Wheel of Life: October 2018 Edition – Closing Out The Year

Another month, another close.  Yes, it’s been a year with far more ups than downs, but the closing is coming to an end.

How will you leave your mark?

For those of you tuning in for the first time, this is a podcast that’s for people who are willing to identify what areas of life are their strengths and which ones they’ve been neglecting.  Here are the categories.

  • Personal development
  • Physical environment
  • Romantic relationships
  • Health
  • Wealth
  • Career
  • Fun & Hobbies
  • Family & Friends

Rate yourself from 1-10 in each category and be brutally honest about yourself.  Once you understand what areas are suffering, now you’re consciously aware and can make a change.  Here are not only my categories, but what I need to improve in.

Improvement Stages Launch

Normally I’ve talked about my main scores followed by explanation, but I want to see where I can improve.  It’s not about becoming a perfectionist, but improving.

Physical Environment – *3

So, in terms of my physical environment, I believe that it can increase significantly.  First and foremost, my separate projects outside my main place of work are great.  A turning point happened at my job where someone “bitched” at me over something that isn’t even worth repeating (ok, it was about writing on a back of a sheet of paper), but it made me realize “maybe this place doesn’t deserve a teacher like me?”  When she did this, I scratched my head and said, “I’m not going to get my visa until early next year…and that’s if I’m still here.”

That’s called a yellow flag, folks.  Never fully commit when you have nastiness happening.

I’m now cancelling a lot of my availability with the job — because I CAN.  I’m also focusing on my main projects, but that and a couple of blackouts at my condo has hampered the everlasting 10 you would see on a continuous basis.

Physical Environment – *2

I could’ve increased my personal development by a large margin if I just know how to end my day.

I’ve been scuffling and trying to figure out an evening routine that’s suitable for m Because I finish work so ridiculously late, it’s very hard for me to end my day effectively (no excuses.  It all deals with my phone.  If I’m able to listen to affirmations or listen to my “calm” application, which has some nice story-telling to put me in a good state of mind, I win.  However, I haven’t been able to do that.

So, there are several things that I will implement. Tune into my podcast down below for that!

Career – *1.5

Honestly, I’m on the right track.  The comments, the love, the support, the things I’m attracting…but my actions are still not showing that I’m hungry for my ebook and webinar launch.

Wealth – *5

This was the category that made me upset.  I should be making a solid figure per month at my day job, but I’m not — STILL.  So, what can I do to buck the trend? In the podcast!

Because I don’t want to make this long extra long, I decided put everything into my podcast down below to here how I’m able to cope with things that aren’t working.

Podcast

Interviewee #20 – Perry Power – The Art of Storytelling

With a history of sexual abuse and losing his father just over a year ago, Perry has managed to use these dark times and turn it into lightness in order to inspire others to do the same. Believing that our ‘mess is our message’, Perry walks us through how we each have a unique story and hidden power, which we need to find in order to become the best version of ourselves.

Get in touch with Perry Power of the UK

– About the art of storytelling.

 

Links:

 

Things we discussed:

  • Introduction by Perry Power.
  • How Perry started it all?
  • Sharing about Perry’s childhood.
  • Deciding to talk about sexual abuse.
  • Sharing about dark times in an individual’s life.
  • Talking about a man’s ego.
  • Sharing your grief.
  • Talking about struggles in life.
  • The power of being vulnerable.
  • Talking about anger.
  • Sharing about how to shift a mindset about being yourself.
  • Talked about his first FB video.
  • The power of sharing.
  • The power of storytelling.
  • How you tell your story.
  • How old were you when you first started personal development?
  • What did personal development teach you?
  • Hate and forgiveness.
  • Talking about your history of sexual abuse.
  • You need some chapters to your storytelling.
  • The defining moment in your life and in your storytelling.
  • Perfecting your storytelling.
  • You need a flow like a slide in your storytelling.
  • What do you want to accomplish and what are you building?

 

 

Thank you for listening!

 

Thank you so much for joining me for this podcast. Please do write down some feedbacks and comments. Please do share this podcast on your social media.

 

Links:

 

Stephen Covey’s Synergistic Communication: Foreword & Classroom Synergy

Phew, another golden chapter from one of the most golden-led books in the realm of personal development.

