An Emotional Bank Account is a metaphor that describes the amount of trust that’s been built up in a relationship. It’s the feeling of safeness you have with another human being. – Stephen Covey
If and when an angry person starts in to vilify and abuse you, justly or unjustly, it’s your reaction and the retaliation in a like manner where you will either be drawn down to that person’s mental level, or rise above it. If you do fall down to their level, that means that person is dominating you.
On the other hand, if you just refuse to become angry and have that self-composure needed to keep you calm, you will take the other person by surprise. Retaliating with a weapon that the other person is unfamiliar with will catch them off guard and easily dominate them.
Look at the majority of salespeople around the planet. When an angry customer comes in hailing and flailing expletives and adjectives of all kinds, are they going to retaliate in the same manner? Absolutely not. When the outburst subsides, the person who was using vilification will feel like a……douche.
Always remember, like attracts like! There’s no denying this.
Lawrence Massacre Story On Podcast
Summary of Self-Control
We’ve learned that our thoughts and actions towards others resemble an electric magnet which attracts to us the same sort of thought and the same sort of action that we, ourselves, create.
We have learned that the human mind responds in kind, to whatever thought impressions it receives. We have learned that kindness begets kindness and unkindness and injustice beget unkindness and injustice.
Everything we put out comes back in a much larger measure. We have learned that the human mind responds in kind, to all sensory impressions it receives.
Now it’s time to go into lesson seven which is an extremely critical one – Habit of Doing More Than Paid For.
“The mind doesn’t know anything about age, your subconscious mind knows nothing about time and space. And so, I am hanging around young people all the time and I operate like they do. I don’t think of myself as being old.” – Bob Proctor
That’s how powerful the mind is. I want you think way back when people had to take ships from one continent to another. The Berlin Olympics was a prime example of how far the athlete had to go physically to obtain rewards. Now, or just in the last couple of decades, the Concorde was developed, which was an aircraft that can get from New York to London in three hours. The mind created that. You can go so far to say, “oh, well academics created that.” Well, we created academics. What was before schooling?
Let’s think about conditioning the mind. If you say, “I’m getting fatter, shorter, older, uglier.” You feel all of those feelings that relate to those comparative adjectives, right? Feeling of depression, stress, sadness – you name it.
Conversely, if you say the opposite and think the opposite by reaffirming positive thoughts, you will believe it. You will believe anything you feed your subconscious mind.
I told myself that I was “black” my entire life because society labeled me that way. Coming over here to Thailand, where labelling is taken to the extreme, I started to feel 10x worse here than I did in America until I did away with the societal perception.
I can go back to when I first watched the secret in 2007 and tell you that I started to believe that I can control my life. Yes, I can control what was going on outside of me. When the experimental stages were ongoing, I realized that I can save money, go on trips, see beautiful countries and stop using my childhood blueprint of “not having enough” as an excuse.
A lot of people would say, “what about the poor people in Africa? Bangladesh? Parts of Southeast Asia? What about those paces.” Well, when you’re born into poverty, you don’t know what life is outside of it. You’re born into the “not-enoughedness.” You don’t have the resources (not educationally speaking, either), to escape that lifestyle because you don’t know anything beyond those barriers.”
Look at the Southside of Chicago, for instance. This is a place of desolation and hooliganism, killing each other nightly. Where at? AMERICA! African American children not knowing the difference between right and wrong. Why? Their minds were conditioned at the very beginning when they were born into those impoverished neighborhoods. Mom & dad were out participating in the worst of activities while they were getting bullied at school until that one day….someone came to rescue. Someone who is/was gang affiliated. There’s no other reality. The outlook is as drab as it gets….but how come Serena & Venus Williams were born in the heart of Compton whereas they had to jump on the Tennis courts, ducking bullets that were being shot by rival gangs?
It’s all about conditioning the mind.
Copy the following formula and place it conspicuously in your room where you will see it as you retire at night and as you arise in the morning.
First: You must master the habit of procrastination and eliminate it from your make=up. This habit of putting off until tomorrow that which you should have done last week or last year or a score of years ago is gnawing at the very vitals of your being, and you can accomplish nothing until you throw it off.
The method through which you eliminate procrastination is based upon a well known and scientifically tested principle of psychology which has been referred to in the two preceding lessons of this course as Auto-Suggestion.
Having chosen a definite chief aim as my life-work I now understand it to be my duty to transform this purpose into reality.
Therefore, I will form the habit of taking some definite action each day that will carry me one step nearer the attainment of my definite chief aim.
