Arsenio’s ESL Podcast: International Guest Speaker: Andres of Puerto Rico

This was the most HONEST conversation I had in a decade, and it marked the first time that my friend Andre, who I’ve known for 20 years, and I went into some very dark places in terms of what we had done as children.

From the first days we met, to having multiple deaths in family and school, getting stuck on a mountain before being rescued, his big move to NY to get away from a family that was suffocating the life out of him, and confronting a father who abandoned him since he was a child.

Amazing.

International Guest Speaker Andre

Things we discussed:

  • Brief introduction given by Andre to the listeners and talked about the intrinsic meaning of ‘face the music’.
  • How he began learning English.
  • Some of the challenges that he needed to overcome.
  • The development of our friendship.
  • How we originally met.
  • Reconciliation and salvation.
  • His big move to the east coast and leaving everything behind in Las Vegas.
  • His relationship with his father.
  • Did he get the closure he wanted before his father’s passing?
  • Does the guest has any regrets?
  • Sharing their childhood experiences that shaped their outlook of life.
  • What is the guest’s advice for the listeners?
  • New York Slang.

Podcast

Thank you for listening!

Links:

  1. Facebook page: https://www.facebook.com/thearseniobuckshow/
  2. Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thearseniobuckshow/?hl=en
  3. YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCIzp4EdbJVMhhSnq_0u4ntA
  4. Podcasts: https://www.spreaker.com/user/thearseniobuckshow, https://open.spotify.com/show/7hdzplWx6xB8mhwDJYiP6f, https://www.buzzsprout.com/165390
  5. Website: https://thearseniobuckshow.com/
  6. Twitter: https://twitter.com/arseniobuckshow?lang=en

Speed of Trust: Season 4 – Episode 47 – The Impact on Trust Accounts

When I teach my students a test preparation course called IELTS, which I’ve mentioned a many of times, I make sure I deliver on my results. When they tell me, “I need 5.5,” I tell them, “you’ll get a 6.0.”

Why?

Because I deliver on the promise. Not only that, but because if they aim for that score, they might get .5 short and not get the required score to get into their institution of choice.

I know the test from the back of my mind and I know all the techniques needed to past the test. I’m more than capable and absolutely have an insurmountable amount of capabilities. However, other teachers don’t focus on the outcome. They don’t “clarify” in the beginning, therefore it sets the students up for a catastrophic failure.

I was recently speaking on my podcast about an institution which I’ve lost all credibility for. This place in Bangkok is super overpriced and they just don’t deliver the results. I recommended a student to pay an extortionate amount because I had full trust in them, and not only did they destroy that trust, but my student ended up scoring far less.

In the future, I will never recommend that language center. Instead, I’m the language center I’ll recommend.

FedEx Built That Trust

One morning in 2013 (before moving here to Thailand), I was checking information on my package. It had been about 4 days and there was no delivery. I went on the internet and saw that the package was “left at the door.” Just a year before, Australia Post left my package at the door, underneath a rug (like no one would see it), and I was completely irate about it.

I thought the same happened during this debacle, so I contacted them, complained, yelled at innocent people outside, and went on a tangent for about 15 minutes.

Later, my sister calmly walked down the steps without saying a word, went to the closet near the bathroom, took out the package and handed it to me.

Boy, did I feel dumb.

30 minutes later I got a doorknock — and guess who it was — FedEx!

“I gave you that package.” he said without any introduction.”

I plead for forgiveness, we laughed it off, but it was the unbelievable service they provided. He drove down to talk to me about where my package was…..and that right there established my full faith in FedEx.

Wheel of Life: March 2019 Edition – HERE IT COMES!

Boy, I woke up from a nap in the afternoon and realized that I had forgotten my wheel of life podcast! HEARTBREAKING!

Rest assured, I’ve delivered it and it’s time to kick things off!

So for those of you tuning in for the first time, you’re probably asking yourselves, “what is the wheel of life podcast?”

Perfect question.

Rate yourself on a scale 1-10 in the following categories.

