How To Be More Interesting (Men & Women)

When I came back from Australia, I had NOTHING in common with anyone in Las Vegas. Yes, that mass of desert with a population shy of two million – all of whom never travel abroad.  I remember I was at a bar and this girl ranted, “America is the greatest country in the world!”  After hearing such lunacy, especially after living in gorgeous Melbourne and Sydney, Australia, I was appalled by that comment.  Both her and I not only had ZERO things in common, but someone else named Steven agreed with her, too.  Oh, who’s Steven? My blood brother.

And with that being said, some of the most awkward conversations came when I spoke with Las Vegans because they seriously believe the world revolves around America.  Everyone seemed uninteresting to me because in American society, you get seven days paid vacation every year.  OUCH! No wonder why they don’t know where Denmark is! Not taking shots at Americans, but some of them have mindsets such as what I see here in Thailand.

Anyways, what’s the first thing you can do to become a more interesting character?

TRAVEL!

I’m not saying save 3k$ a travel to Japan for a week.  No, no, and no.  You have the Central Americas and literally South America in your neck of the woods.  I’m not saying go transpacific or transatlantic.  Get your feet wet by checking out what’s next door before going to the other side of town.  This will increase your ability to create conversations with strangers, let alone you’ll be able to add things to conversations, too.

Expand Your Knowledge 

The more you know, the more attractive you become.  No, I’m not talking about the ‘circle of concern’ such as monotonous politics and controversial topics such as religion and Trump; I’m talking about what are you reading.  What are you doing with your life and more importantly…what are you feeding your mind? Are you working at your local grocer or are you an entrepreneur in and Asian country, teaching while managing your own website, podcast, and writing a book? See, what looks sexier?

Improving Your Personality

You are who your five closest friends are.  If you’re not happy about who you are or what you represent, it’s time to do something about your circle.  How can you go about improving your personality? Well, the world is your oyster.  Napoleon Hill said you knew a man who picked out different qualities and attributes from Abraham Lincoln and four other prominent figures at the dusk of the 1800’s.  He would go onto visualize being that person.  And you know what? It happened.  Who’s personality do you admire the most? Start figuring out what they do with their lives in terms of daily routines and adopt a system that’s suitable for you!

More on my podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/episode/12139019

What’s That One Habit You Can Do In The Morning? Time To Create It!

It’s that one thing that will help you in the morning and fuel that burning desire (or lack thereof).  Creating a routine in the morning is difficult, but after trying a variety of things in 2016, I have a morning routine as follows.

  • Initial wake-up into meditation.
  • After meditation, count the things that I’m grateful for in my professional and social life.
  • Prime in the shower which consists of burning hot water – to freezing cold.
  • Vitamins then off to doing my podcast + blog.
  • Head to the gym, shower at the gym, then I’m ready for work by 10am.

On the days that I’m off, I fall completely out of my routine (bad habit that I’m still trying to destroy) if I don’t write anything on my to-do list.

So, in addition to what I’ve said above, here’s a video (Tony Robbins – I’m Not Your Guru) that has an excellent morning routine that a lot of people can adopt.  Recounting the three things you’re most grateful for, going back to your earliest childhood memory, and feeling everything about those moments of pure joy.  It starts at 1:43:00 and finishes at about 1:49:00-1:50.  You need to view this video from a desktop/notebook.

Bomb Those Distractions

On one of the most important days of my professional life, I woke up at 3am and couldn’t go back to sleep because I glanced at my phone.  This is one of the problems I have with leaving my phone inside my bedroom.  GET IT OUT!

Also, you should NOT tune into the news for the first 1 hour of the day because I can tell you right now that it will leave a very lasting impression on you compared to looking at it later in the morning.  You will see yourself bitching much faster and sending that bitchy information to other people who bitch so you can bitch together and have a bitch breakfast and bitch morning.  Get the drift?

Social Networking – I’m Not talking about FB, Twitter and Co

I never….EVER….EVER….EVER have a problem with the main social networking sites out there controlling my habits.  I will admit one malicious habit is social chat apps, which in actuality drops my defences because the amount of racist that’s dished out at me.  Yet, I still get on them? Foolish.