I know that procrastination is a deadly enemy of all who would become leaders in any undertaking, and I will eliminate this habit from my make-up by:
a. Doing some one definite thing each day, that ought to be done, without anyone telling me to do it.
b. Looking around until I find at least one thing that I can do each day, that i have not been in the habit of doing, and that will be of value to others, without expectation of pay.
c. Telling at least one other person, each day, of the value of practicing this habit of doing something that ought to be done without being told to do it.
I can see that the muscles of the body become strong in proportion to the extent to which they are used, therefore I understand that the habit of initiative also becomes fixed in proportion to the extent that it is practiced.
I realized that the place to begin developing the habit of initiative is in the small, common-place things connected with my daily work, therefore I will go at my work each day as if I were doing it solely for the purpose of developing this necessary habit of initiative.
I understand that by practicing this habit of taking the initiative in connection with my daily work I will be not only developing that habit, but i will also be attraction the attention of those who will place greater value on my services as a result of this practice.
A man stepped into Napoleon Hill’s office one afternoon almost a hundred years ago and said, “excuse me, do you know the man who wrote this book?” The book was called “self-confidence” and Napoleon Hill had written it, but he chose not to tell the man at the time.
“It must have been the hand of fate that slipped this book into my pocket yesterday afternoon, because I was about ready to go out there and punch a hole into Lake Michigan. I had about come to the conclusion that everything and everybody, including god, had it in for me until I read this book, and it gave me a new viewpoint and brought me the courage and the hope that sustained my through the night. I made up my mind that if I could see the man who wrote the book he could help me get on my feet again. Now, I am here and I would like to know what can you do for a man like me?”
Napoleon Hill, at that specific moment, was evaluating that man from head-to-toe. The lines of discouragement on his face, the posture of his body, ten days’ growth of beard on his face, and his nervous manner.
“I have listened to you with a great deal of interest, and I wish that there was something which I could do to help you, but there is absolutely nothing.”
The man’s face became pale.
“However, while there’s nothing I can do for you, there is a man in this building to whom I will introduce you, if you wish, who can help you regain your lost fortune and put you back on your feet again.”
The man jumped up and elatedly said, “for god’s sake lead me to this man!”
He took the man downstairs to his laboratory and lead him to a curtain. After unveiling what was behind the curtain (a mirror), he pointed at the glass and said, “there stand the man to whom I promised to introduce you. There is the only man in this world who can put you back on your feet again, and unless you sit down and become acquainted with that man, as you never became acquainted with him before, you might as well go over and punch a hole in Lake Michigan, because you will be of no value to yourself or to the world until you know this man better.
He dropped his head, wept, and left.
Napoleon Hill had no idea that he would see this man again until three days later – podcast (https://www.spreaker.com/episode/11719416)
But the moral of the story is we’re terrified of confronting….ourselves. We’re terrified of getting in the mirror, in the face of US, and expressing ourselves. The strength, power, and possible that lies formant inside of man is incredible, but a lot of us never discovers the value of self-reliance.
Have you ever been driving your car and suddenly realized you left the emergency brake on? Did you push down harder on the gas to overcome the drag of the brake? No, of course not. You simply released the brake, and with no extra effort, you started to go faster.
A lot of people go through life with a psychological emergency brake on. They hold negative images of themselves and suffer from all the effects and powerful experiences. Everyone, especially Asians, have a tendency of living in their own comfort zone. Their social groups because their culture restricts them to speaking to people outside their nationality.
In addition to individuals, we have a lot of inaccurate beliefs about reality or harbour guilt and self doubt.
I want you to think of it this way, your comfort zone is a prison you live in. A confined area that you just can’t break free from…..they included the collection of can’t, musts, must nots, and other unfounded beliefs.
I like the story Jack Canfield talked about that pertained to a baby elephant. This baby elephant is tied down to a wooden post. The elephant’s area is determined by the length of the rope….the elephant’s comfort zone. So, years later, when the elephant turns into a massive 5-ton beast, it doesn’t even try to cut loose from the rope because it was conditioned as a baby not to.
Perhaps this also describes you. You’re trapped, or you feel you are. You harbour all the limiting beliefs about yourself and images that you took in while you were young. If this describes you, the good news is that you can change your comfort zone. How? There are four different ways:
- You can use affirmations and positive self-talk to affirm already having what you want, doing what you want, and being the way you want.
- You can create powerful and compelling new internal images of having, doing, and being what you want.
- You can use the revolutionary technique called Tapping Therapy.
- You can simply change your behavior.
Podcast – https://www.spreaker.com/episode/8560762