  • Personal Development
  • Physical Environment
  • Wealth
  • Health
  • Career
  • Romantic Relationships
  • Family and Friends
  • Fun & Hobbies

Personal Development – 9

Yes, I have ‘Rich Dad Poor Dad’ in my ear, along with reading books and just injecting myself with so much information that can be extremely vital. However, there’s room for improvement.

For instance, my morning routine, which is always interrupted by my habit of picking up my phone, isn’t the best. I don’t do meditation as often and I don’t listen to affirmations in the morning. However, look at my self-awareness!

Physical Environment – 10

Quiet, cozy, conveniently located condominium and jobs that I enjoy going to. I don’t wake up in the morning saying, “ahhh I have this student or this job today.” That’s not in my vocabulary. I’m beyond content with what’s happening.

Romantic Relationships – X

You already know what this is. It’s been happening forever, but maybe because I’m so focused on achieving greatness in my personal life (with my career)

Circle of Friends (Family & Friends) – 8

I haven’t made that many contacts this month. I tried reaching out and I’ve also heard some amazingly inspiring stories, but it’s still not good enough. I have a ridiculously solid core around me, but then I’m let down because people can’t keep their agreements. So, I shoo them away and put them on the outside so that if they do leave again or do something that causes a disruption, I will have shrugged my shoulder and say “good riddance.”

Fun & Hobbies – 7

Yes, Malaysia, which was probably the most disappointing trip I’ve had since going to Laos (and for the last time) last year, did happen…but it’s nothing to brag about.

I filled in my Monday schedule again with more work after promising myself that Monday would be a core/meet friends day. I’m still cancelling people because I would much rather sleep than develop a relationship. See, lots of inner voices are still running rampant and I’m trying to control them.

Career – 10

Patreon to monetize my English language courses, UDEMY for the pronunciation course, business writing development for a client that’s going to score me my biggest ever salary, and so many other things. Yes, I haven’t been connecting and I’ve pressed “stop” on all interviewees (especially on my personal development podcast), but I’m more focused on the bigger picture now.

More in the podcast down below!

Interviewee #33 – Lenita Abouchabake on Youth Leadership

Another amazing connection that made way into my inbox. We got on a call, same day, and talked for almost an hour. This amazing Australia has come on to share some unbelievable thoughts. I will bring her on BeLive.tv (The Arsenio Buck Show) and Motivational Mentors, so please be sure to follow those Facebook pages, too! Here’s what we chatted about.

Another amazing connection that made way into my inbox. We got on a call, same day, and talked for almost an hour. This amazing Australia has come on to share some unbelievable thoughts. I will bring her on BeLive.tv (The Arsenio Buck Show) and Motivational Mentors, so please be sure to follow those Facebook pages, too! Here’s what we chatted about.

Lenita’s passion for health and young people always empowered her into learning ways to educate youth on how to become healthy, confident and resilient. This passion led her to becoming a Physical Education Teacher, to raise awareness on the importance of student wellbeing.

Wanting to expand her classroom, she left her teaching role to become a Youth Speaker and Teen Coach. She speaks in high schools to deliver resilient presentations and provides students with practical ways to help them overcome various hardships in their life.

With the success of her youth speaking business, Lenita supports leaders and experts in Personal Development and Financial Literacy, in becoming Youth Speakers to share their story and expertise with the youth around the world – essentially filling the gaps in the education system.

Get in touch with Lenita Abouchabake on Youth Leadership

Links:

Things we discussed:

  • Introduction given by Lenita Abouchabake to the listeners and the problem with traditional of education system and limited soft skills, building abundance and financial literacy in the Western world.
  • What are taught in Australian system?
  • What are the differences between non self-aware and self-aware people.
  • What are the big issues and the commonalities that are happening amongst youth?
  • What is the paradox of detention in schools?
  • Rejection & Resentment
  • The importance of individuals’ purpose.
  • Roadblocks and overcoming them.
  • How to create opportunities for yourself?
  • How to invest in yourself and make an impact.

Thank you for listening!

