Self-esteem
True courage
The permission to just be and not constantly do
A sense of belonging

Ask yourself these questions

What is valuable to me?

Friendships.  That invincible mask that Billy had on — I had on, too.  I would treat my best friend Andre like crap over the years, and after my run yesterday, he spilled the beans on how I treated them from a “funny” aspect.  However, I didn’t look at it as funny.  I was embodying anger from when Billy use to treat me like crap, so I wanted to dish out those feelings, too.

Andre is everything to me.  The most valuable friendship I have today.  When he speaks, I absolutely listen and take thought to it.

What do I value about my life?

I honestly need to stop playing the “black” card, as the Irish teacher told me.  I love that he’s in my face about it, because he shows me how much of a magnificent being I can truly become.  This is why I love the fact that I am “different.”  Just last night I was thinking to myself, “oh man! Look at all of these anglo men in the picture of this company that sent me those jobs three days ago.  No wonder I can’t get the job!”  Self-doubt.  I still have that lingering deep within my bloodlines, and it’s something I need to address immediately.

What am I looking for in these activities?

Can I see the true value in friendships and myself?

Can I get those things elsewhere in my life?

Absolutely NOT.  Once I’m gone, I’m gone forever.

Additional Questions In The Podcast