However, I bombed them all AGAIN just two days ago and the productivity not only went up 200%, but I also regained control of my happiness.  I love to ask myself “what’s 80% of my unhappiness right now?”  There’s one particular individual who I will never talk to again for as long as I live, and there are the social chatting apps such as horrendous Tinder, Skout, Badoo, etc.  In my personal opinion, I think this is probably the worst of them all because it’s not only time-consuming, but the headaches you get involved with where again….you go out and bitch about these men seeking women as objects to your friends and that 1 hour later you’re talking about why there aren’t any good men in the world.  STEER CLEAR!

Those are my distractors.  I’ve recently taken them out….and now I have control.

What are yours?

Podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/episode/11853811

 

Jack Canfield – Chunk It Down

The secret of getting ahead is getting started.  The secret of getting started is breaking your complex, overwhelming tasks into small, manageable tasks, and then starting on the first one. – Mark Twain

Sometimes our biggest life goals seem so overwhelming.  We rarely see them as a series of small, achievable tasks.  However, if we can break down larger goals into achievable tasks and accomplish them one at a time…that’s how the macro win is achieved.

One of the first and most important ways to begin chunking it down is by consulting people who are already where you want to be and ask them about the steps they had to take.  With their area of expertise, it will allow you to maneuver around the storms and avoid the traps.

Another way is by buying some type of book, manual, or even looking at instructional videos on YouTube that outline the process, like monetizing your own YouTube content.  I learned how to do that within 10 minutes.

A good way is to start from he end and look backwards.  Close your eyes and imagine having already achieved the goal…then just look back and see what you had to do to get where you now are.

Mind Mapping

This is definitely the most powerful process for creating that to-do list that outlines your goal.  It helps you figure out all the information you’ll need to gather, who you will need to talk to, what small steps you’ll need to take, how much money you’ll need to earn or raise, which deadlines you’ll need to meet, and so on.

Just imagine the mind map this way….massive center circle in the middle of the page – in this case, Podcast.

The outer circles would be divided into major categories and tasks I would’ve need to accomplish to achieve the greater goal.  What’s the name of my podcast? Topics? Audience? Necessary equipment? Schedule? Money?

The spokes, which are the lines that you would draw on the side of the outer circles to indicate extra information, would be labeled.

Here’s my podcast both on spreaker and youtube so my tribe can listen in to what I’m saying!

Podcast – https://www.spreaker.com/episode/8496585

Podcast on YouTube – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gbmHi1iCMGo

 

 

 

 

 

Tim Ferris: 3 Ways (plus a podcast of the other 5) To Dealing With Haters

I was called into an office one afternoon and was told that I had been inferring & implicating other individuals in my podcast (apparently inflammatory comments about ones’ intentions within Thailand) and I was told to stop doing my podcast and to delete all of my episodes.

Yeah.  Right.

We’ve all dealt with criticism in the work place, at home, on the streets, and even in my neighborhood back in Las Vegas which everyone was predominantly African American.  Yes, I’m African American, and other African Americans hated me because I had a job.  They said I was an ‘uncle tom.’

With a couple examples above, I came across a section in Tim Ferris’ book that I just HAD TO COVER!

Some simple steps of dealing with the so-called “haters” who show love in a very precarious way.

#1 – It doesn’t matter how many people don’t get it, but how many do get it.

There was an instance I had that I became discouraged because I got about 6 podcast plays a day.  One of my loyal listeners, a girl from Denpensar in Bali, asked me….”why haven’t you made any podcasts lately?” I said, “well, no one is listening.”

She replied angrily saying, “ummm, regardless of how many plays you do or don’t have, what about your listeners who are waiting for your voice in what could be a time of crisis in their lives?”

Wow.  I never realized that.

“These people become your strongest marketing force, and the rest takes care of itself. The millions or billions who don’t get it don’t matter. Focus on the few who do.” – Tim Ferris

Don’t become discouraged because of what you’re doing isn’t a top hit; instead, focus on those loyal people who are tuned into you instead.

#2 – 10% of people will find a way to take anything personally. Expect it and treat it as math.

You mentally have to prepare yourself.  For every 1000 followers, 100 of them will be “assholes” as Tim Ferris said.  Treat it as math.  On top of that, know that 1% will be absolutely off their head and demean you anyways they can.