Thank you so much for joining me on this podcast. Please do write down some feedback and comments. Please do share this podcast to your social media.

Links:

  1. Facebook page: https://www.facebook.com/thearseniobuckshow/
  2. Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thearseniobuckshow/?hl=en
  3. YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCIzp4EdbJVMhhSnq_0u4ntA
  4. Podcasts: https://www.spreaker.com/user/thearseniobuckshow, https://open.spotify.com/show/7hdzplWx6xB8mhwDJYiP6f, https://www.buzzsprout.com/165390
  5. Website: https://thearseniobuckshow.com/
  6. Twitter: https://twitter.com/arseniobuckshow?lang=en

Arsenio’s ESL Podcast: International Guest Speaker – Juliette of Estonia – The Queen of Visibility

What a wonderful podcast this was with a brilliant entrepreneur, coach, author and many other things. Juliette, born and raised in Estonia, brought the house down with some amazing personal development bits (needed for my English learners, too). This was my goal all along to bring amazing people around to share some serious knowledge with everyone…..to a point — that they won’t even realize they’re studying English — but more learning it. I hope you guys enjoy this one! Link down below!

Get in touch with Juliette Stapleton, a Queen of Visibility

Links:

Things we discussed:

The power of visibility through social media.

How she started her business.

The power of referral marketing and the power of determination.

The power of facing death and how to enjoy your life.

The power of gratitude.

Chaos and motivation. How did the guest manage to get through all the hardships and negativity?

The “aha” moment.

The guest’s to-do list.

When did she move to Thailand.

The removal of negative people.

The power of being an introvert by leveraging the power of internet and English learning.

The big three things.

Why the guest is leaving Ireland and moving back to her native Estonia. How she is going to manage the reverse culture shock.

How to travel to Estonia?

 

 

Thank you for listening!

 

Links:

  1. Facebook page: https://www.facebook.com/thearseniobuckshow/
  2. Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thearseniobuckshow/?hl=en
  3. YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCIzp4EdbJVMhhSnq_0u4ntA
  4. Podcasts: https://www.spreaker.com/user/thearseniobuckshow, https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/the-arsenio-buck-show/id1181794790?mt=2, https://open.spotify.com/show/0x39CEN5tHvfRtfZaAMTgQ?si=8cpdu1rTTjKHogufXh91Cw
  5. Website: https://thearseniobuckshow.com/
  6. Twitter: https://twitter.com/arseniobuckshow?lang=en

Stephen Covey’s Speed of Trust: Season 4 – Episode 27 – What’s Your Track Record? Results Matter!

What’s your track record?

Honestly, you have to ask yourself what your track record is. What are you known for?

Just this morning, I had a wonderful Filipino author (friend) of mine tag me in a post in regards to another entrepreneur. He said people were trying to slander his name. Tough times…as most of us go through, but you don’t want to be known for having a notorious track record.

It’s like the dental office that’s known for not giving good dental work; the McDonalds in North Bangkok that’s known for employees sitting on their phones while customers’ food stacked up behind them.

Results matter! They matter to your credibility. They matter to your ability to establish and maintain trust with others.

In my podcast, I go into further detail, but this is super important.

Let me give you another example (not in the podcast). There was a guy named Peter. Peter is a over-50 teacher in Thailand (and we know they’re extremely notorious). My guess is he’s been battling depression by the way he walks. A defeated soul walking through the double doors everyday. Well, he had a track record for being a very bad teacher when it came to teaching a specific test preparation course called IELTS.

Furthermore, Ian, who’s an over 70 teacher, was known for watching ridiculous videos on YouTube with his students and not teaching them. The manager of language center would then make a decision and not give him “serious” classes because he really didn’t care about teaching anymore.

Other teachers were known for a variety of things….thus why it’s difficult for people to establish trust in them.

Without the results, you simply don’t have that same kind of clout.

Unfortunately in Thailand, with or without the results, I’m still incapable, thus why I turned to teaching off my website instead. Not only that, but my track record of getting students the desired scores are way above anyone else. You need to show me that you’re capable of getting the job done.