When you communicate synergistically, you are simply opening your mind and heart and expressions to new possibilities, new alternatives, new options.

You’re not sure when you engage in synergistic communication how things will work out or what the end will look like, but you do have an inward sense of excitement and security and adventure, believing that it will be significantly better than it was before.

Boom! Now, I’m going to relate to a particular group of people who are finding it extremely hard to open their mind and heart to new possibilities — Americans.

With what I talked about yesterday in terms of what’s happening around the world, America is in desperate need of help — period.  Roseanne Barr, who was a sitcom actress, spouted and spewed some hateful remarks towards an African American.  Americans on one side said, “ohhh, that’s not racist! That’s not this! That’s not that!” completely shoving aside the fact that if they had listened empathically, and I mean with empathy, they’ve could’ve opened up a new side of themselves.  A side that’s so desperately needed in America today with the racial issues that are making waves on the nasty, WMD platforms (weapons of mass distraction).

Many people have not really experienced even a moderate degree of synergy in their family life or in other interactions.  They’ve been trained and scripted into defensive and protective communications or into believing that life or other people can’t be trusted.

And as you can see, this is why so many barriers are created in the world.

This represents one of the great tragedies and wastes in life, because so much potential remains untapped — completely undeveloped and unused.  Ineffective people live day after day with unused potential.  They experience synergy only in small, peripheral ways in their lives.

They may have memories of some unusually creative experiences, perhaps in athletics, where they were involved in a real team spirit for a period of time.  or perhaps they were in an emergency situation where people cooperated to an unusually high degree and submerged ego and pride in an effort to save someone’s life or produce a solution to a crisis.

To many, such events may seem unusual, almost out of character with life, even miraculous.  But this is not so.  These things can be produced regularly, consistently, almost daily in people’s lives.

Classroom Synergy

I’ll never forget a university class I taught in leadership philosophy and style.  We were about three weeks into a semester when, in the middle of a presentation, one person started to relate some very powerful personal experiences which were both emotional and insightful.  A spirit of humility and reverence fell upon the class — reverence toward this individual and appreciate for his courage.

We abandoned the old syllabus, the purchased textbooks and all the presentation plans, and we set up new purposes and projects and assignments.  We became so excited about what was happening that in about three more weeks, we all sensed an overwhelming desire to share what was happening with others.

We decided to write a book containing our learnings and insights on the subject of our study — principles of leadership.  Assignments were changed, new projects undertaken, new teams formed.  People worked much harder than they ever would have in the original class structure.

Out of this experience emerged an extremely unique, cohesive, and synergistic culture that did not end with the semester.

I’ve had a many of experiences like this that I have spoken about in my podcast down below.

https://www.spreaker.com/user/thearseniobuckshow/stephen-covey-s-synergistic-communicatio

University of Hard Knocks

Back in 2008, I decided to team up with my best friend and moved into a gorgeous apartment on the edge of Las Vegas near the Air Force base.  My friend was fresh out of the Navy and I was doing work-study and a summer course back at the College of Southern Nevada.  In the first month or so, he was normally around for the most part.  I started to become increasingly involved in a long-distance relationship with a girl from Japan, and he stated that’s when I began to change.  It was hard to get any kind of responsibility out of him because he paid things late and never did chores around the house.  After two months, he was rarely home.  He would play beer-pong every night with a bunch of “loser;” and one night  in August changed our relationship forever.  Apparently some escorts were at a beer-pong outing one evening and he ended up being so intoxicated that he went back with them to their place.  His money, wallet, credit cards and everything was gone.  He couldn’t pay the monthly bill on his six-week fresh Ford Mustang and they came to repossess it the next day.  I saw him go from an amazing achievement, to an unbelievable disaster in the matter of weeks.

Welcome to the University of Hard Knocks.

Yes, both him and I got evicted and I ended up moving back home with my mother.  The friendship was in turmoil, then got completely destroyed during the month of September after an argument over lies.  S*** happens.