A good story of this is a YouTube (once well known) Vince G.  This was a sad story of someone who joined forces with another sensation, and him ultimately parting ways with this particular individual.  What ensued was him making a channel and every time he posted a video, not only did he get a 5:1 dislike to like ratio, but inflammatory comments such as, “I hope you die.”

This lead him to dropping off the face of the planet for months and luckily he did some soul searching and joined forces as an editor with someone else.

A more recent story is Tim Ferris himself wrote an article in terms of cutting weight before a UFC weigh in or whatever, and every last comment on his page was, “I respected you, but not after this.”  Some of the “apparent” loyal followers had fallen off due to something that considered the norm in prized fighting.  These types of things can steer ultra-successful people away from their goals because people not liking a simple article.

This is that group of people.

#3 When it doubt – starve it with oxygen. 

Here are three ways to deal with online criticism….

  • Starve it of oxygen (ignore it)—90%
  • Pour gasoline on it (promote it)—8%
  • Engage with trolls after too much wine (and really regret it)—2%

 

 

About three years ago, there was a racist comment (as most times) on a sports forum and I responded to this particular troll in a way I shouldn’t have.  My profile was out there to the world whereas I received 15 messages from people spewing hateful rhetoric to my “other” inbox and me getting banned for 16 hours from Facebook.  However, the origin (original poster’s) comment had no defamation or hate speech, according to Facebook.

There was a particular individual who wasn’t happy.  A father (apparently) of two somewhere Florida who literally stalked me for the ensuing 18 months, trying to figure out where I work and emailed a variety of people with a snapshot of what I said.

This is called pouring gasoline on something in the wrongest of ways.  Luckily, this particular individual finally stopped and vanished, but the lesson was learnt – stay the “hell” away from idle gossiping pages, especially sports forums where my friend calls it “troll city.” HA!

With that being said, people, there’s five other steps and this blog post is already too long (oops), so if you guys want to hear me speak about this in its entirety, my podcast down below is just shy of 30 minutes but goes into more detail of the others.  So, if you guys are intrigued, tune in!  If not, stay tuned for my 2am (Bangkok, Thailand time) blog post on what else?! NUTRITION! It’s been too long!

Podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/episode/11038919

 

 

Lisa Nichols – The Law of Attraction

In Lisa Nichols ‘Abundance Now’ book, she states that when the secret took off in 2006, it was later translated into 50 languages and sold over 20 million copies worldwide.

Lots of people, especially religious folks, think other wise about the movie “the secret” in terms of it being real or not.  However, regardless if you believe it’s true or not, we’re all vibrational beings.

Have you ever thought about that specific person then ended up getting a call from them? How about waking up in the middle of the night with a bad feeling about someone, it ultimately leading to a phone call whereas something happened to that person.

Napoleon Hill talks so much about it in his book that was written the first time 89 years ago (The Law of Success).  We attract what we think about most.

“The Law of Attraction says: What you think about, talk about, believe strongly about, and feel intensely about, you will bring about.  Your life is a physical manifestation of your thoughts and your energy. You shape your life experience in your mind first by what you think, then in your mouth by what you say, and finally in your actions by what you follow through on. Your life experience doesn’t just pop up. It takes shape in your mind first.” – Lisa Nichols

Take a long read or look at your life, everything that is happening presently is because your past thoughts, words, and actions.

These past four days have been very tumultuous for me.  From a girl spouting at me “ewwww black men are dirty,” to a failed wire transfer from an inexperienced teller at the bank, to a famous restaurant taking 30 minutes + to serve my food which they still didn’t even do.  All that came about because of me conversing with people who aren’t part of the OQP (only quality people) club, me being anxious about not getting my money into my American account, and also knowing that this particular restaurant has appalling service.

Once you take 100% responsibility for it all, it’s life transforming.

Podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/episode/10894608

Combatting Procrastination

We all face procrastination.  It’s an ever present ever green issue for a reason.

I, myself, have things that I always put off: from writing my book, to doing the simplest things.

The first thing I have to say is look at goals from a micro and macro level.  Once you do, you’re going to be able to break down goals into the smallest actions conceivable.