On the other hand, if you are getting results but you’re violating one of the three cores — say you get the numbers in a way that violates integrity, or creates a “lose” for others — your production will not be sustainable, nor will the fruit be good (metaphorical tree.)

Paul, a very good IELTS teacher, was a parasite to the language center. He would speak ill of the entire country and everything he touched turned to shit — figuratively (but often times I thought literally). These people get the results, but at the mercy of having them in particular companies….they have to be disposed of as quickly as possible because with them — your tree with dozens of apples can completely rot.

Now over to you….

  • What kind of results are you currently producing? Do those results increase or diminish your personal credibility?
  • If you were considering hiring someone, to what extent would that person’s track record and current performance influence my decision?
  • How good is my own track record?

Podcast

Family & Friends: Goals for 2019!

Some things can’t be changed.  I completely understand.  Last year I saw three significant departures, and going back to my blog, I’m now looking back on my previous self — terrified.

I literally have my best friend in New York and a good friend in Australia.  The others come and go as they will…more labeled as acquaintances.  2017 was a rough year.  There were days of emotional turmoil and even a three-day-period when I fell under a trance of melancholy.  Not good.  I pushed for dead-end relationships and that’s what needs to be cleaned up going into the latter stages of the year.  Sure, I met two friends (before one vanished) and I still have one that’s up and running.  In terms of meeting people around Bangkok, I think it will happen in due time, but I’m preparing for that massive change now.
Family
Yikes! What a disaster of a category this is.  Haha! A brother who has always hated me (thank you), two sisters who don’t speak to me (typical), a mother who has never tried calling me in the last five years of living here in Thailand (why so serious?), and an entire family that’s completely jealous of what I’m doing with my life.  However, they can do the same thing.

January 6th, 2018

As you can see in the link, WOW! That’s some pretty scary language coming from a now mentor/coach.  Just amazing how I was able to turn it around entirely.

What did I do? Well, from my friend Waii (who left in May, came back and left again for a long time), to another girl named Zern (was a relationship then dropped it), and lastly — my friend Alissa (who completely disappeared to the middle of this year).  Looking at what had happened before, I absolutely didn’t want to make the same mistake again this year. So, did I try adding in any friends? NOPE! Only close circle people.

In April, I lost a friend named Nazira, who lives in Bishkek.  I lost another one from Indonesia and one late last year.  I took out everything, and in my mind, I pretty much accepted that friends will absolutely come and go.  I’m my biggest and bestest friend, and that’s the only person I can rely on.

However, who I have around me NOW is utterly amazing.  Great people from head-to-toe.  Life coaches, relationship coaches, mentors, graphic designers, new content writer……this year I did repeat the bullshit I had done in the past (which is just letting people into my close circle).  People who are outside my circle will stay outside my circle.  The great people who are in my circle will never depart because they’ve become my oxygen and they’re not selfish.  The people who I had let inside my circle (closed circle) last year were incredibly selfish.  They didn’t care about the relationship….only their person needs.

One more example would be a friend from Japan.  Yeah, she came into my life as a language exchange buddy who I developed a REMARKABLE companionship with.  After that, she had become distance, which is what women normally do, and then that last message came: “Arsenio, I can’t message you anymore. I’m going to America tomorrow to meet my boyfriend.

“You can’t talk to me anymore but you still have a husband and you’re going to meet a boyfriend in another country?

Arsenio

Yeah, ridiculous. She left March this year, and this happens a lot with my Japanese friends (not holding an entire country accountable for some individual actions, but it’s the last time I’ll ever let someone in my closed circle).

Over to you.

  1. Who do you have in your circle who’s taking, rather than giving?
  2. What new companions and professionals can you add to your closed circle and drop into the outer circle?
  3. Are you able to recognize those who will invest in you?
  4. Is your family too toxic to overcome that you want to distance yourself? If so, how can you start trimming the time that you’re with them?
  5. Are you investing too much into your family that’s not being reinvested in you?
  6. Make a list of the people who are giving and a list of people who are taking.