However, in saying all of that, I took 100% responsibility for everything that had happened.  People would point fingers and say, “well, Satomi, from Japan, visited and sent the relationship between you and Andre into a complete whirlwind.” No, Andre sent himself and only himself into a complete whirlwind after the “escort” disaster.  Satomi opened the door within my mind to travel abroad, as she was put in my life to do so.

I’m challenging all of you to do the same thing.  Take the loss.  Take the L.

Today is graduation day! From this day forward, choose to be 100 percent responsible for your life. Eliminate all of your excuses. Embrace the fact that you are freed by your choices, as long as you assume personal responsibility for them.
It’s time to make the choice to take control.

Your Secret Weapon Is Your Scorecard

Podcast

https://www.spreaker.com/user/thearseniobuckshow/the-university-of-hard-knocks-time-to-be

One Year Ago & What Reshaped & Changed The Trajectory of My Life

I was having some Spicy Basil Chicken and vegetables before someone walked into my room and brought something up about my podcast.  I was aghast; like being bludgeoned to near death – just because I knew what was possibly going to happen.

He told me that I inferred/implicated people on my podcast who I was working with.  Implicating and inferring is completely different from name-dropping, but it was pretty comical going back to those podcasts (a year later) and cringing to everything I said.  Arsenio, you so bad.  (LOL)

I was so thrown off by the entire ordeal, so I cancelled class and went HAM…..I MEAN HAM on a podcast (I should post the podcast here, but it’s not necessary); expressing extreme discontent about the ‘snake’ who was nipping at the heels of my feet, trying to find any detail that can give him more work and get me fired.  Again, envy and jealous – two of the deadly horsemen that rides in the mind of humanity.

However, over the next two weeks, one shot himself in his own foot and relieved himself, shutting the door on a door that should’ve been shut a year before.  *forehead wiping*

Did this fix any of the relationships I had with the other teachers? Nope.  One-by-one, every relationship began failing.  The first one was because of a senseless berate of me being in a classroom that he should’ve been in….actually, make that two (teachers) of them.  So long!

Others ranged from “Arsenio is too loud and has too much fun in class,” to “Arsenio is inexperienced and gets too much work.”  You name it, you say it, I’ve heard it.

What I didn’t do was quit the podcast.  Going forward in my unfolding journey, I’ve learned how to persevere and not quit.  Sure, a bunch of foolish fools have seemingly stopped talking to me; hell, I haven’t talked with some people I walk by everyday for 2 years (LOL).

What culminated from a near firing was me inspiring thousands of people in more than 60 countries.  Can you imagine if I gave up then? Lives wouldn’t have been changed today.  Just because some people don’t accept what you say….doesn’t mean other will be standing around waiting and needing a dose of inspiration.

Podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/episode/12376064

Practice Persistence

When I first moved to Australia, I was extremely weak-minded.  I felt that the majority of people in Melbourne (it being extremely diverse with the French, Chinese & Mauritians) were boring; so I decided be boring, too.  I became someone who I wasn’t because of the people around me – and after 5 months, I was pleading to my mom to come home.

My mom said, “when you come back, what will you do? What’s the point? You saved all that money to go there and you want to give up?”

Thank you, mom.  At that given moment, I became a man.

This is one of the most necessary qualities for those who want to become high achievers. The refusal of giving up.  The longer you hang in there, the greater the chance you might have something happen in your favor.

Like I’ve told you before, the universe will test you as much as possible to see how committed you are to the goal.

Although I didn’t have a definite chief-aim in life, I still kept pushing on here in Thailand against what seemed to be non-stop racism.  It was very difficult until all that persistence paid off towards the end of 2014.

However, going forward with my job from there, I had to then make another statement and test the proving grounds because my integrity and teaching capabilities was demeaned heavily by others.  I guess you can say, “I was only suitable to teach lower level courses” compared to others.  At this time, I started to self-teach myself in every subject and kept looking at ways to improve myself.  In present day, I work with some of the biggest companies in Thailand and have social circles with executives all around Bangkok.  Do you think it was given to me? Absolutely not.  I needed to make a name for myself and it was all about my sheer determination.

I’m going to leave you with a very inspirational story in Jack Canfield’s book by Hugh Panero.