Example, writing 2000 words in one day just seems like such a daunting task that will scare the hell out of you, ultimately having you just put it off until the next day, week, month.

Instead, you want to just write 1-2 bad pages.  Take away the number (2000) and just write a couple of bad pages of your book first.  What that does is create momentum, and a lot of us know when we’re in the zone, we continue going.

Next, if you have 10 things on your to-do list, which ONE THING can you do that will make the rest easier or irrelevant?

Example, Tim Ferris talked about flossing your teeth.  You want to make it as easy and automatic as possible.  Do less than what you’re capable of doing….so how about saying, “I’m only going to floss three teeth.”  Yeah, sounds a bit odd, but this applies to a lot more than just flossing.

How about incentives and consequences? Having an accountability partner?

Example, get into a challenge whereas there’s a pot of gold at work, and whoever doesn’t work out for an “x” amount of minutes, they have to donate $1 to the pot.  Raise the stakes, make it a few dollars.  Why? Because people hate losing money, right? When money is at stake, you will do whatever it takes to get the task done.

Example, I try achieving 13,000 steps a day.  The most difficult part about this is of course having a watch and tracking it makes it easy, but if I’m sitting at 9,000 steps and I’m going home in the evening, that means I have to somehow get 4k steps before hitting my night routine, which is the ultimate slayer.  Can you imagine after teaching all day having to come home and walk 1-2km just to achieve the mark? Hold yourself accountable.

If not, get someone who will.

More in my podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/episode/9597615

Jack Canfield – Build A Powerful Support Team & Delegate To Them

The ascent of Everest was not the work of one day, nor even of those few unforgettable weeks in which we climbed….it is, in fact, a tale of sustained and tenacious endeavour by many, over a long period of time.  Sir John Hunt *Scaled Mount Everest in 1953*

Listen, in order to become a high achiever, you’re going to need a powerful supporting cast.  That group of staff members, consultants, vendors, and helpers who do the bulk of the work while he or she is available to create new opportunities.

Just recently I had one of my students create and resize some photos for me on photo shop because I’m not that technically savvy.  Yes, I could’ve learned myself, but if it’s easy to delegate tasks for very cheap, why not?

The Total Focus Process

There’s an excellent process in Jack Canfield’s ‘The Success Principles Book” which helps provide you with clarity in terms of how you should be spending your time, and what you should be delegating to others.

  1. Start by listing those activities that occupy your time. They could be business-related, personal, volunteer work, even things like filing and photocopying.
  2. Next, choose from the list the 1-3 that you’re very good at and that needs your special unique talents that very few people have.  These activities that you’re very god at and that generate the most income are the ones you want to spend the most time on.
  3. Finally, create a plan for delegating everything else to other people.

Another great example is since I’m a teacher, I have a lot of clothes.  I’m not going to spend 3-4 hours one evening washing 9 suits, 20 shirts and pants, etc when I can easily delegate that to the lady down the road for 2-5$ every two weeks.

The Need For Personal Advisors

Too many business owners don’t even have an accountant.  They run their entire business program; however, there aren’t any experts at hand checking the numbers.

For instance, I had a student who became an accountant at a prestigious firm and saw that employees were stealing hundreds of thousands of baths over the course of 5-10 years.  When you run a business, you need to also have people who can keep close tabs on numbers because once assets start disappearing, you have to be 100% responsible and take on the task yourself.  Or, you can pay and have one accountant do the bulk of that dirty work.

Once You’ve Chosen Your Team Members, Trust Them

A great story is one by Raymond Aaron.  He was selling his home to move into an apartment, so he delegated an entire project to his assistant. He told her to find a specific flat. “Find it, negotiate the lease, and bring me the contract to sign,” he said. “Then hire a moving van, get a check from my office to pay the movers, pack up the fragile items, supervise the movers, and drive behind them to my new home.” He even had her hire an advance cleaning crew and arrange a handful of other things.

Where did he meet her? On vacation!

What could a virtual assistant or virtual freelancer do for you? Write up speeches? Reports? Create a radio commercial? Develop a YouTube video?

Podcast – https://www.spreaker.com/episode/9211557