Listen to “Family & Friends: Goals for 2019!” on Spreaker.

Interviewee #025 – Luke Burrows, Joint-Mentorship with Motivational Mentors is Back!

Welcome back to another podcast interviewee, and in this episode I’m bringing back my partner in crime.  Luke Burrows, the Co-Host of Motivation Mentors, is here to talk about the birth of the Grow2Gether Academy and the huge launch we have coming up in January. Tune in!

Luke Burrows is the founder of Grow2Gether a online personal growth community for millennials to help them stand, rise and grow together. Luke works with the young people of today to help them change the way they think to unlock their potential through coaching and mentoring”

Luke Burrows
Mindset Coach, Entrepreneur and Founder of Grow2Gether
P: 077855 63170
E: info@lukeburrows.com    W: https://www.lukeburrows.com

 

Show Notes

Things that were discussed. 

Links:

Things we discussed:

  • Grow2Gether Academy and why Luke has started it. 
  • The targets for the academy and the demographics.
  • What types of courses will be available on the Grow2Gether Academy. 
  • Beginners of personal development and what their recommendations would be. 
  • What additional perks are there in the academy.
  • Are the expectations high?
  • Will there be an app for Grow2GatherAcademy for iOS and Android?
  • More features which will become readily available on the Grow2Gather Academy.

Listen to “Interviewee #025 – Luke Burrows with The Grow2Gether Academy” on Spreaker.

Thank you for listening!

Links:

  1. Facebook page: https://www.facebook.com/thearseniobuckshow/
  2. Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thearseniobuckshow/?hl=en
  3. YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCIzp4EdbJVMhhSnq_0u4ntA
  4. Podcasts: https://www.spreaker.com/user/thearseniobuckshow, https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/the-arsenio-buck-show/id1181794790?mt=2, https://open.spotify.com/show/0x39CEN5tHvfRtfZaAMTgQ?si=8cpdu1rTTjKHogufXh91Cw
  5. Website: https://thearseniobuckshow.com/
  6. Twitter: https://twitter.com/arseniobuckshow?lang=en

Stephen Covey’s Speed of Trust: Season 4 – Episode 6 – The Four Cores

Guys welcome back to another Stephen Covey blog/podcast, and today is a follow up from what we’ve already done with the questionnaire (last week). 

So, each part in the questionnaire corresponds to one of the “4 Cores of Credibility.”  These are the foundational elements that make you believable, both ot yourself and to others. 

So, when it comes to integrity, it basically means honesty.  It’s walking your talk.  Do you live up to your values and beliefs? Or do you do opposite of what you say. 

Core 2: Intent

The second core deals with issues of intent.  This has to do with our motives, our agendas, and our resulting behavior.  Trust grows when our motives are straightforward and based on mutual benefit — in other words, when we genuinely care not only for ourselves, but also for the people we interact with, lead, or serve.  When we suspect a hidden agenda from someone or we don’t believe they are acting in our best interests, we are suspicious about everything they say and do. 

Both integrity and intent are matters of character.

Stephen Covey’s Speed of Trust

This happens a lot in my life because I have a tendency of always saying to myself, “is this real?”  Came across a lady on the street last night and she was super friendly.  It didn’t make any sense, and I truly believed that she had a hidden agenda. She was trying to exploit me somehow, someway, and I was right. 

Core 3: Capabilities

The third core deals with issues of capabilities.  These are the abilities that have inspire confidence — our talens, attitudes, skills, knowledge, and style.  They are the means we use to produce results.  A family doctor might have integrity and his motives might be good, but unless he’s trained and skilled to perform the task at hand (brain surgery, for example) he’ll be lacking in credibility in that area.  Capabilities also deal with our ability to establish, grow, extend, and restore trust. 

Stephen Covey’s Speed of Trust

Core 4: Results

The fourth core deals with issues around results.  This refers to our track record, our performance, our getting the right things done.  If we don’t accomplish what we are expected to do, it diminishes our credibility.  On the other hand, when we achieve the results we promised, we establish a positive reputation of performing, of being a produce, and our reputation precedes us. 