Hugh Panero, the cofounder and former CEO of XM Satellite Radio, is an example of amazing commitment and perseverance in the corporate sector.  After 2 years recruiting investors ranging from General Motors and Hughes Electronics to DIRECTV and Clear Channel Communications, Panero’s dream of becoming the world’s largest subscription radio service nearly collapsed in 2001.  Before a deadline on the night of June 6, 2001, Gary Parsons secured commitments of $225 million just minutes before the deadline.

After a failed launch because of an error by an engineer, the next launch date was two months later.  Panera rescheduled the debut September 12, 2001; but after the events of September 11th, he was forced to cancel the satellite’s launch party again.

In the end Panero’s team urged him to postpone the company’s launch for another year.  However, Panero held fast to his dream and debuted the service just two weeks later.

Today, there are more than 23 million subscribers paying every month to enjoy 72 channels of music plus 93 channels of premier sports, talk, comes, children’s and entertainment programming.

Podcast – https://www.spreaker.com/episode/9081534

Taking A Leap Can Transform Your Life

Chanthaburi, Thailand was a place that left me exasperated by the end of everyday because of the mistreatment not only at my school, but also around the entire town.  The grotesque stares from Thai people which was soul-crushing, the boss who threatened to fire me at any given time because she was power hungry, the colleague who made up stories of him being with university students to make me jealous (46 year old irishman with 3 teeth) among so many other things that culminated over the 5 month period.

There was a lady by the name of Tina in the deep south of Thailand who told me, “hey, I’ve been seeing your Facebook posts lately about not liking your job.  You should come down here! There are plenty of jobs!”  Thailand 4 years ago was just slightly acceptable to accepting African Americans as teachers versus the next-to-none nowadays.

So, one day I booked a minivan trip (3 hour ride with strangers) to Bangkok and took a flight from there to Nakhon Si Thammarat.  My friend, who I met for the first time, was at the airport to pick me up.  After getting settled in, we visited a man who apparently was the one with all the “power” in the province.  He greeted me with open arms and said, “So AJ (nickname), you need a job? Ok.”  He got on his phone and made a call to his wife who I later spoke to.

The conversation was put like this, “ok, when can you move here? October 10th? We will see you then.”

Accepted.

I had to tip-toe my way out of the school and Chanthaburi because the parents plead for me to stay there long term.

I wouldn’t have gotten paid for 60 days and my savings account was depleting.  I wanted to do traveling but I had only 1000$ USD left in my name, so I needed to hurry and get out of the school who paid me 66$ less because I was African American versus the two other caucasian teachers (from America and Ireland).

After experiencing the large increase in the new province in terms of salary, I was content, but then the racism began to burrow down on me like a 100 lb weight. When I was approaching the last months of Nakhon Si Thammarat, I hit rock bottom in courage, self-esteem, and self confidence.

I recall applying for 60 jobs one morning and got one reply from a gentleman who’s school was in a remote town near the historical Ayutthaya.  Well, I took another leap.

The school, being right in the middle of a marsh, had some of the worst energy I’ve ever experienced in my life.  By that time, I knew what was good and what wasn’t in this country; therefore, after 3 job interviews that plummeted viciously whereas I walked out of one because they didn’t call my name.  Conversely, whilst enduring all that pain, I continued to fight and ultimately got a job in Bangkok.

4 years on…my life has changed completely after the transgressions.  That leap of faith.  A lot of people would say on twitter, “why are you still here then?” Ignore senseless questions like that.  These people, just like some of the colleagues I’ve worked with in the present and past, will try demoralize you and make you believe that you’re just a speck in the world.

I’m not here for a wife, a girlfriend, or to retire….I’m here to become the best version of myself and changed the lives of thousands all over the world.

Look what has happened to me in spite of the rejections, the no’s, the people not talking to me, the racial comments, the job prospects asking if I’m black…..how was I able to change it around?

After taking all those leaps, I reached a plateau in which I was very content with my life, but still didn’t have a life purpose statement.  I was shooting blanks in life hoping to hit something, but wasn’t.

Then I picked up a book that changed my life.  I’m telling you to take that leap.  To do research.  Find out the life purpose and what you’re really after.  What legacy do you want to leave in life?

It all comes with taking the gigantic leap.