Stephen Covey’s Speed of Trust

And these are the cores.  Remember, everyone, each area is of equal importance.  Example, someone who has great integrity, good intent and a great track record my lack capabilities.  Another person who has great integrity, capable and produces excellent results may have selfishness and doesn’t care about you.  

In any case, you won’t fully trust that person in any situation. So, in order to visualize the importance of all cores is by through the metaphor of a tree.  Integrity is the root of the tree which everything else grows.  Intent becomes more visible after you establish the character, which is just below the soil.  It’s essentially the big trunk the pokes its head out.  The capabilities are the branches and the capacities that enable us to produce.  Results are the fruits.  

So, with the being said, we’re going to have to start going through the cores

Podcast

Stephen Covey’s Speed of Trust: Season 4 – Episode 4 – The Four Cores of Credibility

The first part of this particular chapter is FIRE!

Imagine that you are in a court of law.  You’ve been called as an expert witness, and the lawyer for the prosecution is attempting to convince the jury that you are a credible witness.  What will he try to prove?

First, that you are a person of integrity — that you are honest and congruent, that you have a reputation for being truthful, and that you would not lie.

Second, that you have good intent — that you’re not trying to deceive or protect anyone, that you don’t have any hidden motives or agenda that would color your testimony.

Third, that your credentials are excellent.

Fourth, that you have a good track record, that you have demonstrated your capabilities effectively in other situations in the past.

It’s the truth, right? You have to be able to hold your ground and show that you are credibly and not a “flake,” like a lot of people are.

Situation 1

One of my associates, who I completely adore, normally disappears 48-hours – 120 hours at a time.  It’s pretty ridiculous, right? How can one do business with someone who’s notorious for going on hiatuses? Let’s put it into context.

When I had a podcast episode ready to go at 9am one morning with a yoga/holistic instructor from America and I didn’t show up, did she want to come back on? No.  I lost all credibility and wasted her time — time that she could’ve used elsewhere for someone else.  Point taken.

A podcast episode was suppose to be recorded today with my partner in crime (a trust bond that was developing but had fallen recently due to disapprances) and then…after 24 hours, not a message about continuing on with it or anything. Just…GONE!  So, because I just met this person, I don’t give second chances.  If I do and the person responses, I double up on what they should’ve done.  Meaning I simply don’t respond to them for the amount of time they never responded to me.

Jack Canfield, who I adore like crazy, gives them two opportunities.  He went to the gardener and said, “you’re going to assume all responsibility.  If there’s something wrong with the garden, I’ll tell you. That’s your only warning.  If I see something wrong again, I’ll find someone else.”

Pretty good, ey? He had given them all responsibility, therefore, that person knew what their role was, not the topsy-turvy roles that most people give others that contradict what they’re supposed to do.

Being Credible — To Yourself & Others

Guys, this starts with two questions: 1) Do I trust myself? Am I someone others can trust?

Let’s talk about a very simple situation.  People who set alarms and always hit snooze? Are you the guilty one? Are you someone who wakes up in the morning, reaches over and turns it off? After that, you would justify why you were doing it and making up excuses? After some time, you’re going to start asking yourself these questions.

  • Why am I setting my alarm so early?
  • Why am I even doing this?
  • What’s wrong with me?

That repeated behavior weakens your self-confidence.  When you set the alarm, you would automatically believe that you’re not getting up, right?

It’s like me.  When I told my friend that I would meet them ad cancel a day or just hours before, you lose all credibility.  Australians are absolutely notorious for this (what I’ve experienced living there in a year).  Just a half hour before meeting up, they cancel.  That relationship is doomed because if someone had already gone to the meet up place to meet them and they cancel? Unacceptable.

What can you do to get through the commitment? That’s it, getting through the commitment!  If you set that alarm to do whatever task it is, do it.  You owe it to yourself.  You need that integrity back, if not, the trust in your ability to work for your commitments will never come back.

If you don’t do this, not only does it hack away at our self-confidence, but we fail to project that strength of character that inspires trust.

Podcast